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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to not go out of my way for this relative?

8 replies

Jj2431 · 08/09/2020 01:39

So I just had a baby a couple of weeks ago. So far my parents, sister and mil have seen baby and now we want to wait a bit longer for anyone else to see baby because 1. I haven't had a rest since baby has been born. I've been quite unwell since the birth too and 2. Covid.

Anyway earlier this year when we announced the pregnancy my husbands aunt took the hump because we didn't tell her directly and she heard it on social media from our announcement. We are not close to her so didn't feel the need to call her personally (as we didn't with my extended family either). She didn't bother to congratulate us at all throughout the entire pregnancy and openly went out of her way to stop talking to me because of it. Fast forward to the birth and she finally congratulates us but then writes a status on social media about how certain people must not trust her around children. Her friends commented and it was clear she had been bitching about us to her friends because after 10 days we hadn't let her see the baby.

Aibu to think first of all why should we anyway considering you didn't bother before she was born? And 2. Why would a family member you're not close to expect to see the baby so soon when some grandparents don't even get to see their grandkids that quick?! And 3. You've been slating us so I definitely don't want to go out of my way to let you see my baby now.

I am too old for drama so haven't said anything and I also finally get along with mil so don't want to cause an argument.

OP posts:
hastingsmua1 · 08/09/2020 01:44

She sounds like hard work

hastingsmua1 · 08/09/2020 01:45

A distant relative meeting a newborn after 10 days is completely fine. It’s simply acceptable/normal.

DPotter · 08/09/2020 02:07

The only family members we told directly were both sets of parents and my sister. The family grapevine did for the rest!

I'd unfriend her on SM and leave her to it. your MIL can keep her updated

OldEvilOwl · 08/09/2020 12:49

Ignore her. She wants a reaction

Jj2431 · 08/09/2020 13:23

@OldEvilOwl that's exactly what we are doing because she thrives on the drama.

OP posts:
RealityExistsInTheHumanMind · 08/09/2020 15:00

She wants a reaction, don't give her one

CloverHilla · 08/09/2020 15:05

Don't feed the drama! You've done nothing wrong, even in non-Covid days I wouldn't think anything of her not seeing baby yet. Rest, relax and enjoy your new baby! Congratulations Flowers

JemimaTiggywinkle · 08/09/2020 15:06

Unfollow (not unfriend) her on Facebook so you can’t see her updates.... I did this to my MIL a few months ago, best decision I ever made

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