Sex when you can't stand your body

[greenshoel]

I used to love my body. I really loved it. I had a child, and I'm struggling with the changes. I've got stretch marks from my pelvis up to my boobs (riddled with them). One boob is a C cup, the other an E! Thanks breastfeeding. My legs are riddled with stretch marks. My belly button piercing has turned in to a wrinkled prune. I've not got lots of excess body hair (had tests done for this, all normal, was told sometimes this just happens after pregnancy). Basically, my body is grim and I hate it. I've started seeing someone and everything is perfect apart from this one thing. With clothes on you'd never know the potato sack that's underneath. How the hell can I ever stand to be naked in front of him?

*now

How old is your baby now?

@AnneLovesGilbert

How old is your baby now?

He's 22 months. I'm really fit and lost all my baby weight. I run half marathons and don't have any issues with my weight. I just hate the things I sadly can't change.

I need to restore my body confidence somehow...

Anyone? I'm close to tears here. Body image meltdown

I'm so sorry you're feeling that way. On a practical level with the body hair, waxing, epilating, shaving and longer term something like the lumea will deal with it. I'm pretty hairy but the lumea has helped a lot.

In terms of the other things, I don't think there is a magic instant fix for feeling better about them. I know it sounds trite and it won't do much to ease your worries but I doubt the guy you're seeing will care. If he objectively studies your boobs, yes, he might realise they're not the same sizes but boobs rarely are. I guess think of it this way, have you ever been with a guy who maybe doesn't have a perfect body? You probably have, I have for sure. But if you're into him those imperfections are just by the by. It's not that you don't know they exist but they're just not on your radar. It will be the same in reverse. Plus, we tend to see the bad things in ourselves so while I'm not trying to tell you you have no flaws, because that would be patronising, they are almost certainly less noticeable to someone else. Not least because they will also be looking at all the great things.

Hi op. Ive had 2. They ruined my body.
But.... i am not letting them ruin my sexlife 😁. This is now the body you have. So morn for the loss of the old one. Hate your new one. Accept the new one. And become confident with the new one.

In that order hahaha..

It takes time yes. But you cant change certain things. So one must accept what is. Xx

At 22 months postpartum this is NOT your body for ever more. Honestly. It takes a while to settle down. My belly looks slightly wrinkled in certain positions and my belly button isn't the same as before, but it's not bad at all and I like my body again. I don't think others will notice in the way that you do. My youngest is 3 years and a few months old.

Haven't had stretch marks to speak of but my best friend had loads and now they aren't visible, haven't been for a while, and her child is 4.