Play dates and TV; my DC say I’m too strict.

[OhDear2200]

I arranged play dates for both my DC today, their best friends. Got their favourite food in, thought they would play all day. But within 1 hour my DS was asking it they could watch TV then a couple or hours later my DD was watching TV.

I would only let them watch for a short time.

Am I being super mean? My kids seem to think so. But my argument is that the whole point of having friends round is that you play (7 &10 so not teenagers).

I feel like I’m in a constant screen time battle and Want play dates to be screen free. AIBU and mean?

If the play date was only for a couple of hours I wouldn't expect them to watch TV. But if it was for a whole day I wouldn't have a problem with them watching TV/a film for some of the time.

I don't really see a problem with them watching TV if that's what they want to do.

It's not a hill I would die on, personally.

I think that is a bit mean actually, especially for the 10 year old.

For an all day play date I'd probably have pre-planned a film in the middle of the day but I would expect them to entertain themselves the rest of the time.

I'd be disappointed if they watched a lot of TV, but it's fine as long as they were doing other stuff too. Play dates can be quite intense / tiring for them and they may need to chill out for part of the time.

I don't know I'm interested in what people say about this cos I also think the same

When my dc were younger they had fab times watching TV and films with friends. It wouldn't bother me at all.

I do get a bit irritated if my own or the visiting child asks to watch TV when they should be playing! But then mine is only 5 and has endless energy so I guess it's what I expect them to do!

I should add that if they've been playing most of the day then fine. But in the first hour or two? No.

YABU. It's fine for them to do a bit of both. It's fun to watch a show or movie together,

Hmmm, a play date from 11-4 (sorry slight exaggeration to say all day), a film would take up most of that time.

But I’ll take it that it’s OK for them to have some time.

I personally think it’s a slight exaggeration to say it’s ‘mean’. What precious children we will have if being ‘denied’ a bit of TV ie classed as mean!

Ha just realised I used ‘mean’ in my OP.

Doh!

Kids' films are usually around 90 minutes or less so plenty of time to play. And mean seems like an entirely appropriate term.

So the consensus is IBU.

I’ll relax next time. Thanks MN for solving that one 😊

@AllPlayedOut

Kids' films are usually around 90 minutes or less so plenty of time to play. And mean seems like an entirely appropriate term.

Especially when I used the term in my OP. 🤣

As long as all parties are happy and enjoying themselves I don't care how much screen time they have. I see a play date as a fun treat not something that needs policing into a wholesome activity.

Sorry - crossed post. Didn't mean to be all 'cancel the cheque'.

Good on you for taking the comments so well. That isn't always easy to swallow.

I’m the same as you OP, I would expect them to play all day! I get a bit annoyed if my children have tea at a friends and all they have done is watch TV! I’m very strict with the TV though I don’t allow it until after 5pm.

I agree with you OP, the point is to play or hang out.

@GameSetMatch and @Puffinhead

I’m the same, very strict about TV (my choice and recognise other people’s choices) so it hard to strike a balance that is more usual.