To think 25 isn’t that old to live at home

[thedaywewillremeber]

Ds1’s 25 year old friend has to move back home after their relationship ended. She’s extremely upset about this. While I think at 25 you should have a plan of action with regards to moving out. I don’t think it’s that old to still be at home particularly in the south.

Home is and has always been a bolthole for my lot when things have gone wrong.
Currently housing my daughter and grandson until they move out, and she is older than 25.

Having said that I am getting to the stage where I want to be alone and when they go I will downsize in an effort to stop people from migrating back ( or wanting to)

No way , not with the price of rentals and the crap pay most people have to endure.

That’s what ds1 has said to her. No one that’s a true friend would judge her for it anyway.

Many won’t have even left home at 25 save for uni. It’s not that old at all.

No I think about 20 years ago it wouldn’t have been that common but is more so now.

I would have rather died than live at home at 25 but I wouldn’t judge anyone who did.

I was still living at home in my early 30s, although I’d moved around quite a bit before that. I did feel for my parents but they were great when I needed them.

Ds is job hunting, will be 25 next month. We can afford to have him at home and support him, so we do.

It is and it isn't. Depends on circumstances.
It's absolutely ok and shouldn't be questioned if someone moves back because of breakdown in relationship/loss of job etc.
When it's odd is when they never moved out, pay tenner a week and don't know how to work a dishwasher👀

Yes it’s old to have never lived anywhere else, having to move back in temporarily due to relationship break down, job losses etc is completely different.

Relationship break down meant I moved back home with a 4 year old aged 28. I stayed almost 2 years. Parents had large house, so had own bedroom, little lounge and bathroom. Parents fully supported me in staying ( I paid share of bills and bought own food) as it meant I could gather savings for deposit and I also worked at a pub some evenings for extra money. Meaning I left fully self sufficient and not needing any more support.

My kids will be the boomerang generation. Rent is so expensive, young people are all living month to month, it doesn't take much to force them back home from time to time. I shall be keeping our large family home for as long as possible, to make sure there is room for them and any partners and/or children. I always want to be able to offer them a safe, warm place to stay and there will be no judgement from me!

Yes it is rather old. Then again I moved out at 19 and have never lived with my parents since and that was in a high rental market too. I just worked extremely hard.

It's not old but must be difficult given the circumstances.

Not particularly old - I'm assuming my teens will be moving out somewhere between the ages of 20 and 25. I moved back home for about 6 months with DH when I was pregnant with my first child as we had to leave our rental property and couldn't find anything else as cheap so needed to save up. It wasn't ideal and I didn't enjoy living with my parents as an adult but I don't think it is unusual. My friend and her 2 kids moved in with her mum when she was about 31 (after divorce) and is still there 10 years later as it works well for them all.

25 is nothing these days. Even more 35 year olds than you'd think. In fact I even know someone over 40 who moved back a year or two ago.

I always feel so nervous when people say "Now that my DD is off to uni, we want to move to a smaller house hundreds of miles away". What if she needs to move back?

I don't think it's too old. I don't think it's anyone's business, especially if it works for the people living there.

I didn't move out until I was 24; even when I went to university I stayed at home. Since I moved out, various other siblings moved back in for months or years at a time for a range of reasons. One sibling lived there until buying a house in their early 30s. My mum has now moved into a bungalow but this is due to mobility issues rather than discouraging her adult children from living with her!

I left home at 18 and only briefly returned at 21 to stay with my DF. I could have gone home to him whenever I wanted to. My DS will always be welcome to stay with me as long and whenever he wants. I think of our home as just that.

It's not old. Living in London meant most of my friends didn't move out until the job paid enough. It has to be a decent job to earn enough. My brother didn't move out until near 30. I moved out when I married at 28 (but lived with an aunt, paid a small amount in rent, but enjoyed helping her with bills/sharing shopping). This set up is the only way one can save for a house deposit. Especially if, like me, you come from a family with very little wealth. It's not easy to move out without substantial savings or a loan/gift from parents.

My husband is from a similar background, so rather than move out to rent, we delayed things until we had a deposit to buy. Now he also owns a home abroad, and they hopefully will have good savings accounts upon turning 18 .

I will always want a space at home for my children to return if plans don't work out. Both my parents needed to return home at one point (long after splitting), but my mum was turned away and struggled with finances until very recently.

It depends. Someone who’s never left home and is being infantilised by having mummy running around after them doing their cooking, cleaning and washing, spending all their money on nights out and not contributing a fair amount for food and bills is very different to someone mucking in with the chores, paying their way and hopefully saving to move out.

I think it would be old if you've never moved out but to return after uni or between properties or in this case due to a relationship break up I think isn't particularly old and probably all she can manage financially in the short term. It might just be a stop gap until she can get her own place. The price of rent compared to most salaries is phenomenal, I don't know young people now ever afford to move out of home. My own flat would rent for over 50% more than I currently pay on my mortgage.

I'm 25 and would say it's not old if they have a plan of how they are going to move out as soon as they can and are contributing to the household.
I would feel quite bad if my family had stayed in a bigger house that cost them more money just in case I needed a room at some time. I'm quite happy to sleep on the sofa or stay elsewhere when visiting as I know they're better off financially where they live now.

I nearly had to move back in with my parents at 25 and although we have a really good relationship I was mortified by the idea. Fortunately I managed to find a suitable rented place. I think maybe if I hadn't left home I might have felt differently, however as I'd moved out and lived independently since 18 the idea of going back felt like a huge regression at the time. Obviously I felt and still feel very lucky to know that I have the option.

It is old but understandable. It would be worse if 30+.

Not in the south, no.

I think moving back in temporarily is fine providing the DP are ok with it.