What's the absolute latest a child should go to nursery?

[monsterad]

My son used to go to nursery one day a week from the age of about 15 months old until February this year when he turned two and when covid happened.

I'm currently undergoing IVF treatment so have decided to keep him out of nursery. I'm slightly concerned as to whether this will affect his development and potentially make him behind when it comes to going to school.

Hopefully we'll be able to have him back in Nursery when he's three.

Never?

Looking at my children, going to nursery later was correlated with a smoother start to school, better academics and better social skills.
Sample size of only three though!

Never. I’ve taught children who have only been cared for by their parents. They were absolutely fine

But totally fine to need a break too. Do what works for you.

What about kids who may be behind on speech. Isn't nursery good for that especially if no siblings at home

@HP2020 my twins were speech delayed and were in a SALT class for infant school. They were both in nursery from 8 months, DS3 didn't go to nursery at all and has no problems with speech whatsoever.

So, anecdotally, based on my kids, it makes no difference

Both of my DDs didn't start until they were 3. I was going to several play groups a week though so this helped with development. I think you'll need to help bridge the gap some how.

My eldest 3 never went, all grown into nicely rounded well educated adults with careers and a dedication to volunteering in the youth sector.

Don't think it matters massively as long as they get stimulus and encouragement at home instead.

Some kids never do it’s up to you. I would recommend it just for getting them used to being away from the home and you.

They don't need to at all. That is why reception year is called reception - it is a gentle introduction to school (and for some children, to being away from home at all).

I think it's great at 3 because they are monsters at 3 and it's useful to have a break :o

I don’t plan on sending my son until preschool at 3, and then only for 3 hour sessions, because they are free and it will give me some one to one time with my daughter. I’m sure he would be fine not going at all though!

I think 3 or at least a full year before starting school at a minimum.

I wouldn't stress about nursery as you have more important things going on, I've been on the IVF journey. My DD went to the local nursey at 2 1/2 for 2 mornings then at 3 1/2 started nursery attached to pre-prep for 3 mornings and upped to 4 mornings plus one afternoon the last term before starting in reception. DD settled into reception straight away.

@Dobbyismyfavourite

I wouldn't stress about nursery as you have more important things going on, I've been on the IVF journey. My DD went to the local nursey at 2 1/2 for 2 mornings then at 3 1/2 started nursery attached to pre-prep for 3 mornings and upped to 4 mornings plus one afternoon the last term before starting in reception. DD settled into reception straight away.

Thank you x

I know lots of children go from very young out of necessity but if the option is there I would always prefer to send children when they are communicative and can speak to you properly. Also preferably potty trained but that's just me, I don't think it's absolutely necessary.

My DD started pre school at 3.5 and I was considering sending my son who is nearly 3, but think I will wait til he is almost 4 next September. That is still a full year before he starts school.

I suppose I think very young children do best at home, and for me pre school is great for preparing them for the fact that they have to go to school. I don't mean that nursery isn't beneficial, just that I don't think children who get that extra time at home miss out significantly.

@CloudyVanilla

I know lots of children go from very young out of necessity but if the option is there I would always prefer to send children when they are communicative and can speak to you properly. Also preferably potty trained but that's just me, I don't think it's absolutely necessary.

My DD started pre school at 3.5 and I was considering sending my son who is nearly 3, but think I will wait til he is almost 4 next September. That is still a full year before he starts school.

I suppose I think very young children do best at home, and for me pre school is great for preparing them for the fact that they have to go to school. I don't mean that nursery isn't beneficial, just that I don't think children who get that extra time at home miss out significantly.

Another consideration is, my son is potty trained but he's always had me or daddy to ask for the loo, I want him to know he can ask any adult! Maybe I'm worried for nothing.

I assume he'll ask another adult at nursery when he does finally go back!

When the option of funding for 2-year-olds came in it was explicitly for children from disadvantaged backgrounds or with additional needs, and the Early Years staff have been reporting back to us on how much it has been reducing the difference in attainment for those children.

Up until that point (about 5 years ago?) it hadn't occurred to anyone to view nursery as anything other than childcare for children under three.

If your son is getting stimulation and experiences at home (nursery rhymes, sitting at the table and so on) then he won't be "behind" at three.

This is a really hard question to answer as no parents really have kids with experiences at either end of the go early/go late spectrum. Our DC went they were both 13 months (at different times) and both have developed behaviours that we could possibly contribute to nursery time but we will never know. Our DC1 is very very clever, but we don't know whether that is due to stimulation from mixing with other children or something that's innate (I'm not being fat headed there, DC1 is very astute). DC2 is clever in different ways but also only had about 2 months at nursery before lockdown. She may end up the same as DC1 but if she did we could attribute her development less to nursery and more to nature (over nuture). Very inarticulately the point I am making is you will definitely see a development in your child if they go to nursery but if that's at 3 or 8 months etc is up to you.

you will definitely see a development in your child if they go to nursery but if that's at 3 or 8 months etc is up to you.

But that depends very much on the home experience.
I couldn't see any advantages of sending my kids to nursery- all their needs were being met without that environment.

@speakout
Yes I agree. Having seen many children come into reception over the years, it is the quality of their environment (home or childcare) that made the difference. At that age language development is crucial and to a very large degree that’s about the adult interactions the child has rather than peers. That’s not to say childcare is bad at all. But some of the brightest children I’ve taught have been the children of bright women who are SAHMs who talk to their children. Nursery isn’t essential for development by any means.

[quote Thenneverendingstorohree]@speakout
Yes I agree. Having seen many children come into reception over the years, it is the quality of their environment (home or childcare) that made the difference. At that age language development is crucial and to a very large degree that’s about the adult interactions the child has rather than peers. That’s not to say childcare is bad at all. But some of the brightest children I’ve taught have been the children of bright women who are SAHMs who talk to their children. Nursery isn’t essential for development by any means.[/quote]
Phew!

My DD will be starting reception next year and she's just started going 3 days a week. She's only been going since last week but she's doing well, she's not behind, she is a little shy and the first drop off was difficult but I'm not sure going from a younger age would have made any difference

Mine went to a childminder from 20 months, and playgroups, no nursery. I looked at nurseries but the childminder was a better fit at the time, then he was happy so I didn't see the need to move him. He settled in fine at school as one of the youngest in the year.

3 will be fine. Sort of depends when your child's birthday is. One school year of preschool would work, so sept - July before they start school.

My dds both went part time from 3.5 and I think that is absolutely fine. It’s good to have a nursery year before school but mine started mornings only two days a week and we built up over the year.