WWYD elderly grandparent and lockdowns

[Shoulderballs]

My gran is 93. She has her own home and manages quite well - is adamant she doesn’t want to move into any kind of residential care or family as she’s comfortable and secure in her own home.
Since Covid one of the family closer to her gets her shopping, She has other family members and friends popping in most days but she may go two or three days without seeing someone. Those days she spends chatting to friends on the phone.
She thinks the Covid rules are ‘ridiculous’ and anyone who refuses to break them to visit her she is being ‘over the top’.
Basically she wants to stay in her own home and entertain visitors every day for company. I’ve tried explaining that not everyone is happy to break the rules and we are all very wary of visiting and infecting her. She says she doesn’t care and she has to die of something.
I live 35 miles away, having to pass through two counties that are under restrictions (mine and her county are both under restrictions, we are in Wales) and she wants me to go over to her home, she seems determined to have a visitor every day and she gets really short and bitchy when we say we aren’t meant to.
Her needs as much as food etc are being met, she manages her home so these visits are just for company. Would you travel? Im afraid of infecting her but she wants to keep pushing boundaries - she can be quite manipulative and push all the guilt buttons until you give in. Then she assumes that if you visit on a Thursday day then you’ll come every Thursday.

WWYD? Stand firm and don’t break the rules Or visit and hope I don’t get stopped by the police?

Se panics if she gets a Scam or junk call from someone, If track and trace called her to ask who she’s had in her house she’d be frightened to death. When I tell her this she just closes down the conversation. Completely has buried her head in the sand to any other way of thinking except hers.
I’ve warned her she’s at risk of prosecution, her neighbors could even report her or any of her many friends that she brags on the phone to that she’s having people in.
🤯

Our new local restrictions now mean she shouldn’t have anyone in her home anyway. I’ve totted up and over a two week period she typically has around 9 different people from 7 different households.

Ah but I only have one in at a time she says 🤯

@LiveFromHome

We are still seeing my DH grandparents who are in their late 80's. We know the risks, they know the risks and we've all talked about and accepted them.

If you're not happy to take the risk then don't see her.

If DH and I stick strictly to the 'roolz' then two elderly people that we love will be living a thoroughly miserable existence and their mental and physical health will rapidly decline - I'd never forgive myself if one of DH grandparents died and we'd stopped them seeing us or their great-grandchildren in their final months. We choose the risk of catching or transmitting covid to them over that, and so do they.

What if it means you pass on Covid to another family and their elderly members die gasping for breath? Do your elderly relatives' wants trump other people's rights not to die of the virus? You could set up Facetime and interact with your relatives that way, like the rest of us have had to.

What if it means you pass on Covid to another family and their elderly members die gasping for breath?

If DH or I get covid, it won't be caught from DH's grandparents. If we get it and pass it on to another family, that's going to happen regardless of whether we've seen the grandparents or not.

@LiveFromHome

What if it means you pass on Covid to another family and their elderly members die gasping for breath?

If DH or I get covid, it won't be caught from DH's grandparents. If we get it and pass it on to another family, that's going to happen regardless of whether we've seen the grandparents or not.

What if you pass it on to DH's grandparents, they go into hospital and the nurse or doctor treating them dies of Covid-19 or they pass it on to their elderly parents and they die? I don't think you've thought this through very well TBH.