Would you think it was weird if they didn’t say hello?

[PolarBearStrength]

If you were visiting a friend and their partner/husband was in the house, would you think it was weird if they didn’t pop their head into the kitchen to say hi? (Person is not working so not stuck on conference calls or anything like that and it’s not a massive house so they know you are there.)

YABU - It’s perfectly normal not to say hello
YANBU - It’s rude not to greet guests

I think it's quite weird and impolite but my BIL is exactly like this. I'll visit my sister and he'll not bother coming and talking at all unless he has to.

Weird? Not at all. Unless you are part of a group of friends. I wouldn't dream of going in if DH had a friend round. I'm autistic though so social interaction is the last thing I want to be doing with strangers.

YANBU. It's just basic courtesy to say hello and then if needed to make yourself scarce.

I have some friends that I don’t know their husbands and I wouldn’t think this was weird. My best friend yes, as we are all friends in a big group.

If I'm working upstairs I wouldn't pop down unless I was going down for a coffee or something. I find it hard to refocus if i take a break.

Re-read OP. If I wasn't working id say hi.

I would be of the mindset that I could leave my partner alone for a while and not intrude on their social time, with their friend. So no, I wouldn't find it strange at all.

...Indeed, if I integrated myself into the situation (for no real reason other than to pop in and say hello), I would consider it quite rude and a little bit pushy.

I think it depends on what they're doing tbh. If they're in the next room not doing much - yeah, a bit odd/rude, but if they're upstairs & engrossed in something, then no.

I’d expect them to pop their head in and say hi, yes! You’re in their home, it’s rude to ignore you.

I think a quick hello is polite and normal, it’s weird if you can hear them moving around in next room etc and don’t. Exception being if they’re working or similar.

Depends on the context I guess. If I went to have a quick coffee with a friend and their OH was in another room looking after kids/watching sport/doing something and I didn't know them then I wouldn't find it rude no.

It's a bit graceless

Unless they were walking through and didn’t say hello then I wouldn’t think it was odd. You’re not their guest.

Yes I would find this bizarre, but I tend to gravitate towards friends who we can socialise with as an individual and as a couple. One of my good friends has a husband who goes out of his way not to socialise with us and I find that excruciatingly awkward (for example if there is a child’s party he’ll completely ignore a whole group of us and only speak to people he’s decided he likes ).

I’d always offer a drink or a cuppa for DH’s friends, say hi and if it wasn’t a couples thing I would bugger off after that). DH does the same and sometimes checks we have enough wine...my friends drink more than his!

If they were, say in the bedroom and you were meeting your friend in the lounge, I wouldn't find it odd that they hadn't said hello. If you actually see them and they ignore you or, for example, they make themselves a drink but don't offer you one, I'd find that weird.

And in current climate, perhaps they are trying to minimise interactions with others?

I know a few people who don't bother coming to say hello and I always think it's rather ignorant.

However when exDH and I were together he would often do this when his MH was particularly bad.

I can see it from both sides tbh and it entirely depends on people’s personalities.

Some people may find it rude not to acknowledge guests; some may find it more rude that the other person can’t just let their spouse get on with it and have an evening with their friend. Neither is wrong really, just different outlooks.

I would say hi if I was in the same room but wouldn't go say hello otherwise.

As a guest, I would find it weird - as if the partner didn't welcome you to their home, and didn't really want you there,

I would assume they do not like you OP. Or they have fallen out and he/she did not want to look at their partner.

I think it’s very rude. Ahhh it reminds me of my ex who actually used to pretend to be asleep when my parents came in to drop my son and myself home. He would just lay there on the sofa and not move. But then I may be unreasonable as the thought of anything he does makes me mad😂

My husband is shy and would be happier hiding away. But if he actually sees the guests he will say hello/make chit chat/ drive them to station ect, but he has been guilty of just hiding away. He’s not meaning to be rude.

i'm glad the jury is out on this because my DH is like this and I am always uncomfortable about it but he says it's normal! Actually he is a little shy but sometimes he just can't be bothered.

As a massive introvert, I would neither want any random partners I didn't know "popping in" to say hello, nor would I dream of doing it if my DH had a friend over that I didn't know and I was busy doing something elsewhere in the house. Just why?
Of course, if you're walking through their room to e.g. get a coffee, it would be very rude not to say hello, introduce yourself, offer a coffee etc. That is natural interaction, not forced.

I'm somewhere in the middle. It can be weird but it can be ok.

My husband often doest say hello but he is weird. 🥺