Recent thread about disposable income

[Clappingforjoy]

Okay taat but the recent one made me feel quite shitty due to the large amounts people on mumsnett seem to have.
Now I'm asking do we have anybody on here who really struggles.

@stirrups
We have only been this financially well off for the last 3 years, before that we were renting and had separate low paid jobs that meant we were living in overdraft every month.
Now, we are saving like mad and hope to have enough for a deposit soon to buy a property which we will let out until we need it. Taking on a mortgage at our age is also a bit scary.

Don’t feel shitty about things like that. Do you have a life that meets your needs. Some people nights have lots of money to spend on pointless shit but their husband sticks his dick in his secretary on a regular basis, or undermines their thoughts, is shit in bed, won’t help with the kids, can’t hold a decent conversation, spends weekends hitting balls with sticks before getting slaughtered and mistaking his missus’s head for another golf ball when he gets home. They might be dealing with their kids snorting powder of various sources up their noses. all looking very nice from the outside arriving at the school gates in head to toe Boden,

Comparison is the the of joy, work out what makes you happy, don’t try and mould your life on someone else’s instaGram profile.

Don't feel shitty OP I'm a millionaire online but that's not true either!

When I was younger I was skint counting every penny and never asked my parents for help.

Now in my 50's, married and we both work full time, our disposable income is around £3k a month.

Age is very important factor in this.

Ages and stages op, in my twenties I was working and paying my way through university and living in really horrible shared houses. In my fifties I am very comfortable. DH always had parental support and has never been hard up in his life. The kind of starts in life we had could have not been more different.

Child poverty action group probably still do this but they had a list of what they considered essential. This list had obvious stuff like secure decent housing and a warm winter coat but it had a few very low key things like celebrating birthdays. That’s not just about people having a bit of fun it’s so they can feel part of society and not marginalised.

Many people struggle op but in the instagram world of today people show an image to the world. They don’t show the debt they got in to. I think the pressure to show the world we are having a great time, and seeing alleged perfect people on social media is to the detriment of society.

I educated myself out of poverty, my sisters have no qualifications and have been in minimum wage jobs all their lives and face much harder retirements than me. Social mobility is harder now, my degree was worth more 25 years ago just because there were less of us around. One of my ex colleagues heads up the research office at a University. She earns around 55k, she has no degree, the junior secretaries she employs now have better on paper qualifications than her. No one will ever run that department again and work their way up like she did. Life seems much harder for younger people these days.

Absolutely no idea.

We bathe in champagne, we have it with caviar for breakfast, we lunch out every day and dinner is a five course meal served with silver service by uniformed staff. I dont know how to use the hoover or even a dish cloth ( I've only ever heard heard rumour of such things) and spend most of my day having massages at my exclusive spa while my children are cared for and educated at the best boarding schools in the country and dd is off to a Swiss finishing school next year..

Alternatively I'm lying my arse off

@DerbyshireGirly actually my happiest memories were when money was really really tight. The children were small and exH left me with the whole mortgage and childcare to pay so I just about managed scrape the essentials together. I think because the children were pre school age we just had a lovely time making up games at home and going on walks to the park. And friends would come and see me.

I was lucky though in that I could relax knowing that if a crisis really hit my parents had a big house and so we would never be on the streets. I think bit having that stress of "what if" made a big difference.

Those with huge childcare costs -grit your teeth and get through the early years and it will be worth it. I am in such a different situation now and all because I kept working even when I had no money left over after childcare and bills.

@Port1aCastis me too