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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To insist that my friend doesn't go back to work on Tuesday without a negative covid test result?

253 replies

RingPiece · 29/08/2020 22:37

Teacher friend at a large inner city secondary school, says she's woken up feeling ill - sore throat, no sense of taste, temperature, shivers, etc. She's back to work on Tuesday. I've told her to get a covid test sent to her home and wait for the results before going back to work.

She said it's unlikely she'll get the test, send it back and get the results by Tuesday, as it's BH, and so will

'have to go in anyway , as it could just be a cold and I always go to work when I have a cold'

She also thinks she may be better by Tuesday.
Aibu in saying she really needs to get a test. Her school's huge and she'll come into contact with loads of staff on the Tuesday and then with the 90 children in her bubble on the Wednesday, not to mention all those commuters on her train and tube journey to and from the school.

OP posts:
newusername2009 · 30/08/2020 11:56

If she goes in and then a few days later tests positive the likelihood is a number of other staff who have been in meetings with her, eaten lunch near here, been in staff room etc will also have to quarantine. Much better for her to take the test ASAP and be back in on Wednesday. It’s not selfish to be careful.

PurpleDaisies · 30/08/2020 11:59

If you have been physically near this friend will you also be booking a test?

No, that’s not the requirement. It’s only if you yourself have symptoms.

If someone in your household or support bubble gets symptoms, you have to self isolate until they test negative.

If this teacher tests positive, the op only isolates if she is contacted by track and trace but takes extra care in the mean time.

RingPiece · 30/08/2020 12:09

FrippEnos

No, I've not actually seen her. We zoomed!

OP posts:
RingPiece · 30/08/2020 12:13

Well Zoomed, with a capital Z...!

OP posts:
RingPiece · 30/08/2020 12:14

Well, Zoomed, with a capital Z

OP posts:
RingPiece · 30/08/2020 12:20

So, she has tried to call HT. No answer, left a message but didn't explain just asked him to call her and will email with details. I think the stress of it all is actually making her feel worse. I remember only too well the panic I felt in the morning if I was feeling too ill to go to work. We had to call in by 7 at the latest and were normally met with a very annoyed sounding DHT who would sigh and say they'd have to find a supply. We were then told to call by three that same day to confirm if we were going to be in the next day or still going to be ill!!

Also her school has been deep cleaned so apparently people were told they couldn't go in over the summer to sort out classrooms, etc. She's a form tutor and was planning to go in tomorrow. She feels very under prepared but has done planning for the first two weeks back.

OP posts:
claireymrsd · 30/08/2020 12:29

I can't actually believe I'm reading this!

Of course she should get a test and self isolate until a negative result.

RingPiece · 30/08/2020 12:32

I can't actually believe I'm reading this!

Of course she should get a test and self isolate until a negative result

That's what she is going to do now.

OP posts:
MrsMariaReynolds · 30/08/2020 13:14

For all the people not bothering to RTFT--
1.) She.does.not.drive(!) Anyone here willing to offer her a lift to the drive-thru testing centre??? Didn't think so...
2.) She has ordered a test to be delivered tomorrow.

ilovesooty · 30/08/2020 13:35

@lifeafter50

Is she hoping to get the school closed by infecting others? There a lot of people on here just gagging for schools to closeto avoid work so the can crow 'Told you so' -maybe she is one of those.
Disgraceful comment.
Lightline · 30/08/2020 13:38

Your friends attitude just isn’t appropriate during a pandemic. I had the same issue at my work at the start of the outbreak at least three people were coming into work with a cough and fever! They have the outdated attitude of soldiering on. Really need to get a new outlook on working when unwell now.

FrippEnos · 30/08/2020 13:38

ilovesooty

Pretty much a normal response form that poster.

canigooutyet · 30/08/2020 13:51

And for those who missed the link - colds, chicken pox, flu and more.

www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/infections/how-long-is-someone-infectious-after-a-viral-infection/

Yes I know about the pressure some within schools put on staff. Yes I know how hard it is. I also know how easier it is thinking you know what, fuck you and your ideas, whilst I am doing as per my contract, nothing you can do.

Eventually they get bored and move on, change jobs, go on sick leave etc.

Who benefits from you doing your job when you are ill?

If you have a temp stay at home.

Remind them if people stayed at home then you wouldn't be off as much. Turn it all back on them. Ask what they are doing to reduce staff sickness, as a manager it is a part of their job.

Inkpaperstars · 30/08/2020 14:43

You're absolutely right OP that schools need to be clear about changing the attitudes and reactions about needing time off. I know it is going to cause schools problems but not as many problems as an outbreak, and it's essential staff feel able to be honest without being punished for it. I hope the head is reassuring about this to your friend.

SisyphusAndTheRockOfUntidiness · 30/08/2020 14:46

I am glad she has (more or less) seen sense & ordered a test. It's a shame it was the thought of disciplinary action, not the thought of spreading the virus & possibly being responsible for the death of the parent or grandparent of one of her pupils, that has changed her mind though. I agree the culture of presenteeism has an dreadful lot to answer for, & needs to change.

RingPiece · 30/08/2020 14:56

Her HOD has been tasked with contacting her and phoned her. I hope this isn't going to out my friend as if the HOD reads Mumsnet, she'll know I'm talking about her!

The HOD, I'm told, was very keen to establish that her symptoms were covid related and not 'just a cold'. She felt that she didn't believe her and has said that she hopes she tests positive just to prove her wrong. It's awful really.

OP posts:
TDGH1245ANON · 30/08/2020 15:12

What non teachers don't realise is that once you become 'inconvenient' through illness or whatever they treat you like an injured racehorse.... Another inconvenience and bang bang they shoot you down, bang bang you hit the ground...

MrsZola · 30/08/2020 15:16

I booked a test at a walk in centre yesterday, easy peasey, lots available. Should have my results in 48 hours, plenty of time before going back to school on Wednesday.

RingPiece · 30/08/2020 15:23

The problem is, MrsZola, is that she feels really quite ill and has a high fever so wouldn't be able to walk anywhere. Postal test is her only option and she's back on Tuesday so has had to say she might not be in until Thursday if she better and tests negative.

It is a sad fact that her absence will be partly accepted and understood and partly frowned upon.

OP posts:
ThatDamnScientist · 30/08/2020 15:27

@RingPiece

Her HOD has been tasked with contacting her and phoned her. I hope this isn't going to out my friend as if the HOD reads Mumsnet, she'll know I'm talking about her!

The HOD, I'm told, was very keen to establish that her symptoms were covid related and not 'just a cold'. She felt that she didn't believe her and has said that she hopes she tests positive just to prove her wrong. It's awful really.

Her HOD is disgraceful. What a nasty comment.
MarshaBradyo · 30/08/2020 15:29

I worry about HT having this attitude atm.

Maybe they need a bit of communication from above on what not to do and do.

RingPiece · 30/08/2020 15:30

I don't understand how so many posters are able to go to a walk / drive in test centre if they're ill. Are everyone's symptoms quite mild or is it that they have just come into contact with someone who's tested positive? What do people do if they're genuinely really very ill like my friend? She can't get out of bed without shivering and looked absolutely awful when I saw her online. Obviously a postal test is the only option and she has one coming but I worry for those who live alone who are too ill possibly to let anyone know.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 30/08/2020 15:32

I don't understand how so many posters are able to go to a walk / drive in test centre if they're ill

I only had a cough. I didn’t feel particularly ill.

PurpleDaisies · 30/08/2020 15:33

Are everyone's symptoms quite mild or is it that they have just come into contact with someone who's tested positive?

You aren’t tested for that reason. If you’re a contact, you isolate for 14 days or until you get symptoms and then you book a test.

Buttybach · 30/08/2020 15:38

In 2009 I was working in an office and all staff were told explicitly to not come in if you had symptoms of Swine flu!
Our office had a really shitty way of dealing with sickness absence. They even gave a man returning after beating stage 3 cancer... a disciplinary!!!

The girl who sat next to me thought she would end up with a disciplinary and came in despite having symptoms.
She passed it to 5 of us in the space of 3 hours until they sent her home.
Days later I came down with swine flu.
It was frankly terrifying! I'm asthmatic and I couldn't breathe but the local hospital told me they couldn't let me inside so sent a nurse out in a mask to see me. I genuinely thought it was going to kill me.

I now work in a school and you not only have to think about the other staff and pupils but their families also! Tell your friend to give her Covid infested head a wobble!