to expect my DH to volunteer to give up his football game to look after DS if I am poorly ?

[rookiemum]

Just a rant really.

I'm feeling groggy and unwell. This is my day off but I have managed to get DS into the cms during the day as I didn't feel up to looking after him.

Before we knew that the CM could take DS, Dh didn't offer to take the day off work, which to be fair I wouldn't have taken him up on as he is a contractor so time is money.

However he has a football match after work which means he won't be home until after 7.00. I would have liked him to at least volunteer to cancel this if required. I asked if he would and he looked really upset, he has a big lads weekend this coming Saturday and they play a football game on the Sunday so he wants to get the practice.

As he was leaving this morning he touched my forehead and went "OOh you really aren't well you are very hot and clammy"

AMBU ?

no i love a good rant would give him a kick when my dh is sick as in the sniffles the world has to stop but if im sick he is nowhere to be found grrrunbu!!

No No No you are being totally reasonable.

No, YANBU - I would have given him a kick up the arse and made sure he felt guilty enough not to go to football!

Thank you, I think I shan't do the dinner tonight and make a big point of being in bed when he comes back.

sounds like a good plan

YANBU - Tell him to stay home and if he still doesn't get the message, cry.

Tell him gently but firmly: You can't go to the football tonight because I'm ill and there's noone to look after the DC.
If he then manages to arrange (off his own bat) for someone else ie his mum, your mum etc to come and look after the DC so you can go to bed then that's acceptable, but ignoring the fact that you are ill is not.

now i have had this problem in the past but once i explained to my dh how ill i was and how hard it was to look after the children while ill he understood and has never complained since!!.....though saying that i feel sooooooo ill today and wanted hubby to try and come home early but he'd agreed to let someone else go home already as he didn't need them really....but i'd text him asking before 8am!!! he didn't send this other person home till 11am!!! grrrrrr !!!!

and to top it all off he's swapped his days off tomorrow and the kids have a birthday party to go to, if i'm not well then the poor things wont get to go as daddy is too busy helping everyone else out and not us!!!

i know exactly how you feel love- you are defo NBU!!!!

Thanks madamez but my mums on holiday, otherwise I would have got her to come here and I can't really ask any of the neighbours as they have kids to and we all know that bedtime is the difficult time of the day.

I'm not falling over in the street ill so I will probably be ok to do Ds bedtime. It's just the lack of consideration that gets me.

If he had offered to give up his game I would have said that I would try to manage without him because I know its important to him.