Dd friends mum at school

[StormsDontLastForever]

Dd is in primary school, has a friend in her class who's mum offered to take me to school and back last year as I don't drive, was very nice of her, I paid petrol contribution etc, but I found she was a user, she was constantly asking me to look after her child etc (I don't mind helping people out but she took the p**s). So during lockdown etc I never heard from her at all, she drove past me once and stopped for 2 seconds then again never heard anything. So school started back and I made my own way up and down. My friend also has children in the school and stays near me and she had offered several times to take me up to school etc, so I accepted. Then the other mum had started asking me if I wanted a lift etc, I made excuses etc as I don't class her as a friend and I'm not just going to use someone to take me up to school and back (if that makes sense). On Friday at home time she said she would pick me up on Monday morning to take me to school. Aibu to rejected her offer? What excuse can I have? I have anxiety and don't like upsetting people so don't want to tell her it's because I think she is a user 🙄

Just say "no thanks I'm all sorted"

Just tell her you've made alternative arrangements and thank you kindly for the offer.

She told me on Friday "I will get you on Monday" and walked away before I had chance to reply. So I need to message her today with an excuse for tomorrow morning 🙈

Just say thank you that’s a kind offer, but I’m sorted now.

No one should be upset.

Just say I didn't get a chance to tell you on Friday but I have a lift arranged... so no need to bother yourself,Thanks a lot

I know what you mean op. I used to be so afraid to say things like they were, to people I wasn't close to.
It's a silly way to be though.

Shes not really going to care. Unless it really is all for the free childcare she gets from you and in that case she's a user so.... no need to feel bad.

Just text something breezy like - Hi xxxx meant to mention on Friday but you’d gone before I could explain, I’m ok for a lift now but thanks for offering, really do appreciate it.

Thank you everyone.

In the mornings I need to walk up though as my friend takes me up at finishing time as she has other children to drop off in the morning. So I would be walking up to school the same way the other mum drives so she may see me walking.

Sorry I know it seems a petty thing to some to be worried about but in my head it's a big deal as don't want to upset anyone and be the talk of the school

Just message and say "thanks for the offer on the mornings but actually I really the walk. See you at school"

enjoy the walk

Cut and paste this:

Dear x, thanks for the offer of a lift but there is no need as I have sorted school pick ups and drop offs for this year. See you at school.

Tell her you're walking by choice for the exercise or enjoying the time with dd.

OP The only person you’re likely to upset is this not-friend. No-one else. And how would it work being the ‘talk of the school’? She’d say ‘OP didn’t want a lift from me’ and anyone else would say ‘oh, really’ and move the conversation on. Not-friend would be the one looking odd if she kept on about it.

Just tell her no thanks, you enjoy the walk in the morning and that maybe you’ll take her up on her offer when the weather worsens.

new fitness regime - good way of getting exercise

In that case just text words along the lines of - meant to mention on Friday but we’re ok for a lift now. Tbh we’re enjoying walking to school, think lockdown has made us appreciate the outdoors a lot more. My friend lives near and will be running us home, really do appreciate your offer though. See you at school.

Just say "Sorry you left so quickly on Friday I didn't get a chance to reply, no need to collect me tomorrow thanks, I'm quite enjoying the walks so I want to keep it up. Thanks for the offer, see you at school"

Tell her you are trying to loose lockdown weight by walking.

Just tell her that you enjoy the walk up and that your sorted for the way back

I'd say I was trying to get the kids into good habits of walking where possible as it's good exercise. Nothing wrong with that at all!

I think once you’ve sent the text you will feel a whole lot better. I can sometimes be a over thinker so can sympathise.

Thank you everyone for the advice. I will send her a message shortly and hope all goes well 🤞🏼

I would say that you are making an effort to get more exercise and get your steps up so relish the walk to school each day. Don't feel bad, you have no reason to.

I'm the same as you OP but WHY do we need to give a reason!
I'd go with the exercise excuse though

@StormsDontLastForever good luck!