DP’s nephew

[Caitlin555]

Maybe this is because he isn’t my child, or my actual family, but it does grate on me the obsession with DP’s family’s towards his nephew. I realise this sounds very mean! But every single visit (they live in a different country), event etc is focused on this child. He is the first grandchild so that is probably why as well.

When we go out to visit DP family it is obviously time off work for us etc and I find it totally exhausting that the time revolves around when we are going to see nephew, activities with nephew, nephew staying with DP parents overnight which means we have a toddler there the whole time. DP enjoys playing with him but doesn’t want to get involved in childcare!

I find it so draining having to be ‘silly’ all the time - nephew is nearly 3 so not old enough for a proper conversation, it’s all about stupid voices and making him laugh. Have to watch him constantly. I can’t relax and I didn’t sign up for that!!

God I realise this sounds awful but AIBU to find this draining?

Will I become more maternal with my own kids??

We are mid 30s and don’t have children yet!

YABU

Also, how often can the above be happening if they live in a different country?

Can’t you invite your OH parents to yours for dinner one evening?

@OverTheRainbow88

YABU

Also, how often can the above be happening if they live in a different country?

Can’t you invite your OH parents to yours for dinner one evening?

We go there a few times a year.

I just can’t imagine if we had kids that I would expect my DP’s brother and wife to spend all their time with our child when they visited! Or that they’d want to see constant photos of them!

I did think I am probably BU - maybe I’m just hormonal and grumpy

No yanbu. Can you not plan a few days out yourself? Just you and DH and then come back in the evening.

You are not being unreasonable. Other people’s children, especially golden children, are immensely tedious. Actually, that’s probably not fair. The kids are probably alright but the fawning adults, they’re immensely tedious.

@Sanpro

You are not being unreasonable. Other people’s children, especially golden children, are immensely tedious. Actually, that’s probably not fair. The kids are probably alright but the fawning adults, they’re immensely tedious.

This is it! The golden child!

I suppose I know as well that any child we have won’t be anywhere near as golden as the novelty will have worn off but maybe that’s a good thing

Totally get it! Doesn't sound mean or awful to me! some kids are just a pain in the arse and when you can't just walk away of course they will grate on you

DP nephew is the golden child fawned all over and everything bloody revolves around him whilst our own kids don’t get a look in, it’s exhausting and tedious. Also as a result of this behaviour from the adults he is growing up a proper spoilt brat with shocking displays of aggression, as you can imagine this makes him hard to like.

Can't you do something with your oh and arrange to see his parents later, maybe at a time when a 3 year old is in bed.

@Bbang

DP nephew is the golden child fawned all over and everything bloody revolves around him whilst our own kids don’t get a look in, it’s exhausting and tedious. Also as a result of this behaviour from the adults he is growing up a proper spoilt brat with shocking displays of aggression, as you can imagine this makes him hard to like.

@40andginger

Totally get it! Doesn't sound mean or awful to me! some kids are just a pain in the arse and when you can't just walk away of course they will grate on you

Yes! And I just cannot imagine it happening the other way around.