To think staff in acute Mental Health wards should take into account a persons age

[thedaywewillremeber]

Ds is 25 and since he was 19 has been admitted on and off to our local adult acute ward. He says they expect him to behave in the same as way as the patients who are twenty plus years older. Aibu to think they should take into account that a person in their 20’s will likely be at a different stage emotionally,socially and life experience wise.

I'm not quite sure what you mean? Can you give some examples?

Well, a 25 year old is an adult. As is a 45 year old.
I thought you were going to say he felt he was being treated like a child, when he wasn't one.
Can you explain what he means?

I'd expect there to be clear guidelines on how everyone should behave regardless of age.

They should treat everyone as individuals in accordance with their needs.

He means they expect him to have the same emotional maturity as someone significantly older and also similar interests.

Yes, everyone should be treated as individuals. But I can't think in what ways 45 year olds would be expected to behave differently to 25 year olds? Do you mean the usual expectation that patients should go to their room by midnight, for example?

But 25 year olds are well and truly adults? I appreciate it is difficult for, say, 19 year olds in adult services but at 25 yes I wouldn’t expect differential treatment.

I was certainly treated no differently at work at 25 than much much older colleagues.

what kind of interests? You mean he should like Oasis not KPop?

How are they treating him? What is it that is making him/you unhappy?

Hmm..well many older people won't have good emotional maturity due to their mental illness, either. Can you be more specific as to how this is playing out? As for interests - well, there are a limit to what can be provided on an acute. What would he like to do that isn't available?

When I worked in mental health we expected all the patients (ages 25-83) to follow the same rules.
But their levels of maturity varied greatly, some of the older patients had less emotional maturity than the younger ones due to upbringing and sheer number of years in the system. Some of them were effectively still children. :(

@TheFormerPorpentinaScamander

When I worked in mental health we expected all the patients (ages 25-83) to follow the same rules. But their levels of maturity varied greatly, some of the older patients had less emotional maturity than the younger ones due to upbringing and sheer number of years in the system. Some of them were effectively still children. :(

Very much this- worked with a patient in her 80s who had gone into an 'institution' for unmarried mothers' in the 60s because she had got pregnant at 14. She never left this level of care as they felt her reaction to the forced removal of her baby meant she was 'mentally unwell', this lady was so childlike in her behaviours. But I significantly digress- its a subject that makes me so emotive.

Are they expecting him to follow the same social programme? It should be differentiated to an extent- I certainly had different interests at 20, to those I had at 45.

Me too @TitianaTitsling. My heart broke for some of the older patients. They just lost their whole lives, and children too some of them. If they were young now things would be so different.

What's happening specifically to cause you or him to be unhappy with the provision?

I often think OT appeals to women more than men. Certainly in my experience. I loved all the arts and crafts, relaxation and pampering but the men not so much.

They tell him you’re the same as all the others. He feels uncomfortable being social with people so much older. Yes I know he’s an adult but these a wide range of age being an adult covers.

@thedaywewillremeber

They tell him you’re the same as all the others. He feels uncomfortable being social with people so much older. Yes I know he’s an adult but these a wide range of age being an adult covers.

'same as all the others' in what context? What does he want to do?

The films etc they choose to watch are often films I would enjoy as an older adult so he says they aren’t really his thing. That’s one example and they just say “you’re all adults” they push him to attend groups and when he says he doesn’t feel comfortable and that he has nothing in common with people with such a large age gap they again say you’re all adults.

That doesn't sound great tbh. Is there any chance at all he could move to a different setting (I know beds are like gold dust).

It is really hard to arrange activities when you have such a big age range, and its so often easiest to cater to the majority. I'd often arrange movie afternoons on Sundays when i was at work (we always less staff on a Sunday so had to stay ward based as much as possible). Luckily we had 2 lounges and a 3rd room with a TV in so I could offer a selection of movies to suit them all. I did occasionally provide popcorn (out of my own money) but they had a tendency to turn up, eat it all and leave rather than actually 'engage' with the activity. My colleague used to do "name that tune" quizzes with music from every decade and genre to give them all a chance to take part.
Sadly until there is more funding, and therefore more staff to provide a variety of activities, I dont think much will change. And patients are expected to take part in activities as part of their recovery.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander That’s good that you are able to be more accommodating. I wish our local ward was

Can he not choose a film he would like? I do find it a bit strange he can't interact with people older than him. You have to at work, hobbies, DC's friends parents. It's a normal part of life. On my last ward my bestfriend was 19 and I was 35.

Well if it's like the one I visited, expecting under 30's to want to be in bed by 10pm & being snotty if they weren't was so unrealistic & the staff were lazy, only leaving the tiny office if they absolutely had to. My friend got really annoyed at being pushed off to bed at 10pm. And the bi polar patients got well pissed off at waking up at 4am but no TV or hot drink allowed. They didn't push the socialising at all tho. Maybe it's just that Units approach. Where my friend was, they were religious about 3weeks stay then if you'd improved even a tiny bit off you went, discharged. So no- one made solid friendships in such a short time . I'd tell him to think of it as short term & not get wound up about the social side,just think about his recovery.

Films? Not when I was in recently. Two tellys, wall to wall soaps and quizzes, and that was only when the remote was around - a delusional patient kept taking it.

There were a fair few patients who were in their early twenties though.

How much "socialising" is required of him?!