When I was young, my mum lived in the same area as she had done all her life. She had known people there forever, and lots of cousins lived nearby for me to play with, and kids played in the streets (she could watch from the window as a SAHM). Organised play dates were not a thing
I moved to another city to live with my husband, not having any friends up here. So, when my son was born I didn’t have a ready made support network, so I went out to various baby / toddler classes every day, and asked other mums if they wanted to meet for coffee etc, after a while there was a group of us who had coffee after a certain class, and if I was talking to a new person at the group, I would invite them too. I made quite a lot of friends this way: DS is nearly 5, and I still regularly meet up with some of them.
The kids are all based in other parts of the city, so my son doesn’t really know anyone else at school. So chatting with another mum at the gate, I suggested we swap numbers and we arranged a play date. I’ve also did similar in the local park where my son gets on with another child.
My mum is horrified about this and seems to think it comes across as really clingy and desperate (I’m really neither of these, I just like to widen my and my sons social network). I appreciate not everyone is comfortable making the first move, so I often initiate things. From then on, if a friendship isn’t really reciprocal I tend to let it slide as people do have lots on in their lives (
Aibu to Initiate play dates etc or am I being a weirdo