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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that one hour entry slots are not parent friendly?

166 replies

TotorosFurryBehind · 24/09/2020 21:48

Feeling sad after reading our favourite place to visit as a family has just gone back to timed entry slots of one hour, due to escalating Covid risk.

I understand the rationale, but with a toddler with variable naps this turns a relaxing family walk into a logistical operation that will stress us both out.

We've hardly used our National Trust membership in the past months due to timed entry and now our other place to visit has gone the same way ☹️

OP posts:
ThursdayLastWeek · 25/09/2020 08:04

Where I work we have 10 minute slots. That’d really put the wind up you!

An hour is loads of time.

Lolaloveslemons · 25/09/2020 08:05

Wow, why are people being so harsh?!

Because we are in a pandemic and the OP is here complaining when these places are trying to do their best.
NT have cut jobs already and are struggling.
There are so many ways the OP could make this work - better organisation, leaving extra time ‘just in case’... packing up the car the night before... It’s not ideal but we all have to adapt

SurreyHillsGirl · 25/09/2020 08:06

YABU Hmm

cologne4711 · 25/09/2020 08:06

thanks for the advice those who have told me to be more organised. I'll just have a talk with 16 month old DD about her tendency to take a massive smushy shit requiring a bath and clothes change

I am always surprised at people who think the rest of the world should change to fall in line with their choice to become a parent (or indeed the toileting habits of their toddler).

You can always change a nappy in the car if needsbe. Anyway a 16 month old doesn't need taking to attractions, the local park is fine. Wait until they can actually get something out of it and save money.

Lolaloveslemons · 25/09/2020 08:07

My approach is that if I have booked 10-11 arrival or similar, I aim to arrive at 9:45

This

HaggieMaggie · 25/09/2020 08:08

This is such a typical MN privileged post. 😂

Lolaloveslemons · 25/09/2020 08:09

thanks for the advice those who have told me to be more organised. I'll just have a talk with 16 month old DD about her tendency to take a massive smushy shit requiring a bath and clothes change

This happens every time you try to leave the house?

Didntwanttochangemyname · 25/09/2020 08:19

OP, it's probably about time you learn to help yourself.

Badger2033 · 25/09/2020 08:19

I get what your saying OP. It’s not that you can’t get there at that time it’s that of course DC will be up 2 hours late / early throw all their nap times off, refuse to sleep in the car on the way there and then arrive tired and grumpy. Then you’re stressed out and they don’t get the best out the day. It’s rubbish! There’s no real activity I enjoy anymore as everything just seems so uptight and full of rules and regulation and judgement.

For me it’s still better to go out than not but I don’t blame you for not wanting to bother. Covid has ruined my maternity leave and I’m really bitter about it. It could have been 100% worse and I know that but life is shit right now. I hate worrying about family that are ECV. I hate my baby seeing everyone in masks as normal. I hope the vaccine is here soon and life can return to a more normal normal.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 25/09/2020 08:20

Timed slots are one of the few good things to come out of covid. More organised and much easier to manage.

Asterion · 25/09/2020 08:30

@TotorosFurryBehind

We'll, thanks for the advice those who have told me to be more organised. I'll just have a talk with 16 month old DD about her tendency to take a massive smushy shit requiring a bath and clothes change.

People saying how do I get her to School... maybe look up toddler in the dictionary

And heaven forbid that I should enjoy any leisure activity in a leisurely manner 🤨

Yup, YABU. And, er, this is Mumsnet. Many of us know what it's like to have a 16 month old toddler...
Heffersclub · 25/09/2020 08:31

PFB by any chance? The world doesn't turn around toddler nap times... My daughter slept through her first trip to the zoo. Wasn't the end of the world.

WokThisWay · 25/09/2020 08:44

I bloody love timed entry to places. I’m not mad keen on other people and have a thing about punctuality. Grin

ZoeTurtle · 25/09/2020 08:53

YANBU at all. Everywhere should plan their policies to accommodate people with toddlers who have variable nap times and whose mothers are incapable of waking them up and who have explosive shits requiring a bath (?) every time they try to leave the house. Anything else is madness.

Bluntness100 · 25/09/2020 08:56

Guessing this didn’t go the op hoped,,,

IrmaFayLear · 25/09/2020 08:56

Too many fruit and vegetables if the “smushy shit” (eeugh) happens all the time.

You are in charge. So tiresome when people are ruled by their little emperors and empresses. Of course spanners get thrown into the works occasionally, but imo disorganised parents have disorganised toddlers. Or rigid parents have rigid toddlers.

MrsShelton · 25/09/2020 08:57

What’s your solution then OP?

A free for all?

randomsabreuse · 25/09/2020 08:58

It's not so much that you can't get there for a slot but that by booking in advance you have to go on a day where you had a crap night's sleep because teething, or general toddlerness and toddler is grumpy and it's pissing down with rain, a bit windy and the day before or the next day was perfect weather and everyone slept well.

I can get my 2 (5 and very nearly 2) out to places but I have also come home very shortly after arriving on time because it's just not working (and 5 year old needed the consequence of not listening!)

Asterion · 25/09/2020 09:06

If the slot's a disaster on the day you booked it for, just don't go.

Sexnotgender · 25/09/2020 09:07

YABU. I also have a toddler.

Stringervest · 25/09/2020 09:08

Haven't RTFT because I was getting increasingly annoyed with the snark. So many perfect people on this thread!

I'm with you OP. We have a baby and a toddler. The baby has three naps every day at variable times and won't sleep in the pram. He usually misses out on sleep during the week due to nursery runs for the toddler and then wakes up all night because he's overtired. We want to prioritise his naps at the weekend so he can catch up, but this means it's difficult to plan ahead. The timed entry is a pain.

I don't think you're saying that you don't understand why timed entry is being implemented. You're just disappointed. YANBU.

One of our local NT places has been trialling ditching timed entry, although I don't know if that will have changed again now. Maybe worth giving some of your local ones a call to see if they're doing the same? We've also enjoyed visiting beaches and Forestry Commission properties.

canigohomenow · 25/09/2020 09:08

Shove her in the pram if she's asleep - sit her up to the table if she's awake.

Take snacks - lots and lots of snacks!

oakleaffy · 25/09/2020 09:12

If a kid is tired, he or she will sleep anywhere.
Who plans their day around a kid's need to sleep in the day?... Sleeping in a pushchair or car seat is fine.

Marzipan12 · 25/09/2020 09:17

We are in a pandemic, yes it's stating the obvious in reply to the poster mentioned it's stating tne obvious but some people have obviOusby for gotten and need reminding. Places need to plan around guidlines at tne moment and are doing the best they can to try and stay open. Now is not the time to bleat about somewhere being parent friendly. What does that mean anyway? OPS requests to fit in around naps and explosive nappies won't fit in around older kids or teens. You carnt please everyone esp in a pandemic. OP get grip, naps and explosive nappies are only the beginning of parenthood, there's going to be alot more inconvenience than this during parenthood you just get on with it. There people with severely disabled children and babies on here who would love to just have to deal with naps and nappies

QuestionMarkNow · 25/09/2020 09:19

@Lolaloveslemons

Wow, why are people being so harsh?!

Because we are in a pandemic and the OP is here complaining when these places are trying to do their best.
NT have cut jobs already and are struggling.
There are so many ways the OP could make this work - better organisation, leaving extra time ‘just in case’... packing up the car the night before... It’s not ideal but we all have to adapt

Yes and the OP also states that she been hit very hard by the pandemic. You have no idea what the OP has gone through. (FWIW she might have had some v close relative dying from Covid or she ended up been the only carer etc...)

She also clearly says this is was TIPPED her over. The impossibility to do an activity she was looking forward to wo the (usual??) stress. If she is one of those people who have been badly impacted by Covid, more stress will be the last thing she will want.

@TotorosFurryBehind, I get what you are saying. Some children are tricky, more than others. And the pandemic is making what was a normal outing a bit like preparing for war (see the comments about preparing EVERYTHING the night before etc...).

I haven’t been to any NT place since the lockdown. I can’t be bothered with a specific arrival time, having to think about it the day before etc... It’s taking a lot of the pleasure out of it (esp because these places are still heaving anyway).