To occasionally expect people to ask about my children if I ask about theirs

[Journey]

At work I'll ask my colleagues how their DC are or how their pregnancy is going etc, however, they never ask after my DC. It is always a one-sided conversation. I don't expect them to always ask about my DC but it would be nice at least some of the time! Has anybody else experienced this and if so how did you handle it?

I just write them off as people with limited social skills Journey
This sort of lack of manners is surprisingly common though - even in otherwise perfectly OK people

yabu. if you want to talk about your children just do it. equally if you are genuinely interested in other peoples ask questions.

personally my heart sinks when some folk at work start into some long story about violin lessons or potty training.

If you are feeling really cross about it just don't ask them about theirs - but I am interested in other people's children and lives (not in a stalker-sociopath sort of way of course ) so I tend not to be able to stick to this "well sod you then" policy for long

Perhaps they don't want to have a child based conversation and are not asking you about your children in the hope that you will stop asking them about theirs. Or perhaps there's no stopping you once you've started talking about your children (and I speak as someone who will talk about ds until my colleagues eyes glaze over ), so they know from experience not to get you started.

marina is right. and it's not just limited to people talking about their children/ignoring others. I remember being at a party talking to a - cough- banker - who at the end of our "conversation" knew nothing about me - neither my name, my profession, whether I had any children, what my favourite colour was - but I knew one thing about him: he was boring

I really find this at some of the official dinners I have to go to for work bundle. They sit there like lemons and expect to have interested questions fed to them all night. It really is dire isn't it

Sometimes people go to work so they can have a break from children, theirs and others?

In a work situation I don't mention my children at all. But I share your frustration when I meet up with people I knew when the kids were younger. I always ask after theirs but they are never interested enough to ask after mine.

dire is the word marina

do you blame the parents???

I think a work culture where the one-to-one support staff (eg PAs and Executive Assistants) are mostly women with overall better social skills has a great deal to do with it bundle

I once had someone complain about my dp because of this subject. I think the comment to me in annoyance was something like 'Well you ask about my children but your dp doesnt'. I think my comment was 'Well he is a man!'lol. I dont think you should be offended Journey. Not everyone is well mannered and to us our dc's are very special but to others they are just kids I'm afraid.

I fully appreciate that some people don't want to talk about their children at work, and don't worry if I was asked about my children I'd only say a sentence or two! (This applies both in and out of work). I think Marina has helped me to identify why I find it confusing, because they're are ok people so you would think that they would have basic manners. (My main issue is how people can just talk about themselves whether it is about their children, holidays, job etc and not have the decency to ask me at least one little tiny question!)

BOOndle is right, it's not just about children, most people just aren't intrested in most other people at all. I've come to the stark realisation that of my dozens of acquantances, almost none ever ask me anything other than the perfunctory "How are you?", or want to hear what I have to say. After 3 yrs of being chatty to everybody, I've reverted to making little effort to talk to any of the school gate mums. It's relatively rare for any of them to ask after me or mine -- I'm giving up on being the one to always initiate chat and ask "How's your child doing in Yr 1?", "Did they enjoy the zoo trip?", etc.