To wonder what the buggery bollocks Jamie Oliver means half the time

[scaryfrogfish]

I'm currently flicking through his 5 ingredients cookbook, and several times it says to cook something until it's "gnarly". He even has whole recipes called "gnarly" this that and the other.

Gnarly means dangerous... I cannot find a single definition that could be descriptive of exactly how this "gnarly" food is supposed to look.

He uses the wrong word all the time for things, like a "good gulag of oil" and it just irritates me.

AIBU to think "gnarly" is a shit description when you're trying to explain to a cook how something needs to look?

@Boireannachlaidir

I see what you mean OP, sadly I think he's just trying to be down with the kids/ appeal to the masses /wider audience and it will grate on some of us.

Plenty of people disliked Nigella's easy conversational style in her cookery books and there are those who will prefer Delia's precise instructions. I think it depends on what type of a cook you are perhaps. Confident or slapdash ones prefer the former for example. Horses for courses

I've warmed to Jamie over the years but I expect I'd find his "cheeky mockery" banter irritating in his books.

This is interesting. I do consider myself a fairly confident cook, but that confidence is hard-earned after following recipes to the letter, and working out what went wrong when something's not quite right.

I don't think, even as a confident cook, it's helpful to hear that you need a "dash" of an important ingredient, or a "good handful". I think measurements are always important... and a more confident cook can then tailor that, according to their experience.

His recipes, to give him due, are generally pretty good (if heavy on the herbs). It's just a pain the arse trying to work out what he actually means sometimes.

And exactly how far to go back in time when you're plating up your retro noodles.

Gnarly is surfer speak.

As in "that wave was gnarly" or "gnarly, dude".

It means good, amazing.

So, "cook till it looks good". "Excellent peanut chicken". Etc

Nah, gnarley does it for me.
The words may be wrong, but the sentiment shines through.
I know EXACTLY what he means with words like this.

Don't get the dislike for JO, i think he is fine. Like his cook books, 'Save with Jamie' is a cracker.

There are other chefs I prefer, don't get me wrong, but there is nothing wrong with Jamie.

@LioneIRichTea

Turn the noodles out onto a plate, retro style

YABU OP, I always plate up my noodles whilst wearing flares and singing Bee Gees Staying Alive

According to my teen daughter, retro is now the 90s (yes, that's right, I'm still in shock, the 90s were just yesterday!) so you will have to plate it up while wearing grunge or channelling Britney Spears.

Unless you're really attached to the flares and BeeGees, in which case you'll be going retro.

Aaargh! You'll be going VINTAGE if you channel the 70s.

I hate that there isn't an edit button

According to my teen daughter, retro is now the 90s (yes, that's right, I'm still in shock, the 90s were just yesterday!) so you will have to plate it up while wearing grunge or channelling Britney Spears.

I’m in denial, my teen years are not retro!!

Plating up whilst listening to Nirvana though is a common occurrence in my house Actually, I’m glad this means I’m retro and not desperately hanging on to my youth

I was at university in the 90s and the way to serve noodles was in a plastic pot.

@LioneIRichTea

I have it now. This is why I love Mumsnet. Everything has become clear and I take it all back.

I need to cook food until it looks AWESOME (the awesomeness should presumably be obvious even to the untrained eye).

I need to plate up my noodles retro-style whilst singing HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME at top volume. But wearing flares/crinolines is taking it too far.

Cool. IABU. Sorted.

He's a pillock!

He seems to be a person who always has a catch phrase. I guess he's tried to move away from the ones he used 20 years ago like "pukka " and "mate" I remember Christian O'Connell taking the piss out the latter- JO would say stuff like "my mates the mustard seeds mate"

I assume gnarly is rustic - caramelized, uneven, darker in colour etc than a precise chef like Gary Rhodes

Retro noodles- is it the plate that makes it retro?

@linerforlife

Gnarled means "knobbly, rough, twisted". With regards to gulag instead of glug of oil... He is dyslexic, and it's a common trait to use the wrong words for things.

Surely his editor could sort that out?

@mynameiscalypso You are spot on about the "season to perfection" - I have literally just seen that in 12 recipes IN A ROW.

How a proofreader or editor didn't pick that up, I've no idea...

Unless... do you think his new cookbook has been written by a bot?

(Possibly a bish bash bot. I'll get my coat.)

The recipe you are referring to is that gnarly peanut chicken which is DELICIOUS!! So yeah defo try that (sorry you can now proceed with your discussion)

Also it would make sense for the chicken to be gnarly cus the sauce has peanut butter in it which you then grill so it goes all rough and bumpy on the top

@Blondefancy

Also it would make sense for the chicken to be gnarly cus the sauce has peanut butter in it which you then grill so it goes all rough and bumpy on the top

But that's "gnarled", damn it. Not gnarly!

(Rough and bumpy is a fine description though, thank you.)

www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/chicken-recipes/gnarly-peanut-chicken/

I think it looks burnt. Is that what gnarly means?

Oh the blokes a twat. Always has been right up his own arse.

Anyone who demonstrates how to tell if an avocado is ripe by crushing it in his fist and shouting bang or whatever it was is not to be taken seriously.

and the dark brown hair dye?

Hahaha at burnt! True.

Why do you give this man with his fake mockney accent the time of day?

Retro style probably means set in gelatine. Disgusting.

You might like this Asian comedian reviewing Jamie's egg fried rice recipe m.youtube.com/watch?v=t_KdbASIkB8

Aww man no hating on the Jamie.

@scaryfrogfish ace thread, particularly liking corset and crinoline, and totes hilaire. Dead funny, you are.

Don't engage or follow if you don't like him. Simple

I can only ever watch him with the volume off.