Loneliness

[TheStoic]

I was listening to a podcast today that referred to a clinical study about loneliness. It mentioned that they compared the brain scans of self-identified ‘lonely’ people to those of ‘hungry’ people, and showed that the same neural pathways are being activated in both cases, indicating that human connection is as much a biological need as is food.

Does that surprise you, or does that seem really obvious?

I’ve been lonely, and it’s one of the worst feelings in the world. Are you lonely? Have you felt chronic loneliness? I strongly believe that ‘quality’ is far more important than ‘quantity’ when it comes to human relationships, which makes things even more difficult.

If you were the Minister for Loneliness, what measures would you introduce to help people?

Not in the least surprised. In psychology, connections and belonging are known to be fundamental needs. If I were minister for loneliness I would give grants to towns and villages (regardless of size) to fund / set up more community centres and professionals to run volunteer projects within communities that anyone can get involved with.

This explains why I don't get lonely. I'm not fussed about food either!

Not surprising at all. I've had periods of loneliness in my life and it's been just awful and quite shocking how quick my mental health declined. I think this would surprise most people who know me as I don't seem the "type" to be lonely - you can never really tell who's struggling.

Now I have two preschoolers - I don't have the time to feel lonely

Makes sense to me. Definitely should be more social events. One issue, our large village has few amenities. No traditional shops (butcher/baker/grocer). Places where you’d see the same old people. We have a village hall and a function room and I think there are missed opportunities there. Things are very centralised now eg big hospital covering two boroughs whereas there were previously lots of small ones

Inter-generational befriending
Volunteering opportunities
Therapeutic gardening
Crafting/book groups
Walking groups

Pet cuddling get togethers - is what Id introduce...

I work in an area where reducing loneliness and isolation is a target; but it does depend on where you live as to what's available which is a shame.

This might seem a bit left field, but one of the things that I think would help would be not putting the clocks back in the winter. I expect feelings of loneliness are increased by darkness, and for those with sight limitations or fears about being out in the dark, longer daylight in the afternoons would be of help.

Loneliness is hell...I'm not lonely thankfully

Doesn't surprise me at all.

I'm so used to it that it surprised me when people were upset about missing people and hugs during lockdown. I've been a lone parent for a decade and probably get a hug from my dc's a few times a year. Never go out in the evening. Work at a screen in a non chatty office. I was quite excited when I finally got back into my local Sainsburys and saw the staff again.