To think my body is ruined

[WaffleDogg20]

I’m so fed up of feeling like my body has let me down

I ache all the time, my hips are constantly clicking from SPD with 3 children.

I have Lipoedema in my legs which mean they are so heavy, my ankles ache and my feet hurt if I wak too much.

I have tubular breasts so I have barely any breast
Tissue so I couldn’t breast feed.

I have borderline personality disorder and anxiety.

I have hidradenitis suppurativa on my inner
Thighs and it hurts so bad to sit and walk.

I’m always tired

I always ache

I’m so fed up. I’m 30 and feel 90.

I suggest considering doing things that reconnect you to your body because it sounds like you're creating a difference in your mind: there's your inner self and your outer body, and the latter has "let you down".

Maybe you need to be learning to see your self as a holistic whole again. Reconnecting with your body might include:

• Going back to your GP and discussing what you can do to manage your body aches and pains
• Yoga, pilates
• Considering taking up some kind of physical exercise like swimming or weights (discuss with GP)
• Investigate massages (if this is out of budget, check on youtube and learn to practice self massage)
• I really really hate this word but: "pampering". urgh it's a shit word but you know what I'm saying. They and make a point of once a week doing something more intensive to your body than just jumping out the shower and briskly toweling off. You dont have to do the whole package, it's better to just pick one thing so you actually do it: could be full body moisturising, could be a hair mask, could be filing nails and doing cuticle oil.

The point of all this is to stop seeing your body as a knackered old vehicle that ferries your mind around but actually a part of you that needs as much care as your mind.

Good luck.

@GoldfishParade I LOVE your post. Amazing.

I was going to suggest yoga or Pilates. Speak to your GP. I have arthritis in my foot which often makes me feel 85 and I'm always looking for comfortable footwear which isn't frumpy.

The above is actually great advice. Listen to it.

I would start by seeing a physio regarding your hips. If you can afford it,go private. It's usually £35 per session but obviously varies. I had an issue with my hips after having DS and the physio fixed it in one session.

Can you try something like yoga/pilates to build strength and maybe some walking for exercise? Your body should start to feel stronger and you'll feel less tired.

Check your diet too -enough fruit/veg? Maybe a multivitamin might help.

Ultimately though, your body has successfully grown three children! That's amazing!

I still feel twinges from SPD, youngest is 7.

I started going to an osteopath when hre was a few months old and my mobility was still significantly compromised. My pelvis twists easily and muscle tension builds up and pulls my body out of alignment. If it is viable to go, it really does make a difference.

Getting referred to physio through the NHS would also be helpful.

Gently doing yoga/ pliates (you might have to avoid wide movements) would build up strength, muscle and confidence in what your body can do. I managed to take up running which is brilliant for giving yourself something to be proud of.

Make sure you have decent bras of a good fit. Style matters.

Nourish yourself with good food.

Look after yourself. Have a long bath. Massage yourself after. Little things do help.

Some really good advice on here, but just to add try taking glucosamine. Easy to buy in Boots etc, and it really helped my joints. My DF who is 79 has taken it for years, thus avoiding any hip/knee replacements.

Are you getting any treatment for the things you have mentioned ?

Google 'autophagy' and 16:8 with Gin Stevens. Sounds like you need a health reset to get you feeling more positive about your body and back to yourself.
The fact that you can't walk without pain is a real shame, as walking would have been a good start. What would improve the condition on your thighs?
Do you see a hormone specialist for the lymphoedema?

When I felt disconnected from my body and depressed, a friend recommended reiki. I booked a session. Wow it was amazing, I felt whole again and happy for the first time in a while. I started learning it to use on myself. Its changed my life for the better.

Speak to your GP about referrals to help you with these things you shouldn't have to live like this! It's utterly demoralising for you.

@Beautiful3 cam you talk more about your experience with reiki? I've been wanting to try this but always postpone thinking maybe it's just kind of "airy fairy". But now you've got me thinking again

I had SPD that continued after pregnancy and just got worse - really limited my mobility. about 3 years ago (11 yrs after preg) I went to an Osteopath and we worked out that it was the Pelvic GIrdle that needed work (and all the muscles that work to keep it in place) so I would suggest some Osteo sessions and something that works on core strength such as pilates or yoga to start off with. It has made a massive difference to me

I’m going to get flamed for this I know - but it might be worth thinking about whether you need to lose some weight - if you have an increased bmi? hidroadenitis, lymphoedema and often pelvic pain can be associated with being overweight and would likely worsen your symptoms. I know I’ll likely get some angry replies but it’s true 🤷‍♀️

I don’t have lymphedema I have Lipoedema which isn’t weight related.

I really could do with losing some weight. It’s such a roundabout though because I can’t move much/run/walk far.

Thank you all! Really helpful advice. Just feeling sorry for myself. Ache a lot today and my butt hurts 😂🙈😩

And pelvic pain, Iv had it since my oldest 13 years ago, I was a lot slimmer back then. It seems like my hip “clicks out of place” and I have to open my legs wide to click it back 😩

@WaffleDogg20

And pelvic pain, Iv had it since my oldest 13 years ago, I was a lot slimmer back then. It seems like my hip “clicks out of place” and I have to open my legs wide to click it back 😩

I have hypermobility through joints, do you have this too? I also had horrendous SPD I was housebound. Went from working out every day to not being able to walk. 2 years on I'm still in rehab and in that time I've got bulging discs. What fun!

You really really need to work on core stabilisation exercises to support your pelvis. If the ligaments and muscles aren't strong they aren't able to support the additional movement in your pelvis. I would recommend you see a physio to help you with these. The correct allignment is critical. You can fight this and get improvements but it's a tough slog. I really do sympathise

You will feel better when you lose weight, it has physical and psychological benefits. I know it's not popular on here to suggest that but all the exercises in the world wont help you if your diet isn't healthy. Join weightwatchers or similar , you will meet others and it can help to pep you up a little .
For the SPD seek real medical advice .
OP I totally get the feeling of your body being destroyed by kids, I'm am older mim and feel like I've been fast forwarded into old age in a way my child free friends aren't!

I have tubular breasts too OP. I had a normal boob job 10 years ago and now I've breast fed 2 kids they are completely deformed, even more than before.

It's horrific and depressing and something no one understands. I have hated my body because of this my whole life.

So no help from me, just understanding

Anything that helps you feel good about yourself is going to help.

I had really, really bad trapped nerve in my back a few years ago. Was really frightened as I could hardly get out of bed. Went to see private Sports Injury specialist (it was The Medical) - who reviewed everything I did and general health as well.

They offered either pressure massage or acupuncture. After that I kind of reviewed the way I moved completely. Original injury had actually been done when I took the bins out one day and just jerked suddenly.

I've been pain free since the treatment.

If you can't do a lot of exercise and want to lose weight I'd suggest intermittent fasting. There is a board here on mn for it. It will be good for inflammation too.

Spd is awful and I sympathise. Can you get a belt that you wear around your hip area to help stabilise it? I'd see a physio too, that's really important.

As far as exercise goes pool exercises would be really gentle.

I feel the same btw. I'm mid thirties with children and I feel like I've been chopped up and mashed back together. Like a beaten up barbie doll. My spd was so bad during pregnancy I couldn't walk.

I'm trying to mediate in the evenings, use a vaporiser in my room with oils (the scent is calming), having physio, going for walks and doing things like a hair treatment/skin treatment.

www.healthandcare.co.uk/maternity-support-belts.html