Do all men have some kind of in-built avoidance/stupid gene?

[pollyglot]

Moved to our new house - he wanted a big plot to shoot on, I just wanted a smallish garden to potter. We bought a big block. He tells me that he "doesn't do gardening". Turns out that means he doesn't "do" - weeding, planting, pruning, chain-sawing, spraying, painting, lawn-mowing, window washing. Because the garage is in the garden, he also doesn't "do" washing the car, getting it in for servicing, pets to vets. Today I staged a revolt after doing 3 hours of laundry, hoovering, dishwashing, bed-changing etc, and he actually started to wash the car. (I cleaned it out/hovered yesterday inside...it really needed it). I glanced out the window just now and saw him scrubbing the car paintwork with a nylon bristle brush. The paintwork has large circular scratches and I'm guessing they are irreparable. I'm still boiling mad because that car cost me a big chunk of my pension lump-sum. Is it a clever male conspiracy to be so stupid that women have to take over, men thereby avoiding the work?

OP it's clear that some things he does don't meet your standards.
I'm sure that everything you do meets his. He's clearly a waste of space in mumsnetland.

LTB.

@powershowerforanhour

He doesn't sound like somebody who should have a firearms licence.

best thing I've read haha

Give him the car keys to get a quote for the damage to the paintwork, which of course he will pay for and sort.
If dh damaged my car like that, he might end up homeless.
He sounds incompetent.

What a stupid title. But hey if it makes you feel better to think all men are exactly the same, just because you put up with what you do..

@blueshoes

Circular scratches in paintwork is not stupid. It is a deliberate act of sabotage designed to ensure you never dare to revolt or make him do any work around the house.

That is not stupid. That is an act of war.

What are you going to do about that?

Call me naïve but I have to ask, do grown adults actually think like this? Like actually consciously think, 'what a bitch telling me to wash the car, I'll use this brush and deliberately scratch it, that'll show her'?

I see it on other threads but often the partner is abusive so it's more plausible, but I struggle to get my head around a "normal" partner sabotaging their car in some petty act of "revenge" without thinking, "this is going to be a ball ache to sort out and will probably cause a row".

He’s either astonishingly stupid or a wanker. I couldn’t be married to either tbh.

Sell a chunk of the land and use some of the be proceeds to fix your car... Both problems solved.

On a side note, if you want to keep your car swirl free don't take it through brush car washes or let the Romanians at the local hand wash anywhere near it. Another issue is hand washes using acid wash on the rims. This will gradually eat the lacquer on many expensive rims and is pure suicide with black painted rims.

I wince when I see a nice BMW/Merc etc at the hand wash when I drive past.

How do you have sex with someone as useless and lazy? Surely it's just completely unattractive.