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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ainu?? Cancellation of holiday.

53 replies

Hippoh · 19/09/2020 18:15

Sooo.. my husbands birthday was at his sisters house, I know! Anyway our relationship had been going ok until I found out that my sil had been gossiping about my mum, when I mentioned this was unacceptable she told me that my friend and her son were no longer welcome on the holiday we had planned. She then laughed at me and told me (insults)... anyway by the end she was so upset that I questioned her and stood up for myself that I was threatened with a knife.. in front of my daughters.
She is now denying this happened, husband is a lightweight and fell asleep during most of this but my kids remember.. and remember telling mother in law off for not intervening.
So my problem is... wtf! And how do I deal with these people, I do love them but the lies they have told have impacted our kids as well as our marriage, but everything is my fault at the moment because “I cancelled the holiday that my friend was excluded from.”

OP posts:
Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 20:47

Sorry... Patrick Stewart once took on James cordon... it didn’t go well... YouTube x
No my sil was “gossiping“ about a woman who had died ten years ago, I thought that was wrong so I said so x

OP posts:
CheshireChat · 19/09/2020 20:47

Yeah, 'cause people just nod off when their siblings try and stab their spouse Hmm.

BessieSurtees · 19/09/2020 20:48

This thread is bizarre, your family dynamics are worrying, however so is your level of clarity for someone 2 years into degree level study Confused

BessieSurtees · 19/09/2020 20:49

I still haven’t got a clue what the AIBU is.

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 20:51

Ok... thanks for your help x

OP posts:
bethany39 · 19/09/2020 20:51

Have I got it OP?

Your SIL has been gossiping (to who? Saying what?) about your mum.

You said that wasn't nice to gossip about your mum.

You argued a bit.

She said "your friend X can't come on the group holiday we've arranged then" and threatened you with a cake knife?

bethany39 · 19/09/2020 20:52

All the while your DH was too pissed to notice what was happening?

JaniceBattersby · 19/09/2020 20:54

Did you not phone the police when someone tried to stab your hand in front of your kids? Confused

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 21:02

Jeez... must just be a hereditary thing - my kids have slept through a firework display (and no they weren’t pissed). Clearly I am not going to repeat any gossip, but I know.
This is why I was asking for help... I mean how do you deal with this ??

OP posts:
Daisyhut · 19/09/2020 21:08

@Hippoh

Jeez... must just be a hereditary thing - my kids have slept through a firework display (and no they weren’t pissed). Clearly I am not going to repeat any gossip, but I know. This is why I was asking for help... I mean how do you deal with this ??
When someone threatens you with a knife you phone the police.
SchrodingersImmigrant · 19/09/2020 21:08

I mean how do you deal with this ??

With someone attacking you with knife? Dropping contact.

LovingLola · 19/09/2020 21:09

So your children witnessed a row between yourself and their aunt which culminated in her threatening to stab you with a cake knife. Their father was in a drunken sleep.
How old are they?

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 21:17

Kids were 4 & 6 at the time. And if you mean drunken as in “tired and had some food and a glass of wine” - then yes my husband is clearly a drunk?
Ok, going to make it clear no more contact, but too late for police I think.
Thank you x

OP posts:
DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 19/09/2020 21:20

I've been thinking recently that I should leave my little island in the Outer Hebrides and go to the mainland more. It would be good for me I thought. Make a nice change and see much more "normal" ways of living.
Then I spent an hour or two reading Mumsnet and I think I'll stay put!

LagunaBubbles · 19/09/2020 21:22

Its not too late to phone the Police. I'm amazed you didn't.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 19/09/2020 21:24

Op, are you vulnerable?

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 21:27

@DontDribbleOnTheCarpet

I've been thinking recently that I should leave my little island in the Outer Hebrides and go to the mainland more. It would be good for me I thought. Make a nice change and see much more "normal" ways of living. Then I spent an hour or two reading Mumsnet and I think I'll stay put!
This is why I want to move ... I mean, I’m so flummoxed by this whole thing. But i do secretly think people can be forgiven for being dicks - however knife is probably too far for reconciliation of any kind. She will never live it down and I’ll never trust her. I was hoping for an answer but there isn’t one x
OP posts:
Pertella · 19/09/2020 21:36

Kids were 4 & 6 at the time

At the time..?

How old are they now?

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 21:43

Weird how their ages keep changing, don’t know how this will help but they are now 5 & 6 xx

OP posts:
Pertella · 19/09/2020 21:49

so not a recent event then.

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 21:53

It was earlier this year not this week x

OP posts:
LovingLola · 19/09/2020 21:57

What do they think about it?? Have they mentioned it since? Imagine them telling their teacher?

Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 22:04

I’m trying not to make it a big deal around them but they have talked about it occasionally, in a “that was wrong/naughty of aunt .... but let’s be unicorns now”

OP posts:
Original poster
Hippoh · 19/09/2020 22:33

@BessieSurtees

This thread is bizarre, your family dynamics are worrying, however so is your level of clarity for someone 2 years into degree level study Confused
Do you know what is more worrisome, I am in the top 5% of my cohort.
OP posts:
Noidea2114 · 19/09/2020 22:54

So if I have read this correctly you are allowing your children to be around someone who has threatened you with a knife.
Your husband is not sticking up for you.
I think the whole family is nuts.

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