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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I have been sh*tting blood for over a month.

51 replies

bluedonuts · 26/09/2020 22:50

It’s personal and I hate posting on here for advice about it but it’s 10:45pm, I have nobody to call and people on here seem to be straight-forward and honest.

I have ulcerative colitis, have had my large intestine removed five years ago. Have had non-stop problems on and off but the past two months it has been quite bad.

I am struggling massively. Working mum with a six month old baby.

Most nights I am spending around 3-5 hours on the toilet with bad diarrhoea, I think I am suffering a prolapse and I am bleeding most times. Every other night for the last few weeks I have been up all night and then falling asleep throughout the day and feeling like a crap mum for it.

Last month I noticed heavy bleeding with large blood clots so I went to A&E who said I needed to see my consultant as I was flaring, and prescribed me steroids. I tried to get an appointment with my consultant but they didn’t have any. Over the next few weeks I was just deteriorating with constant diarrhoea and bleeding and fatigue. After a particularly bad night last Thursday I went to the GP the next morning who took my observations and said they were bad (high pulse around 120 and low blood pressure & low grade fever) and that he wanted me to go to the hospital. He sent me straight to the surgical team.

After a couple fingers up the butt, a couple of assessments and 6 hours of waiting, I was told the consultants wouldn’t be able to see me. But that I needed urgent investigations and they would be in touch on Monday. I asked whether it would be possible to have some steroids or enamas to tide me over and they said they didn’t want me to have anything as they preferred I stay in this condition so as not to mask any symptoms. But they would definitely be in touch Monday.

The weekend was hell and I have heard nothing until today in the form of a letter saying that I have an appointment with my consultant on 2 November.

Last night I was up until 9am with a bad stomach and today I’m bleeding heavily again.

There is absolutely no point going to the hospital, but does anyone know how I can speed things up or at least get any other help in the meantime? It’s really affecting my mental health and I’m just feeling like a shit mum right now.

Thank you x

OP posts:
Hawkmoth · 26/09/2020 22:51

PALS Flowers

iVampire · 26/09/2020 22:54

A&E

Clarinsmum · 26/09/2020 22:55

Sorry this is happening to you. I have a chronic illness too, RA, and I know how woeful the NHS is at caring at this time. You aren’t a bad mum, just an ill person not getting adequate treatment. Hope things improve for you soon.

loutypips · 26/09/2020 22:58

I have UC too, although not as bad as yours.
Do you have a number for the IDB nurses? Not that it sounds like they will be much help. Contact PALS at the hospital too.
If it carries on/gets worse I'd go back to A&E. and I'd go back until they keep you in to investigate.

Flywheel · 26/09/2020 22:58

I think it sounds like you need hospital treatment. When dh gets that bad he ends up in hospital with iv steroids and i think iron infusions. There's no way you can go on till November. If you're having a flare up that needs hospital treatment surely your consultant ( or another doctor) will have to see you. I'm so sorry you're going through this. You are being badly let down

seriouslynonames · 26/09/2020 22:59

You poor thing, that sounds awful. Can you speak to the GP again? It doesn't sound like you can wait another month to see a consultant in November, you need to be seen urgently. I know it's not in reach for many, but is there any chance you could afford a private appointment if there really is no way to get your November appointment brought forward?
Wishing you well, you're not a shit mum, you're doing your best in very stressful circumstances. I am struggling with different health issues to you right now, and also often feeling like I'm letting everyone down, especially the kids. But I'm doing my best, it's all we can do.
Hope you get seen soon x

Haggisfish · 26/09/2020 23:00

Yes your gp might be able to phone straight through to consultant.

FairiesWillFly · 26/09/2020 23:01

Go and see a private consultant. You do not need health insurance. Phone local private hospital and say you are self funded. The consultant will cost£100-£150 to see you. This is what you need to do.

Batshitbeautycosmeticsltd · 26/09/2020 23:02

I'm so sorry! Could you drive to another A&E, say you went for a drive or something and fell ill? The NHS is shit just now.

cloudylemonade13 · 26/09/2020 23:03

Sorry you are going through this, I also have UC so really feel for you. Agree with others about PALS. Also do you think your GP could push things along for you with the consultants on Monday? Nov 2 is quite a long (and completely unacceptable) time to wait with such a bad flare up

loutypips · 26/09/2020 23:04

And you are not a shit mum. You've got a little baby and you're suffering. You need treatment, god knows why they won't give you pred!

AnnaMagnani · 26/09/2020 23:06

GP Monday - you prob need an admission for iv steroids +/- iron/blood.

Is your consultant gastro or surgical? Massively biassed here (medic not surgeon) but you are going to be better off being admitted under gastro than surgeons.

NotMyFinestMoment · 26/09/2020 23:10

Go back to A&E and report this to PALS. Ask for an emergency telephone consultation with your GP and ask him to give you a letter to take to hospital.

JacktomyDaniel · 26/09/2020 23:15

Please don't let this carry on. Demand to be admitted. Blood loss can lead to death.

DishRanAwayWithTheSpoon · 26/09/2020 23:15

I am so sorry you are going through this, its pretty shocking

Do you know who it was who said they would call you on monday? The name of the dr

You cannot wait till november for an appointment, your consultant is going to have to see you, its simply not acceptable to say theres no appointments and not offer any alternative.

I would ring their secretary first thing on monday, explain the situation, the advice youve had from a&e, the name of the dr who saw you if possible and give them an opportunity to either see the consultant or one of their team at least asap. If that fails I agree that PALs is entirely appropriate

time4anothername · 26/09/2020 23:18

you need to be on the phone to every number you have, GP, IBD clinic, consultant's admin, gastro clinic admin. The already bad NHS admin is in tatters in many areas now. It has not been properly conveyed that you are an urgent case who meets criteria for admission. You are not a bad Mum, if you find it hard to fight for yourself, imagine you are fighting for you daughter as if she was ill because it's the same thing in a way.

Winniewonka · 26/09/2020 23:21

Massive hugs OP, agree to with advice saying get emergency appointment with your GP on Monday. Tell them exactly what you've told us on here and what you are going through. At the very minimum you need a sick note, you can't go to work in this condition.
Are you looking after your baby alone? You need urgent help as you're struggling to cope with your condition, also let your doctor know this. Have you any family/friends or has your baby got relatives who can help out? You will need this should you have to stay in hospital.
Don't try to struggle on alone.

DishRanAwayWithTheSpoon · 26/09/2020 23:21

Actually scrap that i think regardless of what happens you should speak to Pals, because youve been treated really poorly

You are not a crap mum, you are ill

jakeyboy1 · 26/09/2020 23:22

Can you phone through to the specialist nurses? They always help my husband. Sounds awful for you.

CoffeeRunner · 26/09/2020 23:23

A&E. That level of rectal bleeding probably needs admission.

You are more than justified in going.

You are not a bad mum at all. You have a flare up of a serious illness. You can’t possibly be to blame for that Flowers.

GoldfishParade · 26/09/2020 23:29

I'm sorry but the NHS needs to he completely overhauled. This is a fucking joke. I cant believe you need to wait until 2 November, it's a disgrace. I'm so sorry you are dealing with this, but I would go to A&E

willloman · 26/09/2020 23:30

A&E and tell them you are not leaving until treatment provided.
No good if they leave you to quietly expire so they can get a diagnosis!
You are a patient not a guinea pig.
Do not be afraid to disagree with their plans and ask for second opinion.

SomethingM1ss1ng · 26/09/2020 23:33

I wish I could give you a hug, you are not a bad mom- you are having a health issue which is interfering with your life and you should concentrate on sorting this out.

Please go to the A&E and as the previous posters have said contact PALS. Waiting until November doesn’t seem like an option

Dustballs · 26/09/2020 23:37

I have been in a similar, but much much less serious position.

Straight away email PALS - cc in anyone important that you can think of. I usually add Matt Hancock and the Guardian.

It may sound mad - but the hospital has sorted it out straight away every time.

PALS is an informal service to help you manage your concerns, if you wish to make a formal complaint please see the link above to the complaints page. Email: [email protected].

finished31 · 26/09/2020 23:37

If you have no IBD nurse then call the consultants secretary and ask beg to be seen.

I've had UC for:32 years and it sucks I'm not as bad as you.

Come back and let us know how you are x

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