My supervisor is wrecking stuff at work

[Kyloes]

Name change as it’s work related and I don’t want to be found out.

Basically I am going through a probation period at work and the woman mentoring me gets the final say whether I pass or not. I work with her all the time. A few things have occurred. Someone drew a penis on the bathroom wall. Obviously nobody owned up to it but one of the blokes was suspected even though he swore it wasn’t him.
Someone stabbed a fork into the staff room wall and left it hanging there. Nobody owned upto it.

Recently a woman brought homemade buns in to share (I know, Covid alert) and they were laid out all pretty on the staff room table. I walked in there to get my drink and my supervisor was there with cake all over head hand and uniform. She quickly went to the sink to wash it off and said she’d just finished her lunch and walked out quickly. I then noticed that all the buns had been smashed to pieces. It caused a massive uproar and investigation. Nobody owned upto it.

Latest one, someone brought a slimming world book in with recipes etc and left it on the table for anyone who wanted to look at it. I walked in to find my supervisor defacing the book, drawing glasses and facial hair on the women, vampire teeth, devil horns etc. When she saw me she said “I fucking hate slimming world, look what I’ve done” and showed me she’d written horrible things all through the book, ripped pages, squashed butter through it etc etc. I said “why did you do that? X is going to be furious” so she replied “yep, good”.

Anyway afterwards she told me everyone in the team thinks I’m behind the stuff that’s been going on as I’m new and nothing like this has happened before. So I said “well why can’t you tell them it was you and apologise?” So she said she only defaced the book, i had done everything else!! Now I’m paranoid as of course they’ll blame me. She’s in her mid 40s, why would someone of that act like that? Only thing on my side is she’s been posting weird stuff on Facebook lately that everyone is talking about.
AIBU to just keep quiet?? If they think it’s me I don’t want to be the one bringing it up as it will look like I’ve been waiting for a reaction

As a manager, I would expect someone in my team to report it to me if a colleague was behaving in this way.

It sounds both worrying for her sake and if she has the final say in your probation - however they shouldn’t just fail your probation for no reason.

Personally, I would report it to HR or a manager you view as trustworthy. Play it as you’re concerned about her wellbeing but I would probably mention that she has started suggesting she thinks you’re doing these things and that is concerning you.

She sounds unwell. I would go over her head and put your side.

She sounds unhinged

This sounds like she is either

(1) a nasty, manipulative weirdo who is trying to cause trouble.

(2) having some kind of medical issue - my friend's dad started doing extremely strange and nasty things when he had a brain tumour. His wife almost left him over it. Then the diagnosis came, and it was too late for him to be saved.

Either way, you do have a legit reason to report this issue as a concern, she may be ill or she may be unhinged. As others have said, no good will come of staying quiet.

Speak to HR. In addition if she has written in the book it will be her writing won’t it?

I wouldn’t report, whistleblowers always end up worse off.

Another vote for HR, and her own supervisor. She genuinely sounds ill, people should be concerned about her.

This is madness OP sounds like you work with a bunch of kids!!! Get out now, run while you still can!!!

@Fluffycloudland77

I wouldn’t report, whistleblowers always end up worse off.

The OP is not going to be any worse of, if she reports it, as the manager sounds like she either needs help or is a nasty twisted bully. If she says nothing and the manager manages to blame her, then that’s going to be worse, if she has said nothing.

I would have to say something to somebody, because a) I have too much self respect to permit bizarre behaviours being ascribed to me, and b) if she does have something sinister going on, there's a better chance of investigation into her health which might help her.

I couldn't say nothing and potentially let others think I was a weirdo who smashes cakes and stabs walls with forks. As a probationer, your job can be ended at any time without much reason. I'd rather lose my job because I reported someone else's erratic behaviour than lost it because I took the rap for something I wasn't responsible for.

I'd speak up. Ho to your HR Dept and tell them what you've said here.

Bizarre.

@Fluffycloudland77 not true and a terrible attitude. She's not a whistleblower, she's an employee offering information on another employee who's being fucking weird

Can you avoid using the staffroom? It seems that a lot of these events take place there. Take a packed lunch and sit outside or go out for a walk to town depending on the location but don't enter the staffroom at all. Then if something happens, you can't be blamed for it.

She sounds very unwell. You should contact HR and tell them what you saw, what she said, and that she's now falsely accusing you.

This creeped me out.

It sounds like she is having some kind of breakdown and you should speak to HR.
MH issues are worrying. Not "weird" "creepy" or "hilarious".

I think you need to go to HR. Tell them all she has told you and what you have witnessed.

She is incredibly immature for a woman in her 40s. Defacing the book is completely out of order.

She sounds mentally unhinged

I think the fact that she went above and beyond “writing in the book” and actually tore out pages/smeared butter within it is a very very good indication that it’s likely she is responsible for the other incidents.

I wouldn’t have even needed to come on and ask mumsnet I’d have been discussing with her direct manager/HR straight away.

This is madness.

Mentally you need to kiss the job goodbye, then you can do the right thing by you, the other "suspect" and ultimately, her.

Something is obviously not right and one of two things will happen if you whistleblow. Either you are taken seriously and she gets the help she clearly needs, or you are not and lose your job because she probably wont sign you off or HR decide you are a PITA. Sadly, in probation (and during the first 2 years really), there isnt much you can do about the second so.....

Have to say though, not sure what her being in her 40's has to do with anything.

She seems to have lost the plot. Who knows what has caused this but she desperately needs help.

Is it your place, normally no. You have caught her red handed unfortunately so you need to. She is setting you up to be the fall guy. She started this when you started working there.

HR, higher manager. Whomever will help.

I'd go to HR & make sure to also mention everyone talking about the weird stuff she's posting online . As a pp wisely said, frame it in terms of being concerned for her. She sounds like she's gone over the edge since you arrived. Does she see you as a threat or is something else going on ? Or both maybe? What do your co-workers think of her generally ? How do they describe her behaviour before the weird posts & the recent strange events?

HR now - this is bonkers. You poor thing. Write it all down. Factually dates as it all happened.

I’d go to HR.

I imagine some things happened before you started though so don’t worry about that. I’d also try to take my breaks with someone/just be around other staff most of the time until things blow over. And you could bring some cake in yourself!

Sorry just to add I’ve also had similar odd behaviour (odd statements, inappropriate conversation, then some traffic accidents) from a colleague and as pp suggested it did end up with a serious illness to blame. This took about 8 months to really unfold though.