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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think if you rely on a food bank you may need to compromise your vegan principles?

791 replies

LondonUnited · 01/09/2020 21:30

I’m a supporter of our local food bank and am on their mailing list. I received an email earlier to say that they were supporting a vegan family and were therefore asking for specific food donations, including Oatly oat milk, various nuts and seeds, specific types of beans, etc etc.

I may get flamed for this but I couldn’t help thinking that - allergies aside (and I have a milk allergic child so I do get it) - if you need a food bank to feed your family, you might need to compromise on diet slightly? For a start, Oatly Barista is lovely and all that, but Aldi or Asda oat milk is also ok and half the price. And that the odd bit of tinned fish may be easier to access from a food bank than Brazil nuts and chia seeds...

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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ILoveFood87 · 02/09/2020 22:48

YANBU OP. Can get ridiculous.

Miljea · 02/09/2020 22:51

An interesting thread.

I also believe beggars can't be choosers.

Vegans/halal eaters relying on food banks can be as 'choosy' as they like, except when there's no choice at the food bank, surely.

What do they do then, them and their children?

This reminds me of the tattoo threads....

'People who judge others because they have huge, visible tattoos are 'vile!'. Maybe, but they can also choose not to hire you/ rent to you etc.

ILoveFood87 · 02/09/2020 22:52

I helped a lady with a weekly food parcel delivery during lockdown. Every week I took her food and picked stuff up for her. She complained every week she didn't like most of the donations she was given. She apparently could not afford food but had me going to the shop for fags and alcohol. I stopped helping her in the end she was pissing me right off.

Miljea · 02/09/2020 22:54

It also reminds me of the dimly recalled scene from Life of Brian where Reg's (?) right to have babies is upheld, despite his inability, as a man, to conceive.

ChanceEncounter · 02/09/2020 22:54

@EveryPlanetHasAYorkshire

I actually think Oatly is overrated. Their yoghurts are nice though.
Grin not what this thread is about, you need to either bash povs or endorse niche diets.
Yoholyolo · 02/09/2020 23:12

^Vegans/halal eaters relying on food banks can be as 'choosy' as they like, except when there's no choice at the food bank, surely.*

What do they do then, them and their children?

There will always be something edible even if only root veg , or weird chemical type foodstuff for the week, and they get to live of that, which will keep all from keeling over. In the end lowered nutrition may add to or cause health issues, but for now we have the NHS to deal with that so it gets pushed from state have outsourced to charity back to state funded to deal with the results.

MrsR2be · 02/09/2020 23:56

@TheFuckingDogs

Being Muslim/Jewish is a protected characteristic - being a vegan is not. Saying that it should be cheaper generally to feed a family with non meat requirements so shouldn’t be a biggie. Also further to that maybe we should just have a society that is more equal and fair and doesn’t make our humans rely on handouts so they don’t starve. . Just saying
Ethical veganism is a protected characteristic now, veganism isn't a diet choice, it's a lifestyle.
WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/09/2020 00:59

mathanxiety

I think you might have slightly misunderstood what I was saying. I did very much agree with your post, but I'm talking from the perspective of the recipient, not the donor.

IF those in need are indeed specifically requesting/expecting expensive brands/luxury items (which is far from clear in this particular scenario), I think they are out of order; but if people or local organisations decide to give/offer them very nice things, I don't in the least blame them for gladly taking them and I don't in any way believe they should feel guilty for that. It's all about the expectation and even entitlement that some people can demonstrate.

It's a truly wonderful thing to BE very generous wherever you can (whether with money, time, skills or whatever) but it's an ugly characteristic to just expect people to go right out of their way to provide you with whatever you may want - far above and beyond your reasonable needs - just because you feel like you deserve it.

SharonasCorona · 03/09/2020 03:52

Not sure the halal comparison is very useful, from the standard Trussel list someone posted upthread, it’s only tinned soup or meat that a Muslim person may not be able to eat/use, and that’s only if it has meat, given a lot of soups are vegetarian. Also perhaps some snacks.

breakfast cereals
UHT milk
Long-life fruit juice
Tinned / mashed potato
Soup
Pasta
Rice
Pasta sauce
Tinned beans
Tinned meat / vegetarian alternative
Tinned fish
Tinned vegetables
Tinned fruit
Tea or coffee
Sugar
Biscuits
Snacks
Toilet rolls

mathanxiety · 03/09/2020 03:55

I agree that people stamping their feet and demanding is unreasonable, but in general, very, very few people take the unreasonable stance that other people should go out of their way to provide the most expensive items available. The danger of a thread like this is that it contains the germ of an idea that many people using food banks are likely to be CFs taking the piss, demanding items above and beyond what donors can afford to give, and who might turn up their noses at affordable donations. It is far too easy to divide and conquer the British public by introducing the concept of entitlement into a discussion on charity, or welfare, or any area where there are perceived to be recipients and donors.

The interpretation that these specific people are entitled CFs because they asked for Oatly isn't necessarily the one true version of events here. They might have used Oatly as shorthand for a grain-based milk the way people use the word hoover in British English, or kleenex in American English. They might have a family member with autism who has very specific food preferences or a very low tolerance level for change to their diet. They might have allergies. They might have a very limited number of pots, pans, herbs, and spices in their kitchen, veggies growing in their garden and recipes in their collection, and might need specific beans, seeds, etc, to work with what they already have. These people asking for specific beans, nuts, and seeds might have specific dishes in mind for those ingredients that might last a week, whereas a tin of soup or a jar of pasta sauce might not. Just because you don't know what they might do with them doesn't mean that they are asking for luxury items that have no place in a nutritious diet.

The disparagement shown toward vegan dietary restrictions based on conscience, whether religious or secular in origin, reveals the eyebrow-raising assumption that only omnivores contribute to food banks. It is likely that people of many different faiths and none, and many different dietary preferences contribute to food banks. It is likely that in some areas food banks exist because of the civic spiritedness of people who are not omnivorous.

The question of 'deserving' or 'not deserving' and the deep suspicion that people are getting something for nothing when some of them shouldn't be is one that crops up frequently on threads to do with food banks (and charity generally) in the UK. I do not see that concept getting anything like that much airing on forums or online groups based elsewhere. It's very curious.

TheHappyHerbivore · 03/09/2020 06:07

@mathanxiety excellent post!

TheHappyHerbivore · 03/09/2020 06:08

It also reminds me of the dimly recalled scene from Life of Brian where Reg's (?) right to have babies is upheld, despite his inability, as a man, to conceive.

Genuinely unable to fathom what this possibly has to do with anything on this thread. Was this comment meant to be posted on a different one?

ChanceEncounter · 03/09/2020 06:15

The question of 'deserving' or 'not deserving' and the deep suspicion that people are getting something for nothing when some of them shouldn't be is one that crops up frequently on threads to do with food banks (and charity generally) in the UK. I do not see that concept getting anything like that much airing on forums or online groups based elsewhere. It's very curious.

The reason Dickens' work was notable was it shone a light on something real, and the same undeserving poor concept persists. We have a percentage of people who are very harsh and inhumane in their outlook.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 03/09/2020 06:23

The question of 'deserving' or 'not deserving' and the deep suspicion that people are getting something for nothing when some of them shouldn't be is one that crops up frequently on threads to do with food banks (and charity generally) in the UK. I do not see that concept getting anything like that much airing on forums or online groups based elsewhere. It's very curious. It isn't a UK thing. It's not even a European or Western world thing. It seems to be a 'a bit better off than those around me' human thing!

@TheHappyHerbivore the LoB comment makes sense if you step back a bit:

He can't have kids, he's a man! Oh yes he can, it's his human right!

They can't have a posh oat drink, they is poor! Oh yes they can, it's their human right!

Neither side of the argument needs to be exist! It is a ludicrous thing to argue about. Yet here we are.... 500+ posts later!

Mintjulia · 03/09/2020 06:30

I'm with you OP, especially on the brands. The only exception I'd make is if it was a medical requirement due to severe allergies, and then there is help available via the nhs.

Current economic problems mean food banks will have to stretch to help everyone, and baked beans on toast are cheaper than Brazil nuts (and environmentally less damaging).

Branleuse · 03/09/2020 07:02

The reason i think its shit, is the general public, mostly other working or lower middle class are the ones donating and are doing the governments job. Not only do we now have the responsibility of feeding the poor, we are now having to feed the poor top choice brands otherwise we are being mean about deserving/vs undeserving poor.

WhitePumpkin · 03/09/2020 07:17

[quote Potterpotterpotter]@TheHappyHerbivore I can afford my food, always have done so you won’t see me at the food bank but if I ever did go to one I’d be happy to get any items Aslong as they were edible because beggars can’t be choosers 🤷🏼‍♀️[/quote]
Yes I'm sure with your illustrious job role you're untouchable and completely entitled in being so judgemental and unkind Hmm we're incredibly fortunate but recognise that ANYONE can encounter misfortune, especially in this economy! Going to donate extra to my local food bank on your behalf @Potterpotterpotter

ClinkyMonkey · 03/09/2020 07:31

I can't believe the direction this thread has taken - or maybe I can. If the vegan family 'demanded' branded vegan products, then that was rather presumptuous of them. But we don't know that this is what happened. If it did, then the organisers of the food bank have made an error of judgement (albeit well meaning) by passing those 'demands' on to potential donors.

Perhaps the family asked for some vegan items and the food bank organisers asked for examples. They may have said 'well we use Oatly, but any brand will do', so volunteer duly notes down 'Oatly or similar', which in turn gets written into request as 'Oatly'.

Or something.

It's just depressing that some posters have been so quick to jump to conclusions which have resulted in pejorative language directed at fellow human beings who are likely in dire straits. References to beggars and cheeky fuckers. They should hang their heads in shame at their own bigoted attitudes.

Namara · 03/09/2020 07:39

This thread is sickening.

Times haven't changed since the middle ages or 19th century 'inspectors of the poor'.

What you should be asking is WHY do food banks even need to exist in this country !!

Clue: they shouldn't.

LoeliaPonsonby · 03/09/2020 07:39

It is possible to be empathetic towards people using food banks and at the same time, also think that if you’re in such a position to rely on food banks, there is an element of you get what’s available, not exactly what you like.

And anyone who’s ever dealt with the general public (including many food bank volunteers who’ve posted on this thread) the idea that a food bank user would be demanding brand goods is by no means unbelievable or unheard of. For every family that’s just grateful to be given something, there’s another of complete dickheads. And yet, food banks give them all something.

If you want others to avoid using inflammatory language such as “beggar”, and concentrate on the fact that they are just people, stop pretending that they are somehow perfect, principled specimens of humanity fallen on hard times. There will be posey vegans who are arseholes just as there are in the general population.

Namara · 03/09/2020 07:47

If it wasn't for charity , people would be starving

Really have a think about that.

What is wrong with this picture ??

mathanxiety · 03/09/2020 08:03

Not only do we now have the responsibility of feeding the poor, we are now having to feed the poor top choice brands otherwise we are being mean about deserving/vs undeserving poor.

You don't have to feed the poor top brands.

Give whatever you see fit.

But ask yourself why you think it's fitting.

MangoFeverDream · 03/09/2020 08:06

Also, if the food bank is funding this then that surely means they have less money available to feed other families?

This is a really good point

mathanxiety · 03/09/2020 08:06

For every family that’s just grateful to be given something, there’s another of complete dickheads.

So 50/50?

mathanxiety · 03/09/2020 08:11

For every family that’s just grateful to be given something, there’s another of complete dickheads. And yet, food banks give them all something.

Of course they give them all something. This is because the idea that only the humble deserve to be fed belongs in another century. Or so I would have hoped anyway.