To ask your most WTF moments

[latheritup]

We went to the zoo recently and was walking down to the tiger enclosure. We saw a man had jumped over the fence into the greenery to retrieve his glasses that 'fell off' and subsequently the tigers all came to the front of their enclosure.

I can't think why he wouldn't ask a zookeeper to safely get them or was he just trying to get the tigers closer for a better pic?! Either way my face was

I've attached a wonderful diagram. Very proud of it

Oh yes and I was once walking back from my lunch break when I got cut off by a huge group of motorbikes. I mean huge, I'd say minimum 600. after a bit I started timing it. It took them eight minutes for every bike to pass me.

A funnier moment was years ago, at work, I was in early at at the photocopier when one of the Directors, who had cycled into work, charged out of his office in a panic.

'Earrings, where will I get trousers?'

Me: 😮

Director looks around and spots a colleague, same level as myself: 'Jim, take off your trousers, I've forgotten mine & I'm meeting X client [very big client] in 10 minutes'

Jim laughs nervously before realising Director is serious.

Ends up that Jim wears Director's recently worn Lyra cycling shorts for most of the morning, while Director takes Jim's trousers. Jim was about 3 sizes bigger than Director so Director looked like he was wearing a sack, and well, Jim... I'll leave it to your imagination.

He got huge slagging. He didn't leave his desk for the morning. Director placed a call to another client & had a spiffing new suit delivered late morning, and Jim was reunited with his trousers.

I still remember standing there going, 'this can't be happening'.

A woman standing perfectly still looking at the flower garden at the National Trust in Devon as the wind repeatedly lifted her thin cotton dress gently into the air revealing her to be completely nude beneath. She stood stock still for several minutes enjoying that breeze!

I must have more moments I can’t quite remember now, but this reminded me of one.

In my old job, I was staffing a stall with a colleague at a large local festival type event. A woman in her 70s came over and kept leaning over the table at the front of our stall. Every time she did, her dress slipped off her shoulder and her rather large naked breast popped out. She would just stand up and pop it back in, then do the same thing all over again.

We didn’t know where to look.

@EarringsandLipstick

I was in a busy shopping centre last year, and apologised to a mum for nearly bumping into her and her pram, in which there was a newborn baby.

As I moved & glanced down, I had to stifle a scream, as the 'baby' was grey & lifeless. I realised quickly it was one of those 'reborn' dolls and that the poor lady wasn't quite right.

I'd seen them in TV programmes but never in a setting like this & this obviously was a bit worse for wear.

The lady had the pram kitted out with everything you'd need for a baby, nappy bag, bottles, blankets. It was 💔

She was tenderly checking on the baby every so often - but then would get distracted & walk away and just leave the 'baby' resulting in lots of concerned shoppers looking around, checking 'baby' and reacting like me.

It stayed with me for a while, what her situation was & just the sadness of it I suppose.

There was a TV programme about those dolls (and their buyers) some years ago. (I've mentioned it before on MN). One lady had one made to look identical to her grandson when he was a baby (she'd been his F/T carer from birth till he was about three, then his single mum got married and moved to Australia with him). It was heartbreaking - she was obviously quite literally deranged with grief, I do hope she found peace nd came to terms with him being taken to another hemisphere.

Another woman was just cracked - she had dozens of the damn things! She went to America to get a new one (it was special), and spent three days of something "'bonding" with it in a hotel room - then she noticed it's head was cracked (I was thinking "not the only one"). As it had cost her umpteen thousand pounds she was understandably furious and wanted her money back, but also extra for the mental anguish she had suffered having to part with a doll she'd "bonded" with.

The most disturbing part of the programme was a lady who painted the dolls' faces, She put them into an oven to set the glaze (or whatever). The sight of what appeared to be a baby being put into an oven was a bit even when I knew it wasn't real . . .

Being at a conference and seeing a hugely respected, internationally famous grande dame in my field presenting. Wearing a very short skirt. Above table: famous face giving amazing pres. Below: gusset.

Lived in a rural town in France with an espace d'animation. Circus show came to town. Went out for a walk around 11pm, a moonlit summer night, very quiet. Clocked one of the performers walking home. A man wearing a long cloak, on stilts, passing swiftly and silently along a moon-dappled, empty country road. Super eerie!

Most of these make the two gypsies having an axe-fight outside our office window 40-odd years ago, look almost sane.

@SchadenfreudePersonified I think I've seen that too! The one 'baking' them definitely rings bells... yes, I remember not being able to watch it either.

We had just moved to Boston and I was walking through Boston Common (full of squirrels) at lunchtime. There was a man in a suit walking ahead of me- very corporate lawyer type. He suddenly left the path and started furiously shaking the branch of a tree until a squirrel fell out and landed splat on the ground. He then resumed his walk.

Also, great thread!

landed splat on the ground.

Splat...dead? 😳

[quote EarringsandLipstick]@SchadenfreudePersonified I think I've seen that too! The one 'baking' them definitely rings bells... yes, I remember not being able to watch it either. [/quote]
It was . . . creeeeepy . .

No it recovered and ran off But it landed like a cartoon squirrel - its little legs and arms out to the side. I wonder what that man is doing now. Possibly has a job in the Trump administration.

Possibly has a job in the Trump administration.

@pallisers

😂😂😂 very likely!

@JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff

Being at a conference and seeing a hugely respected, internationally famous grande dame in my field presenting. Wearing a very short skirt. Above table: famous face giving amazing pres. Below: gusset.

Lived in a rural town in France with an espace d'animation. Circus show came to town. Went out for a walk around 11pm, a moonlit summer night, very quiet. Clocked one of the performers walking home. A man wearing a long cloak, on stilts, passing swiftly and silently along a moon-dappled, empty country road. Super eerie!

I would have thought it was the BFG 🤣

When we had very heavy snow a few years ago I slipped and slid my way on foot to our local village as conditions were too treacherous to drive.

I passed a car driving fast up the hill, towing a guy on skis.

@ravenmum if someone told me not to look out the window it would be the first thing I did!

The bat story has reminded me of another one.

We were on the train once and a girl got on with a rat on her shoulder. It was clearly a posturing thing, she wasn't a goth exactly, but you wouldn't do that unless you wanted people to react I wouldn't think.

Nowadays I'd say "ooh that's a clever trick, what's his name? Isn't he lovely?" etc but back then I said nothing.

After a while the girl got up and moved further down the train to a different carriage. Maybe that's why I felt she was looking for a reaction because there was absolutely no reason to move, nothing was happening to render our carriage unacceptable.

About 10 minutes after this she crashed back into our carriage at speed, I could see she was in tears, really upset, and she had blood and marks on her neck.

I still wonder what happened. Did the rat suddenly stop behaving well and attack her? Or did she encounter someone with a rat phobia who struck out at the rat and panicked it? I felt ever so sorry for her as it was a nice trick to have a tame rat on your shoulder.

Mine is probably passing this chap when walking home one afternoon.

There's a woman I sometimes encounter when out dog-walking, and we always say hi.
About a year ago, met her and noticed her formerly white little dog now had bright pink paws and tail...
I said, "Oh, her paws..."
Her response, utterly straight faced, was, "Oh yes, she went to a wedding last week."
😂 Like that made it normal.

Another time, my partner and I were in a restaurant. There were 6 people at the table in front of ours, 3 couples. They were all blotto, and we watched as they managed to have not 1, not 2, but 3 huge stand up, swearing, properly aggressive rows with each other. We and all the other guests were agog!

Op your people are from Guess Who? :o

I can do better than a diagram. I have photos of mine. Walking to work through the City of London, very sleep deprived as I was working full time with a non-sleeping baby, a dead dinosaur drove past me on the back of a lorry.

This thread gives me faith that mumsnet is not just a depressing waste of my time

Not quite WTF but had us in stitches.
Driving on the motorway behind a full estate car with a very large dog in the back. the dog crouched down and very obviously did a large poop. About 10 seconds later the car windows went down and all the pasengers put their heads out. Worst of all it was still miles to the next exit.

This is a gross story. In Brixton many years ago on my lunch break. An older woman was walking along infront of me carrying shopping in both hands. She stopped, turned so her back was to the wall, put down her shopping, bent over, pulled up her skirt and let out a violent stream of diarrhoea on the wall. She finished, dropped the skirt back down, picked up her shopping and walked on.

Have had so many WTF moments in my career as a midwife.
One woman had very heavily soiled sanitary pad on her table next to food she was going to eat despite the bin being right next to her bed

Worst case ever was man giving his wife oral sex on ward trying to bring labour on at the time but now nothing shocks me