To feel I don't know what I look like

[Happyinmyownworld]

Yesterday I put my makeup on. Estée Lauder foundation. Light blusher on my cheeks. Light beige eyeshadow. Mascara. Finished with some dusting pearls. Looked fine. Still slightly tired looking around the eyes. I just can't seem to find a nice brown eyeliner that doesn't smudge down my face through the day, so I've not worn any inockdown and I look abit bare. I straightened my hair and I was done.

Took my son for a walk. Tried to get a selfie with him in the woods. Turned my front camera around. Omg!! My makeup looked horrible. My face looked one colour and certainly not glowing. My long hair (overdue a cut) looked frizzy and like it hadn't been brushed or straightened. My cheek bones looked puffy adding to my tired eyes.

Now I'm under no illusions of being stunning or eye catching. But I am horrified I can look that hideous with a face of makeup on. Especially with Estée Lauder foundation!!!I keep my makeup light and fairly natural as I have dark aurborn hair and fair skin. The camera was showing all my imperfections. Spots that you couldn't see in the mirror were bumpy. Every strand of hair was visible. You couldn't see my blusher or mascara. I just looked like a tired minger who needs a hair chop. I left home feeling I looked fresh and my hair was tidy.

If I look like that, which I presume I did, I'm ashamed I go out. But also my profile pictures on Facebook that I take in the house don't look like that. I look fine. Admittedly some days I'll take loads to get the one. Or some days it's just not happening. I'm not a selfie queen by the way. It's the only way I get pics with the kids (body ever takes nice ones noooo)

So am I ugly as the mirror is a reflection and lies because we are flipped the other way.

Or is my out of date phone camera being cruel with the lightning.

Everyone else seems to look beautiful in pictures.

Spent all day feeling like an ugly minger

You could try the double wear light, apparently that stays on but isn't as mask-like.

Or, just get a decent primer. I use the Becca backlight one which makes my face stay on and has a glow effect. Then you can use any foundation you like. You could even try a tinted moisturiser (Nars) or a BB or CC (I like Eborian).

I've recently gone back to max factor colour stay foundation, long wearing and not flat, also cheap!

I was also going to ask if it was double wear. That’s heavy duty foundation. I would change it for something lighter. I use either Chanel ultra le teint and also Charlotte Tilbury, both stay in place all day.

All decent foundations stay in place, You just need to wear a primer first so they don’t Sink into your pores.

I’d bin the Dw. That’s your fundamental issue.

D4rwin

Why are you so unhappy with how you look? Have you thought about seeing someone about your self image?

But sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

I certainly recognise the feeling the OP has described. I've looked in the mirror, thought I looked okay then either taken a selfie or (which is worse) meant to photograph someone/thing else and had the camera on reverse so I see myself unexpectedly: yikes!

Surely giving a change of foundation a whirl first would be quicker and cheaper than embarking on therapy which she probably doesn't need, imo?

I did a zoom last week and was horrified how bad I looked, I have never liked photos of me.

It's universal.

I've never liked how I look in any photos. I am receiving some help with it. It might be a common experience, but its not healthy. The OP described herself as a "minger" that's a very strong insult to put on anyone. Vile.

Try doing your make up with your mirror in the window or something,so you can see what you look like in natural light

Thanks everyone. I was calling myself a minger in humour.

I've looked at Mac before but not sure which shade to go for. I have very fair skin. I will have to try out some other foundations. I've got half a bottle left and then I'll try something new. Feel free to suggest any you find effective.

I hope it's just the front camera being cruel in that lighting. It's not the best camera 📸 I'll tell myself that.

I will try a mirror Infront of the window. That's how I used to do it. Thanks!

I always try and do my make up in the light I will mostly be in, so lots of daylight for day, softer/dimmer lighting if I’m going out for the evening. Helps to get the heaviness right.

But double wear is very heavy foundation and will show things like lines easily if you don’t really know what you’re doing with it. Have a look at the Charlotte Tilbury magic foundation which is similar but not as heavy, or the CT light wonder for something lighter. A little bronzing can help sculpt the face too, without being super heavy

Should add - I like my face, I think I’m generally quite nice looking, and in confident putting make up on. I still hate most pictures of my face! Straight on selfies work for almost no one. So a bit of just general kindness to oneself is needed too!

Have you tried using an illuminating primer underneath the dw?

I use future dew from Glossier under mine and have a really hydrating skincare routine, Dw doesn't look flat on me irl as opposed to the bastard phone camera where I just look dreadful.

Do you know what I have realised about this, is that on the day I think I look awful if I take a couple of photos and look back at them weeks later, I don't look so bad for some reason. It's like it gives me the perspective to see it properly and instead of seeing myself as just gross, I can think, oh my hair was a bit wild there and my foundation was a bit too pale. Whereas I used to not take the photo and just think I looked terrible forever afterwards.

Omg seriously op don't worry about this, I can almost guarantee you look fine and probably gorgeous.

Try not to be so overly concerned by the way you look, easy to say, I know. We are our own worst critics.

We all have bad hair, skin, fat, tired, days. We all have days where we go out feeling and looking fabulous then we see a picture of ourselves or catch sight in a different mirror where we look bloody awful.

Some of the photos I thought I looked rough in from years ago (like literally cringed at!) I can now look at and think, I look so slim/young/happy etc. Or that was such a good day. And I don't see the imperfections at all. My too narrow eyebrows, my too thick eyeliner, my clumpy mascara, my wonky fringe, my patchy spray tan or pasty white complexion, my love handles and my yummy rolls, my spots, and scars and stretch marks, all those things didn't photography well in the sense that I don't see them in the photos at all anymore. Time and perspective have erased them

Do you know what I have realised about this, is that on the day I think I look awful if I take a couple of photos and look back at them weeks later, I don't look so bad for some reason.

Totally agree with this. I used to hate having my photo taken and always thought I looked terrible, but as I get older, I look back and in most of them I didn't look half bad.

Oh my lord you sound a bit appearance obsessed

I know a lot of people who wear quite a bit of makeup and really it only looks "good" in careful artificial lighting, in natural light it just looks garish and accentuates the natural bumps/hollows you are trying to hide.

Learn to love the skin you are in and don't worry what you look like in photos.

I'd be willing to bet that you'd look better with no make up on at all in a daylight photo than a full face of double wear.

Came on to say it’s the DW but other pp have already mentioned it!

It’s a nightmare of a foundation in pictures, especially with the flash on

I will look at the foundation suggestions thankyou.

Yes I'm sure you are right it's just a bad day. Thanks.

Not obsessed at all. Just wanted some other women's opinions and I've got some good advice on foundation from asking. Which made the post worthwhile. I just want to look nice when I wear makeup. I'm not wanting to look red carpet ready or anything. I'm quite low maintenance really.

DW is awful for flashbacks. That's why it shouldn't be used on brides for eg. Good Skin care and a good primer are so important. Illamasqua is a good foundation. MAC needs colour matched and oxidises a tad (turns orangey after a while) so you need to make sure you walk around in in after you get a patch test. Maybelline 24hr one with the white lid is a good coverage.

Daylight in the great outdoors is very unforgiving

As a pp said, most people look best outdoors with no foundation at all - that way your rosy cheeks can show and your skin looks natural and fresh.

If you have dark circles under your eyes, try drinking more water and getting more sleep :)

I've worn foundation pretty much every day for over 30 years but I've just weaned myself off it and just use a bit of concealer and blusher now. It still hides my dark circles and the odd blemish, but I think it looks better that I can see my actual skin iyswim.

Hi everyone. I borrowed my boyfriend's iPhone to take some pictures. I was shocked at the difference. He said I look more like the I phone but with more colour!

I showed him my phone pictures and he said no you definitely don't look like that. On my phone it also made me face thinner and longer. So it's just an awful lens it seems. I only have a Motorola! So it's not the latest phone. I smashed my Samsung