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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To report a family friend/business re coronavirus?

72 replies

mintich · 21/09/2020 14:33

A family friend I have known all my life runs a food establishment and works there full time. They live in an area with local lockdown. They havent been closed at all since the beginning of all this. Their whole family have tested positive for covid but they are refusing to get a test as they would have to close. Also they have said they have claimed furlough payments for their staff despite no staff being on furlough!
I know I should, but I dont know what's stopping me! Perhaps I feel like I'm betraying them.

OP posts:
namechangeinamillion · 21/09/2020 15:28

Are the family members with a positive test living in the same household as him?

namechangeinamillion · 21/09/2020 15:29

So his wife tested positive? Well then he should be isolating.

Don't know if I'd report or not tbh.

namechangeinamillion · 21/09/2020 15:30

If he has no symptoms then he shouldn't be getting a test. If his wife (who I'm assuming he lives with) was positive then he should be isolating

Original poster
mintich · 21/09/2020 15:30

@namechangeinamillion 3 of them do. His parents and sister have also tested positive too. They have been mixing inside the home, which they shouldn't have done either!

OP posts:
Thinkingg · 21/09/2020 15:30

Would I report people breaking the 6 person limit? No, those rules are so arbitrary.

Would I report someone who very likely has the virus, ignoring isolation and carrying on working in a food establishment? Yes, it's dangerous and irresponsible.

SonjaMorgan · 21/09/2020 15:31

I think you should stay out of it. I have no clue how you know what days a business is open and who has had test and who hasn't but I imagine there is hearsay involved. I closed my 6 month old business over covid and wasn't entitled to any help. The last thing any business owner needs right now is some busy body sticking their nose in.

Original poster
mintich · 21/09/2020 15:32

@sonjamorgan tests exactly my dilemma. If I then found out his family were going through financial hardship, I'd feel so guilty, even though it's his own doing

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 21/09/2020 15:33

I think he is extremely selfish to not get tested especially as he not only works front of house but also prepares a lot of the food.

He shouldn’t get tested. That’s jut what the guidelines say.

He absolutely should be isolating if a member of his household has tested positive.

Gentleness · 21/09/2020 15:35

@Fluffybutter

Oh another busybody .. how refreshing. Planning on grassing up the neighbours next when they have a elderly relative over the magic 6?
I want this man reporting. If I go to a cafe, I am trusting it to be safe and he is risking the health of his customers and the people they come into contact with. He is living in a household of people who've tested positive and is not only not self-isolating as he should be, but is active in a customer-facing role.

It's childishly ignorant to describe this situation as grassing up or to use the term busybody.

Original poster
mintich · 21/09/2020 15:35

His wife says she was told he should get tested. I'm not sure if that's because they are in a local lockdown area (I dont live in that area) or if she has misunderstood

OP posts:
SpringFan · 21/09/2020 15:37

If he is preparing food and should be isolating , report him.
If you believe he is claiming furlough payment fraudulently, please report to HRMC.

emilyfrost · 21/09/2020 15:37

I suppose I'm worried that by reporting I might take down his business!

That’s a risk they’re happy to take though, and if it does take down the business they have nobody to blame but themselves.

DeliasDinner · 21/09/2020 15:42

@Fluffybutter

Oh another busybody .. how refreshing. Planning on grassing up the neighbours next when they have a elderly relative over the magic 6?
To be frank, if you think shopping people who might be spreading this bloody virus knowingly is being a busybody, then I can only assume you've not been personally affected by covid? My DD is currently going through it and it's fucking terrifying. She told every single person she had been in contact with as soon as she developed symptoms, isolated, and as soon as her test came back positive, she informed the test and trace service. That's what we should all be doing. If people are irresponsible enough to take risks with other people's lives, they deserve reporting
AndwhenyougetthereFoffsomemore · 21/09/2020 15:43

I would report someone fraudulently claiming furlough, yes: it's our money that he's taking, and I have no patience for people who are making unfair use of that scheme - that's money that could go to schools, NHS, pensions etc and instead is going to unscrupulous business owners. If he's got enough business to need the staff, he should be paying them, not me!

Redglitter · 21/09/2020 15:47

@Thinkingg

Would I report people breaking the 6 person limit? No, those rules are so arbitrary.

Would I report someone who very likely has the virus, ignoring isolation and carrying on working in a food establishment? Yes, it's dangerous and irresponsible.

Completely agree.

Theres a huge difference between a neighbour having parents over and what this person is doing.

Smallereveryday · 21/09/2020 15:55

@Fluffybutter

Oh another busybody .. how refreshing. Planning on grassing up the neighbours next when they have a elderly relative over the magic 6?
... and this attitude folks is EXACTLY why we are in this shit situation and why the thing is in the increase.

Tbh honest OP.. I couldn't give a shit if their business collapsed. They can start another.. but if they spread it to me, my 83 yr old parents and my 50 yr old brother (immunosuppressed ) they don't get another chance to be 'un-dead' .. or suffer life long further health consequences.

The only solution to a pandemic is community cooperation and as the CSO said this morning ' I need to understand that my actions affect others, others who may well get very ill and die' .

Imloosingmyshit · 21/09/2020 16:13

Report them. Cheeky selfish fuckers.

JoeCalFuckingZaghe · 21/09/2020 16:20

I didn't think actual adults used the word grass as a verb to be honest.

LindaEllen · 21/09/2020 16:23

Honestly .. I think you should mind your own business. You sound like you've had too much time on your hands over lockdown and you need something to do. Try and find something more productive.

Original poster
mintich · 21/09/2020 16:27

@LindaEllen I definitely don't have too much time on my hands! He has been quite honest about what's he is doing and I'm asking opinions, which is the point of AIBU.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 21/09/2020 16:44

@JoeCalFuckingZaghe

I didn't think actual adults used the word grass as a verb to be honest.
You’re right.

We do dry snitching instead.

StripyHorse · 21/09/2020 16:54

I totally get that it might endanger their business if he isolates as he should, but, it can also endanger other people's livelihoods (customers) or even lives if he infects them and they become ill and have to isolate.

YWNBU to report.

Hadalifeonce · 21/09/2020 17:03

If this man is claiming furlough payments for staff he has not furloughed, he is stealing our money! He should be reported for it.
He also should certainly not be putting other people's lives at risk by not isolating.

ilovemyrednosedaymug · 21/09/2020 17:06

He should be reported for false furlough claims. The more that is stolen, the more we will all end up paying back in taxes. That money was to give people an income, not for businesses like him to commit fraud.

MomToTwoBabas · 21/09/2020 17:06

I know 4 people whose companys have claimed furlough payments for them and their collegues but all have been working throughout. I would report but would mean my oldest best friend then couldn't afford her mortgage all because her husbands company is scamming, and they have 4 kids to feed. It is bad.