To feel so alone

[poorandlonely]

I do a demanding but low paid job, minimum wage, as a carer for people with severe learning difficulties. It's a job without contact with adults apart from service users and staff have staggered breaks. Money is so tight but I'm single, do shift work and child care means I can't get another job to do to earn more. I can't afford to go out anywhere and don't have a car to get places. I'm so lonely.

Sorry to hear that, it sounds very isolating. Do you have any extended family or friends?

Im sorry girl. I've been there and it can be mind crushingly lonely. Gentle hugs

@formerbabe

Sorry to hear that, it sounds very isolating. Do you have any extended family or friends?

I've got no siblings, one parent but with advanced dementia and uncle in his 90s. The rest (cousins and their parents) all live abroad thousands of miles away.

I'm sorry to hear this. Being lonely is hard. do you have any friends at all?

@BigBreastedMumma

I'm sorry to hear this. Being lonely is hard. do you have any friends at all?

No, not really, we used to socialise through work when we had shared breaks but can't now. I can't afford to outside of work.

I think it's quite tough right now because a lot of things people would normally recommend are not on because of covid.

How old are your kids? How long until they're out of child care and more independent?

year 2 and 3.

Is there a Meetup group in your area. They go for walks, to the cinema etc ,all sorts of activities, all ages. Your library will have details of any book groups. Is there a chance you could find carer work that's not shifts? I know every agency I pass near me is desperate for carers , all kinds of hours on offer .

Posted to soon. I'd look at LearnDirect & TraintoGain & see if you are eligible for any of their free job related NVQ courses so you can upskill . A lot of them are online, flexible learning: & free if you get working tax credit or any kind of benefits.

It's hard work that sort of job, I have done it myself when younger. At the time I moved on too working in an adult college, supporting adults with disabilities in their studies. Could you do something like this, try support work in schools or colleges? It's less physically demanding and you would work with others more.

Could you invite your colleagues round one evening?or possibly better do you have one colleague who you feel you could develop a friendship with. Invite them round on evening or an afternoon for coffee. Whatever suits

What about parents of your children's friends? Could you invite a child and their parent round one Saturday afternoon or one day after school?
I would start putting myself out there a bit more if I were you. What do you have to lose? Just give a version of the truth, say you work long hours and don't really know anyone in the area so it would be lovely if they would.come with their child so you could get to know some other mums.

Sounds like you’d be just perfect for a move into an Early years practitioner role. You can get funding to do a level 2 or 3 course depending on your current qualifications.

You could work much more sociable hours and meet more people too? It’s a great community.

Try your local council or college to find out more?

Op how are you? I would love to know you are safe. I care about you. Please could you reply to confirm you are OK.

I'm sorry OP loneliness is hard and there often aren't any easy solutions.

Oh I am really sorry to hear this. I do understand and importantly always remember being lonely is no reflection on you, it is the circumstances.

Our lovely bookshop does a (free) online book group now, the library does similar - could you maybe research one little thing like that?

I know my local park has a community garden where anyone can go. Again that is free.

Just wanted me think in a week would maybe lift the spirits a bit x

'just wanted me think' = just wonder if