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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU nursery loosing all clothing

28 replies

Nickjames · 19/09/2020 01:03

Hi all
Just looking for some advice as the nursery that my son goes to has lost 3 sets of clothes and my sons only pair of shoes today (2 pairs which they asked us to bring in so that they could keep and change his clothes when needed, all named as well and the pair he was wearing when he went in today) I’ve already seen some other posts about some parents picking things up by accident etc but at the moment parents aren’t allowed into the nursery so I’d assume his cloths going missing would be entirely the nurserys fault. It seems likely that they have given his clothes to other children to wear home as he was wearing someone else’s cloths when we picked him up including another child’s welly’s that were clearly named.

Does anyone think it would be unreasonable to try and bill the nursery for this lack of care if they are unable to find the clothing considering it’s almost £80 worth of stuff?

OP posts:
Feelingconfused2020 · 19/09/2020 01:10

I haven't voted. I think billing them is extreme. I think complaining to them is appropriate though. It's a disgrace. I think billing them will get you a reputation and won't help.

In future (and I'm.not saying this to blame.you) maybe think about buying charity shop clothes for nursery as they're notorious for losing clothes.

Please follow this up though, those clothes must be somewhere!!

GrumpyHoonMain · 19/09/2020 01:14

Definitely bill them. What’s the point of naming clothes as requested when they’re just giving kids anything they can find? Maybe your invoice will get them to re-evaluate their policies. For some people even losing charity shop clothes would be a huge hit to their budget.

OwlinaTree · 19/09/2020 01:30

Losing the shoes would really annoy me. I think I could cope with losing clothes but not shoes.

TheChiefJo · 19/09/2020 01:30

Yeah, bill them. They ask for sufficient kit for the kid, understandably, but must look after it. Do they think you have three disposable outfits per day?

Susannahmoody · 19/09/2020 01:40

Find a new nursery, ridiculous

HardJustGotHarder · 19/09/2020 01:43

Always put your child in the cheapest clothes for nursery

The nursery wont pay

snitzelvoncrumb · 19/09/2020 02:28

Don't bring any more spare clothes for a while, they won't replace them. If shoes are missing don't leave until they have found them.

avamiah · 19/09/2020 02:41

Feelingconfused2020,
Buying charity shop clothes ??
Are you stupid ?
Why should OP have to buy second hand clothes for her son to attend nursery in ?
Get a grip for gods sake.
Clothes do not just go missing, somebody has obviously stolen them .
Report it to the manager to start with .

beingmums · 19/09/2020 03:25

Bill them. I would not be happy if someone lost my child's shoes! These are expensive!

VeggieSausageRoll · 19/09/2020 03:29

What did they say when you picked him up?

Torvean32 · 19/09/2020 03:36

What are the nursery doing regarding soiled clothes just now?

I dont think the nursery will pay for missing clothes.

Children should wear older clothes to nursery provided they fit. They are guaranteed to get dirt/mud/paint/glue etc over them.
Children ( if old enough) will frequently swap clothes if they prefer what their friend is wearing.

beingmums · 19/09/2020 03:39

@Torvean32

What are the nursery doing regarding soiled clothes just now?

I dont think the nursery will pay for missing clothes.

Children should wear older clothes to nursery provided they fit. They are guaranteed to get dirt/mud/paint/glue etc over them.
Children ( if old enough) will frequently swap clothes if they prefer what their friend is wearing.

I think I would be most annoyed with shoes not the clothes but if they got missing daily. I would not be happy.
Torvean32 · 19/09/2020 03:41

@snitzelvoncrumb

Don't bring any more spare clothes for a while, they won't replace them. If shoes are missing don't leave until they have found them.
If you dont bring spare clothes I'm assuming you're ok with your child wearing underwear all day.

With the shoes , if staff are aware then im assuming they've checked the nursery. It will take time to check with parents though as not all children attend every day.
I'm sorry , but if i still worked at a nursery and you said i couldn't go home til your kids shoes were found i would laugh at you and leave.

snitzelvoncrumb · 19/09/2020 04:34

Torv they will have a box of lost clothes they can use for kids that don't bring spare ones. I wouldn't give them the opportunity to lose more. With the shoes I would massively inconvenience the staff by expecting them to look for them while I waited, because they can't just lock you in the centre and leave. If they have to stay late after work they will be less likely to lose them.

timeforanew · 19/09/2020 05:33

in 10 years of school/nursery combined (2 kids), we lost 1 white PE sock.
I would be ok with the occasional item of clothing missing, but your nursery is taking the piss. They clearly don’t give a shit (they know this is unacceptable, so they must be incredibly chaotic when nobody sees it), so I would move my child.

VEGAS2016 · 19/09/2020 08:45

Im in the same position Hmm in the last week they have lost 2 hoodies, a long sleeved top & a pair of joggers! Im not bloody made of money ffs. Ive emailed them & asked on collecting still no clothes its starting to piss me off!!

Nottherealslimshady · 19/09/2020 08:53

How?! The staff must be taking them surely, they're the only people with access. I'd complain to the manager and insist they get returned or you'll be billing them.

Moomum123 · 19/09/2020 08:55

If everything is labelled and in a named bag then there is no excuse. I’m shocked they could lose shoes, and would be asking how? I work in a preschool, and if children need changing because they’re wet or messy, we take their bag, change them and put the wet clothes in a plastic bag back in their own bag. There’s no chance of putting their stuff in someone else’s bag. For kids who don’t have a change of clothes we have a box of old/ donated clothes - they might have a former attendee’s name in if they have been donated but we would never “borrow” another child’s clothes or shoes. Definitely raise it with the manager.

CoffeeBeansGalore · 19/09/2020 08:55

Doesn't help with the clothes, but can you send your child to nursery in Doodles/plimsolls/cheap trainers? Better to lose those than expensive shoes.

I used to send mine in cheaper outfits so it didn't matter so much if they got stained. Never lost main clothes permanently though. Only the odd sock or pair of tights went missing.

LouiseTrees · 19/09/2020 08:56

Our nursery has a parents Facebook closed group. Not everyone is on there but if you have something similar you could complain to the nursery but then ask the other parents who’s clothes you have and ask for yours back.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 19/09/2020 09:01

Doodles are £20-30 so hardly the cheap option. How old is your child? Are they old enough to take any care of their belongings. We found that a cardigan might go astray if taken off because hot, but a change of clothes due to getting wet/dirty required adult assistance and would mean soiled/wet clothes were returned reliably.

I would complain than £80 worth of clothes/shoes are yet to be returned to you and ask nursery to find them, including by asking other parents, and ask that they improve their procedures on this.

NailsNeedDoing · 19/09/2020 09:03

You won’t get very far with trying to charge them, but if mentioning it to the staff and asking them to look doesn’t help, then I’d email the manager with a list of what has gone missing with as much detail of as you can remember and say that you have received clothes belonging to other children. Ask how they’re going to rectify the problem and prevent it happening again. It might even be worth mentioning a concern about cross infection considering we’re in a pandemic and children shouldn’t be swapping things between them.

Burnthurst187 · 19/09/2020 09:11

If it was a one off I could understand it but there must be some shortcomings at your nursery for so much to have now gone missing. Esp as it's named items

We bought DD her second ever pair of shoes two weeks ago, they were either £26 or £36 I can't remember but if they went missing I would be very unhappy and would be speaking to the manager

TinySleepThief · 19/09/2020 09:19

It would seriously annoy me and I can see why you would eb tempted to bill them.

Why bother labelling clothing if they are going to use anyones clothes even if clearly labelled.

I would be emailing the nursery asking how its possible to mix children's clothing up. I've never seen a nursery that doesn't grab the childs bag change their clothes and then put the dirty clothes back in the bag.

If he was wearing clothing belonging to another child then it's obviously a failure on their part so yes I do think its fair to take it up with management.

Pobblebonk · 19/09/2020 09:31

You can bill them as much as you like, it doesn't mean that they'll pay. I suspect your contract terms absolve them from liability.