AIBU to consider putting my daughter on the pill (PMS- not contraception!)

[flippertygibblet]

My daughter is nearly 14 & started her periods 3 years ago. All was fine to begin with, however, for the last 12mths or so she has started to get very low & emotional just before her period & on the first day or so. More recently it seems to be getting worse. For the rest of the month she's perfectly happy, I'm not concerned there is anything else going on that is upsetting her as it is literally just those few days around her period. Yesterday she was sobbing, a lot worse than usual & she insisted she didn't know why she was crying, she seemed yo calm down a little but I could tell she was feeling down & this morning she looked like she was ready to burst into tears. It breaks my heart seeing her like that especially when there is noth8i can do to make her feel better. I have never suffered in this way with my periods so have no experience of this. I've googled & there were suggestions of the pill being helpful but I am a bit concerned to go down this route, especially with her being so young. Any advice would be amazing!

Wow, chocolate and rom-coms as a cure for premenstrual dysphoric disorder eh? Let's call Cadbury's and Jennifer Aniston immediately!

What a load of dismissive, sexist bullshit.

OP, do take your DD to the GP - they may well be able to do something that doesn't involve the Pill at all. A friend of mine had similar symptoms (at the age of 37) and it turns out she was just deficient in certain vitamins. She's lucky to have a DM who is taking this seriously - I wish I'd had one like you when I was that age. I hope she can get this sorted out soon.

I wouldn’t put hormones in her body for 2 days of being sad, doesn’t seem worth it

There is evidence that Agnus Castus can help PMS (more so than evening primrose oil) and it definitely helped me. I would suggest trying that before the pill. You should be aware though that it can increase fertility so you need to explain this to her and point out that contraception will be even more important if and when she starts having sex.

Useful info on treatment options for PMS at www.pms.org.uk/app/uploads/2018/06/guidelinesfinal60210.pdf

Feeling like shit for a few days a month may be common but doesn't mean it should be accepted if there's an alternative. Why should she suffer if there is an easy way not to?

Yes, she should be aware that the pill can have side effects, but so does not taking it. Help her get a doctor's appt and let her consider all options.

FWIW I never had PMS until I was in my 40s, but did take the pill from 15 because I was falling unconscious from period pain each month.

I put myself on the pill at 14 without my mums knowledge to deal with my heavy periods and my skin.

I think a chat with a nice female GP is the way to go. They won’t prescribe the pill if they don’t think it’s necessary and beneficial.

Have a look at some of the stories from woman in their 20s plus who got on the pill in there teens and are now suffering ill effects.... the pill is the easy route that gets hard later.

I went on the pill at 13 or 14 for a combination of horrendous acne and awful periods (lasting 2 weeks, painful, what is probably endometriosis) and I’m so glad my mother was supportive and open to it. I remember my grandmother and older aunt being horrified, I think it’s just the idea of someone so young being on contraception but I’m really glad my mother supported me. I think they viewed it as some kind of license to have sex which was bonkers (that happened years later!)

It took a few tries to find the right one, but I’ve been on it ever since (I’m 28 now) with no problems and it’s really really helped.

I'd have probably blown a gasket if someone suggested 'choccies and a rom-com' for my PMS. Yes, all women need is sugar and a 'weepie / impossibly good looking man falls for impossibly good looking woman and have the kind of life you're vanishingly unlikely to experience' 90 minutes of tosh. Poof! There goes my pain, anxiety, headaches, acne & rages. All cured by Milk Tray & Mr Darcy.

Bollocks.

Op, the pill is certainly worth considering, chat to your gp about it and see what they suggest.
Dd started the combined pill last year aged 13 and then switched to the mini pill at the start of this year. She suffers with horrendously heavy periods which last over 2 weeks, being investigated for endometriosis.
I will say that she has suffered with extreme mood swings since starting the pill and has also put weight on. I would advise the pill as a last resort as with all medication, the side effects can be awful.

Thank you everyone, very interesting to read different opinions, has definitely given me some things to think about.

I wish someone had told me that the pill can reduce pmt symptoms. It really used to mess with my head. I couldnt not belive the difference when I started using hormonal contraception. Such a difference to my quality of life.

Pill sounds like a good idea . she can also take the pill continuously and not get a period at all. It’s completely safe to do so. Many many GPs recommend this as there is no need at all to have a break each month.