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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

aibu to think mn should be for mums and not dads.

882 replies

2hot2cook · 06/10/2007 12:39

id like to think that when i come on here for a quick chat im talking to other women. ive noticed some men on here and thats actually putting me off. some of the topics we talk about are very intimate. i cant understand why men would want to come on this website, maybe the name should be changed to parentnet. aibu.

OP posts:
LyraSilvertongue · 06/10/2007 22:32

Time to leave for pastures new then 2hot?

dh1 · 06/10/2007 22:33

Hello girls!

Mumsnet for girlies, pah, where's the fun in that?

2hot2cook, without wanting to disabuse you anyway...get a life, grow up.

Parenting is not an exclusively female preserve. Why should it be? I haven't read ALL of your posts, tbh I couldn't arsed. (Ooops is that too much of a Male thing?) My DW works her georgous little (well perhaps not so little) backside off so that I can enjoy the fun of being a dad who takes the time to ensure that his little boy has that rare opportunity of spending some time with his dad, while he is still a wee boy.

If you feel that a "man's not a man" because he's interested in his kids, well, pity and shame on you. The worst kind of girlie if you ask me.

I have on many occasions asked Mumsnet HQ why the site is called Mumsnet and not Parentsnet and the answer I've had is usually along the lines of "oh, go on, that's how we started, live with it..." And guess what, me and plenty of other saddo dads who aren't real men but want to take an interest in our kids DO.

If you don't want a forum where dads come on, seek advice, get a woman's point of view, listen to and perhaps see a different point of view and MOST IMPORTANTLY, modify their own views to take into account how their kids might feel andhow their Dw or DP might feel, well gee whizz, don't come on here. On the other hand if you want to help engender a genuine sense of parents working together and trying to understand each other, well you might be welcomed back.

I live in a part of the world where traditionally blokes aren't encouraged to REALLY take part in the lives of their kids - it's soft, it's not "manly" - well what a load of bollocks that kind of attitude is.

I'm a very active dad, not because I HAVE to, because I want to. I have a great wee boy, a smashing DW and lots of really supportive friends male and female who want to give more time to their kids and are quite envious of the way my dw and myself are able to organise our time with our wee guy. BUT, we also talk with each other, girl and boy, about how we are doing in bringing up our kids -mum and dad, dad and mum....the need for the complete answer. AND (oops my dw will really pick me up my grammatical mistakes here), most importantly, men talk to women and women talk to men - we take advice from each other -oh dear is that too healthy, too normal?

Oh well, I'll go back to watching the rugby now, all that testorone, good for a guy, even one who moisturises!

TheArmadillo · 06/10/2007 22:34

so why have you kept chatting on this site for so long?

It's Elvis isn't it - you're mad for him. I bet that photo drove you wild.

Well he wants you too baby. DOn't be shy.

Kewcumber · 06/10/2007 22:35

I HEART 2hot2cook - don't frighten her away. She's very funny.

women have a 'dirty nappy' so we like ti and men don't (where do I find mine - I lost it somewhere?)
men can talk to women in work because they can't avoid it, but on the internet would be icky
don't talk to partner about 'personal things', doesn't most of your life count as personal? What do you discuss? The weather?
Likes men to do manly things. Genwtically just about the only manly things were killing wooly mammoth and fighting off sabre tooth tigers. Only female things were breast feeding and probably gathering nuts/berries (no nappies obviously so I suspect you may be worng about the nappy gene) - everything else is each societies view of what is male/female.

Hats off to your DH he has you sussed - you do all the hard borig bits of parenting and he gets 'quality time' with the kids because he works sooo hard. Turst me, I work, it isn;t as hard as he would have you beleive, and you get to go to the toilet on your own.

Don't go 2hot2work - stick aorund you're funny.

lilolilmanchester · 06/10/2007 22:36

I can imagine that in RL there are certain topics you might not broach with men and would feel more comfortable talking to women about. But this is MN. No one can see you. No one knows who you are (unless you want them to) I would have thought that men who join a site like this are probably more likely to be sympathetic to women and women's issues than some of the women who post on here. At the end of the day, we are all people. If I were you, I'd read the posts from the men on here THEN come back and talk about why it bothers you (I had written a couple of suggestions as to why that might be but decided they were unfair and deleted them).

Kewcumber · 06/10/2007 22:36

women have a 'dirty nappy' GENE

chipmonkey · 06/10/2007 22:37

Thanks for clarifying that Kew!

TheKing · 06/10/2007 22:38

But I can find anything online - even on Venus.

And I found you Armadillo and I'm all shook up...

www.bike4vets.org/images/journal_photos/week05/large/armadillo.jpg

Hello MrPrettybird - I know you too.....

Kewcumber · 06/10/2007 22:38

There are whole other sites for that

LyraSilvertongue · 06/10/2007 22:38

2hot2work

lilolilmanchester · 06/10/2007 22:39

(while deciding whether to include or delete what I wrote initially, DH1 posted his response) Well said DH1!!! End of!

TheArmadillo · 06/10/2007 22:39

d'ya like my bling - well d'ya.

I look hot

LentilweaverDaisyboo · 06/10/2007 22:39

A very good reason why men should be allowed to post on this site

HERE

LyraSilvertongue · 06/10/2007 22:40

This thread has descended into complete silliness. How many posts till it implodes?

Habbibu · 06/10/2007 22:41

Daisy, she's ignored that twice now. Third time lucky, perchance?

LyraSilvertongue · 06/10/2007 22:41

Oh 500+ to go...

LentilweaverDaisyboo · 06/10/2007 22:41

although I realise 2hot2cook has conceded it's not a bad thing....

Bobsdad · 06/10/2007 22:41

dh1, you truly are da man. You took the words right out of my mouth. I'd have your babies, except I'm a bloke too.

Darn. Does that mean I have to resign my membership

TheArmadillo · 06/10/2007 22:43

what silliness? Whose being silly?

Bet it's that 2hot2cook. She's always causing trouble

Bringing down the tone that one. I bet in her spare time she talks to strange men and you know what they say about women who do that

2hot2cook · 06/10/2007 22:43

dh1; i think its great that you've come on here to defend the male point of view. i said at the start that maybe the name mumsnet is wrong.
but some women come on here to talk about things they may feel embarrased talking to rl friends about. you must understand that.

OP posts:
LentilweaverDaisyboo · 06/10/2007 22:44

sorry, I seem to have lost the plot entirely.....

obv my mooncup purchase has made me go all light headed.

Rachmumoftwo · 06/10/2007 22:45

Not msny men on the mooncup thread though....

Rachmumoftwo · 06/10/2007 22:45

(many) I wish I could type.

TheArmadillo · 06/10/2007 22:46

well don't talk about your vagina on here then, go find a dr to talk to about it.

Bobsdad · 06/10/2007 22:47

Not posting perhaps, but definitely reading. I'm still chuckling to myself over the fact you can call it a 'flange'.