To tell father to stay away (potentially triggering for some- attempted sexual abuse)

[Madre1972]

I’m not sure this is the right place but it felt like the best place to get honest responses.
I’ve recently come to terms with the fact that my upbringing was emotionally and physically abusive. It’s taken a lot of coming to terms with. It would also have been sexually abusive had I not fought him off when he woke me with his hands under my nightdress just before my 16th birthday- I’ve never told a living soul this detail.

I’ve gone NC with both of them, not hard as they weren’t massively in contact anyway.

My mother still sends cards and each time I see her handwriting I feel sick.

I am considering sending him a text to tell him to stop her making any kind of contact and if he doesn’t I will let her know why I hate him.

I guess the options are
Yanbu- text him and make it stop
YABU- she may not know, just put up with the cards

I'm so sorry that happened to you. This is such a huge issue that I think you need to work through with a professional such as a therapist. Please speak to someone in real life about this. [FLOWRRS]

So sorry OP. Could you not just return the cards to sender? ‘Not at this address’ type of thing... I’m only suggesting that so it has as little impact on you as possible... contacting him/them may cause more upset for you.

But if you feel like you want to call him out, then absolutely do what you think is right...