To expect my reception age child to be doing at least a bit of 'work'?

[Hmmmmminteresting]

I may have this wrong as he is my first born. But dc is in reception, prior to this he was at nursery post lockdown till end of Aug.
I wouldnt say he is particularly clever, but he enjoyed learning. He was very good at phonics, numbers and rhyming. He could do basic adding and subtraction up to 30 eg. He could do 27 take away 4 etc. Since he has started school he does nothing, they just play.
Don't get me wrong I am all for them doing this and would much rather they play than sat all day 'working'. But they are literally doing nothing. He keeps telling me its boring. I feel like he has taken 5 steps back.
I asked his teacher briefly if he was correct and she said yes, it's a transition from nursery to year 1 so its focused on play and not school work. I didnt push further but I've come away feeling really deflated.

Aibu to expect them to teach them something?!

Genuinely didnt mean it to come across that way i thought that was basic for his age.

Oh give over. Nobody could actually believe that most 4 year olds could do double digit subtraction.

few rewards for helping other children settle in at school that have been less confident.

Not that you’re bragging though, eh?

What kind of “rewards” do they give for socially and academically gifted four year olds these days?

IME, the kids who were “rewarded” early in reception, were the ones who needed more positive reinforcement in order to do the right thing.

Does the teacher know he is bored?
Teachers don't know best about every single child.

Does the teacher know he is bored?
Teachers don't know best about every single child

Please don't tell the teacher he is bored.

It's interesting to see how parents have different ideas about how children learn best.

There is a private primary school near us where the children spend most of their time outdoors. They have a couple of structured sessions (literacy etc.) a day but mostly the children learn through play while the staff gently direct them. Apparently, they have very few behavioural issues and manage to cover fully all aspects of the primary curriculum. I'd secretly love to send our DC there but DH is concerned that they will just be messing about playing and will fall behind other children. My worry, on the other hand, is that some children are put off school by starting formal learning before they are ready. They are then branded failures and become demotivated. That seems far worse to me than spending the primary years 'playing'.

Your DD sounds unusually advanced for his age, but probably the truth is that reception children don't need to be learning the sorts of things you are describing. Within the limitations of the education system which we have, the teachers will know how to develop the skills which will be most useful to children in their future education. They are the professionals.

@MintyMabel

Genuinely didnt mean it to come across that way i thought that was basic for his age.

Oh give over. Nobody could actually believe that most 4 year olds could do double digit subtraction.

few rewards for helping other children settle in at school that have been less confident.

Not that you’re bragging though, eh?

What kind of “rewards” do they give for socially and academically gifted four year olds these days?

IME, the kids who were “rewarded” early in reception, were the ones who needed more positive reinforcement in order to do the right thing.

You are not very pleasant at all, are you

He does sound super advanced which, although amazing, presents some challenges for you, for him and his teachers. They have to leave no child behind but your son sound likes he could be dropped into the next year up and thrive. However you've given a very limited amount of information. If he can't do lots of the paragraph below, I would sit back and accept this is mostly a settling-in period and there will be plenty to challenge him down the line.

How is he with phonics sounds? How many does he know? How many exception words (like was, very, and etc) does he know? What sort of reading does he do? Can he count in 2s, 5s and 10s? Tell the time at all? Can he spell a CVC word and form his letters correctly? Can he retell a story in sequence and explain why characters acted the way they did? How is he with measurement - full, empty, longer than, shortest etc? Can he use a Venn or Carroll diagram? Tell a pyramid from a cone?

You can easily get him reading and that might be helpful. One of my children goes to school for the social element and does his learning in the afternoons at home, for different reasons to you.

Don't worry about mabel, she makes a habit of being not very nice. I can well believe you don't know what's 'standard' - there is no standard, really. But being comfortable enough with numbers over 20 that you can just pluck 4 off suggests an ease with number bonds that is quite startling.

@Woundedadmiral

I'll try and answer that...

How is he with phonics sounds? How many does he know? Hes great at phonics and knows most if not all. If he hears name he will try and write it or spell it out loud eg. Peter he will go p-eeeee-ttt-e--rrr

How many exception words (like was, very, and etc) does he know? Very broad vocabulary

What sort of reading does he do? Can he count in 2s, 5s and 10s? No he cant do that

Tell the time at all? Can't do that

Can he spell a CVC word and form his letters correctly? Nope

Can he retell a story in sequence and explain why characters acted the way they did? Yes

How is he with measurement - full, empty, longer than, shortest etc? Can do that

Can he use a Venn or Carroll diagram? Tell a pyramid from a cone? No to those

I would recommend the Mrs Wordsmith 'Enormous Year 1 book' or something like that to see everything your child will hopefully be able to do in the coming months and offer a bit of a challenge.

thanks @Woundedadmiral you've been very helpful

Thanks for this! What a lovely little boy. When you say that he will sound the different parts of the word out (great phonological awareness), does he know the different digraphs that are used to make up each sound? Like the long /e/ sound being made by 'ee' or the long /o/ sound being 'oa'? If not, it seems like he will twiddle his thumbs a bit while everyone learns their letter sounds and really enjoy learning all this after a couple of months. He also has about 100 'tricky' words to learn that don't follow the phonics rules and that will keep him busy.

There are times when the picture books etc all seem so slow for a bright child, but if he settled and happy and the school is good, I would focus on that as a great deal of this year is about getting off to a positive start. If he is truly frustrated I would just use Phonics Bloom and Doodlemaths to power on through a bit.

My pleasure. I am there and have been there, on both sides of the fence :)

nolongersurprised you can surely recognise that your child is gifted if she taught herself to read and tell the time and could count to 100 before school. I don't mean gifted as in top of the class but that's extremely gifted like 0.1% kind of territory.

Well, we knew she was smart but her big sister could read before school and we knew her sister was smart but not “gifted”. DH and I are both doctors and top of class/school smart but not gifted either.

We thought her numbers were just quirky - she assigned all the people in her life numbers at 2-3 years and is synaesthetic with them as well.

You are not very pleasant at all, are you
Neither are you it seems.

Don't worry about mabel, she makes a habit of being not very nice

Hasn’t stopped you following what I post, apparently. I suppose you think being passive aggressive makes you “very nice?”

I can well believe you don't know what's 'standard' - there is no standard, really.

Of course there is. If there weren’t, you wouldn’t have gone on to say suggests an ease with number bonds that is quite startling.

Parents with kids who are well ahead, know full well that they are. The faux “oh! thought it was normal that he was reading war and peace aged 4” is laughable.

Your child is now one of 30 of wildly different abilities, backgrounds and needs. Research the curriculum and push him at home if you want to, but at the moment I would far rather my sons were happy and felt safe at school than that the school focused on academic achievement. Some things they usually do (like reading diaries) they aren't doing because of COVID and being separated from other children, one way systems and masks are worrying for them. Its a scary time for everyone, and kids pick up on that. I would focus on being pleased how well he has settled in rather than complaining to the teacher about being given a reading book with no words in it.

Mabel no, I don't follow you, I just noticed you because you're exceptionally mean spirited. There is such a wide parameter for normal that no you couldn't call it a standard but that doesn't mean nothing can be surprising.

I haven't noticed anyone claiming their child read War and Peace at four or anything close. But as this is all laughable, why not laugh merrily somewhere else where you won't be making another parent's life just that little bit harder. You clearly don't have specialist knowledge so hard to see why you can't find something better to do. People are vulnerable about their children. You should stop to consider that.

I'm very reassured that this is normal then, I just hope that his passion for the academic stuff doesn't disappear if he is finding it boring.

If he’s engaged and enthusiastic and stays that way then don’t worry, honestly. With my DC’s friends I’ve seen a few children who start school barely recognising numbers/letters prove to be absolutely brilliant by the end of primary. Similarly, there’s a whole heap of children who are bright and seem very advanced to start with even out by year 3/4.

Read lots, read stuff that engages him and that’s harder than he can read himself. You don’t need to be “that mother” at school unless he demonstratively disengages.

Dd has just started F2 as well, she turned 5 at the beginning of September.

As far as I'm aware, her teacher does a sound a day with them and teaches the letter formation of the sound.
They've also started their first project (friends and family.)
The school are going to send home reading books and homework after half term.

Aside from that, I don't know what else they do all day. I think a lot of it is play based, when I ask I just get 'I can't remember'

Why are so many people believing their 4 year olds when they say they haven’t done anything but play? They are 4. They don’t know what they’ve done. If they think they’ve played all day then you actually need to be congratulating their teacher and thanking her for being so amazing that your child is doing acres of learning and not even noticing it.

I am a EYFS teacher now. I wasn’t when my children were small. My son could read fluently at 3 years old and was incredibly bright. Each day he went to FS and played. How wonderful that he could. He learned how to share, how to talk to children of all other races and backgrounds (not just his white middle class family at home), how to manage his own toilet habits, how to sit for extended periods, how to entertain himself without being spoon fed what to do by his mummy, fine motor skills, gross motor skills, how to resolve conflict, how to talk to a range of adults, how to move safety around spaces etc etc etc. He came out of FS infinitely more prepared for the education system than he went in. He’s still incredibly bright.

If your son is bored then it sounds like he does indeed have a lot to learn. There’s never a minute to be bored in my classroom. Perhaps he needs help with his interpersonal skills and how to initiate play with another child. This is certainly something my bright child needed help with. Teachers do a lot of modelling of how to behave, modelling the correct and incorrect way to do things. The children think it’s hilarious. You only have to look on here or go to a supermarket to see that many adults missed out on this vital stage of learning...

Hi, i have a ds in reception (one and only) and it's hard isn't it? We've gone from hearing about everything they've been doing to getting a vague description at the end of the day.
From what i can tell at the moment is they are trying to settle the children in more and learning the levels they are at so we're just going with the flow at the moment. As far as i can tell he's been learning a phonic sound a day and learning to form the letter. We found this out a week later when he was writing his name and using the technique he'd been taught 🙈

I’ve got a clever child that has just started reception and she’s loving it.she seems to be really developing her drawing skills and getting used to new routines etc. I think you just have to let go a bit but also realise they often demonstrate different skills at school to what they do at home. So for example, mine has been counting well for a long time but from the pictures put up, she’s getting distracted within the classroom and making errors she wouldn’t at home. The teachers have said they’re teaching her techniques about checking her work, ticking numbers off etc rather than counting itself. I imagine your child will be learning similar things. They have also explained the picture only books are really important re comprehension and skill building and to not have a moan at them about it.

I voted YABU, but then changed my mind. I could read before I went to Reception, and I remember how boring and confusing i found it. The teachers didn’t know what to do with me, and eventually just sent me off to the library to read on my own. If he’s genuinely getting bored, then I don’t see anything wrong with mentioning it to his teacher - there may be some extra worksheets he can have a go at. They all pretty much level out in the end.

Your little one sounds very bright. Especially with double digit maths! Is home education an option so you can provide him with a tailored education?

Why are so many people believing their 4 year olds when they say they haven’t done anything but play? They are 4.

^ and this. Some of the nonsense my ds says about his day in nursery sometimes is really funny. Ranges from 'nothing' to 'me and friend snuck out of nursery, walked up to the woods by ourselves, found the big bad wolf and blew his house down'.

I remember when my DD1 (now 11 and in year 7) started in Reception. It was very hard to get any details out of her day at school. She used to always simply say, ‘I played.’ She does have SEN and adoption related attachment issues, though, which made it even harder.

You’ll be having parents’ evenings where you’ll have the opportunity to find out what’s actually happening during the school day. You can also ask to see them at another time.