Girlfriend is depressed.

[HannahLouise222222]

I'm a girl too btw.
Been together a year and with the coronavirus she feels her life is going nowhere as she has been furloughed and then is on the brink of losing her job.
She also crys about other stuff. It's like any minor problem and she crys.
She says she feels hopeless ect.

We don't live together but she's been crying on the phone a lot lately and most of the time she doesn't know what she's crying about.

This has happened a lot recently and she always says she's really sorry.
I am okay with this but sometimes I find it a bit tedious. But I do try my best to help her.
AIBU that this could come in the way of our relationship?

@user1473878824 i said i never realised 'people have it worse" was a bad phrase until this thread

It's a common phrase where I am:
"Chin up, could be worse"

Sorry I just really can’t understand how you can be 24 in 2020 and have the understanding of mental health of a Dickensian bad guy.

@user1473878824 that's a bit rude. I clearly stated that I didnt realise it was a bad thing to say.

YANBU OP. Best wishes to you both x

Also I don't see the problem with what you said OP. That would be a normal response by many people in my area.

OP I know a lot about mental heath and am very empathic and understanding in a professional capacity but would also find this tedious in a partner.

Especially if she isn't willing to seek any support.

I have suffered with depression and people telling me others have it worse never helped!

End things with your girlfriend and let her find a woman who understands and loves her for who she is

YANBU

You could offer all the support in the world and it will not be enough. People need to help themselves which includes taking medication/ going to counselling.

I split with an ex because she didn't seek help. Expected me to pay for everything as she refused to get a job because of her anxiety. Her anxieties soon cleared up if her friends wanted to go to the pub!

It is draining and tedious. There is nothing bad about ending a relationship because you feel unable to help someone with mental health problems. Relationships are meant to be fun and fulfilling especially after only a year.

I hate the phrase “other people have it worse” because taken to its natural conclusion you could say this to everyone in the world except one. I know it’s a fairly common phrase, and like many others people say it with no malice but to certain people hearing it it’s very painful, like asking a secretly infertile couple when are they having kids, someone who has had a traumatic birth “well at least the baby’s healthy” all well meaning but actually very painful comments. All intended to put a positive spin on something that the sufferer is viewing as a deep pit in hell. It’s one of those things that until people have come across they might not think about it.

Have you tried mind to see if they have any support for partners?