Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to leave DD2 at home next time?!

11 replies

Funkyslippers · 15/09/2020 20:01

DD2(11)'s attitude stinks at times. We took DDs out for tea tonight and the whole time DD2 was sulky, touchy and downright rude at times. For example OH and I asked how her day was at school. She replied "rubbish!" and we then said "oh, what was rubbish about it?" DD2: (rolls her eyes) "It just was OK? I hate school so just STOP ASKING ABOUT IT!!!!" Every time OH dared to breathe in a way she could hear it, she would say "stoooooop" at him. She even told me to stop something and I genuinely don't know what I did. She would find fault in everything we said or did pretty much and threw a massive strop when told to put her phone down. I told her throughout the meal to stop being so rude but it just wounder her up even more. As a result I feel I've paid £30 to have a totally rubbish time because of her behaviour. DD1 (17)was getting upset by it too. So WIBU to say if she can't behave herself she can stay at home next time? She clearly did not appreciate being taken out for dinner and would have been happy to stay at home and eat Quorn nuggets lol.

For context, she can be nice at times but does have serious attitude issues...

OP posts:
CloudSingsAloud · 15/09/2020 20:07

Depends. Why was she acting like that?
She wanted to stay home so acted up so next time you'll leave her home?
If she doesn't like school, why did you take her out for a treat and then ask her about it?

Funkyslippers · 15/09/2020 20:24

She does like school, she'd probably just had a bad day and it was the first I'd heard about it. She never said she didn't want to come out either.

OP posts:
NotMaryWhitehouse · 15/09/2020 20:26

Age and hormones! It is definitely infuriating when it's happening, but I think you just have to ignore it and hope that they grow out of it sooner rather than later!

Funkyslippers · 15/09/2020 20:32

NotMaryWhitehouse God I hope that is the case as it gives me hope that it is only natural and she will grow out of it!!!

OP posts:
AmICrazyorWhat2 · 15/09/2020 20:39

I feel your pain, OP! Neither of mine (15 & 12) like to do things as a family right now...so we leave them at home!

Now, if it’s one-to-one time with a parent, doing something they want to do, that’s totally different. Then they’re lovely.🤣

ButteryPuffin · 15/09/2020 20:44

I would put some other consequence in place for that level of rudeness, about something she actually cared about - phone, wi fi etc.

Lollypop701 · 15/09/2020 20:47

Mine want to eat nice food and go home as quickly as possible.... so keep asking the time, when are we going. I generally order another cocktail when they do, and smile. Ive never allowed phones at a table so they never take them out ... they are learning slowly to be nice! Personally I’d take her and ignore... no pudding if she’s not a good girl though!

Thisischocolate · 15/09/2020 20:47

No words of wisdom as my DC isn't at that age yet, but I am curious as to why these days rudeness in teenagers is so easily passed off as hormones and that parents should just ride it out.

Maybe understanding of the impact of hormones on behaviour has changed, or I had very intolerant parents, but I would never had dared to behave in such a way because of the consequences.

Ispini · 15/09/2020 21:12

I find that asking my DDs to hand over their phone after being rude and obnoxious works wonders. My eldest refused so my DH cut off her WiFi. We seldom have issues now. Find their currency, cut it off and stick to what you say.
We have a much happier and content household.
Sometimes I think teens think they are so hard done by, I’m guilty of spoiling mine and now we have had to regroup as they were being awful. We now have a happier household. I was always threatening and never carrying the threats out - big mistake. I’m a teacher and have to say it’s easier to discipline a class of thirty than your own kids! Strange but true. Good luck!

Metothee · 15/09/2020 21:17

Could be hormones, could just be her personality? My sister was the same growing up. Always sulking over nothing. We laugh looking back on family photos as she always has a face like a slapped arse - Christmas/birthdays/family get togethers - you name it, she ruined it!

She's 30 now and while not too bad (in small doses) she can still be hard work depending on her mood...

hettie · 15/09/2020 21:29

Has she just started in year 7? Not an excuse but might explain a tired overwrought child? She sounds on edge/or rude. Is it new behaviour?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread