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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Untreated chlamydia

26 replies

Sazzy877 · 21/08/2020 10:06

I am new to this so hopefully I posted in the right place.

I have had a really upsetting few days and I am just looking for any advice really. I was with my ex boyfriend for 7 years. We have been broken up for 1.5 year and I recently discovered he had been unfaithful pretty much throughout our relationship.

As if that wasn’t enough, I have tested positive for chlamydia. I decided to get tested after discovering he had been sleeping around. I hadn’t been with anyone before or since.

I have so concerned about what this means for me fertility and how much damage this has caused given I must have had it for potentially 8 years.

Can anyone offer any advice or been in a similar situation? I feel awful and can’t stop crying.

OP posts:

Slumcat · 21/08/2020 10:17

Hi I’m a sexual health practitioner, Firstly to you, can I suggest you contact your local sexual health clinic and speak to a nurse or health advisor there, they should be able to reassure and explain the infection in depth to you.
I will says it’s unlikely to effect your fertility, it’s those who have had repeated Untreated infections that can lead to issues, But please contact the clinic,

Original poster

Sazzy877 · 21/08/2020 11:05

Thanks Slumcat.

I managed to get an appointment in a couple of few weeks time. I guess I am so distressed given the length of time I could have had it for and research indicating that it leads to PID and tubal infertility. I would hate to think that something like this will damage my hopes of becoming a mother one day. I haven’t had any real symptoms of PID but I know that’s lots of times it can be asymptomatic and I am really worried that it’s been there for years causing a lot of damage. I have never felt so low in my life.

OP posts:

Liverbird77 · 21/08/2020 13:20

Thank God you're rid of that horrible man. Also thank God it's "just" Chlamydia...it could've been much worse!
I have no practical advice, apart from to say please do go and talk to a medical practitioner, but wanted to send you a hug.

Original poster

Sazzy877 · 21/08/2020 16:36

Thanks Liverbird. It’s just another heartache for me really.

OP posts:

sjk17 · 21/08/2020 18:08

It’s only chlamydia. Go get yourself treated. It goes away. Why don’t straight people get themselves tested regularly? I’m really curious to know. Gays are encouraged to get tested regularly. But straights not. Yet they have as much unprotected sex as gay people. I don’t get it. Please explain.

CandyLeBonBon · 21/08/2020 21:54

@sjk17 no need for the snarky passive aggressive crap. It's coming across badly.

Toughtips · 21/08/2020 21:59

I'd get checked. My auntie got given chalmydia by her unfaithful husband she couldn't have kids because of it. Hopefully yours isn't severe. X

GenevaL · 21/08/2020 22:47

SJK17, OP was being cheated on and you’re banging on like she brought it on herself. People in exclusive and trusting seven year relationships have absolutely no reason to think that they need to get regular checks, so why be so judgemental?

OP, the infertility risk typically comes from the tubes being left damaged or scarred and they can do a simple test to check for blockages by flushing a dyed solution through them to see if it passes. To get this test AFAIK you need to have been unsuccessfully trying for a baby for a period of time. However, given your degree of worry, I’d simply tell them that you have been trying.

Steppingonrakes · 21/08/2020 23:00

I was distraught when my GP phoned to say I’d tested positive for chlamydia too. I’d taken a urine sample in as I had bad UTI symptoms and absolutely was not expecting to hear that. My GP prescribed a course of doxycycline (think it was 14 days of it) and I was fine.

Can you call your GP on Monday to discuss getting tested to check your fertility and see if they will prescribe you antibiotics? Because you are so distressed it’s awful to have to wait weeks for an appointment. I’m so sorry you are going through this and really hope there aren’t any long term effects.

3kidsandcounting89 · 22/08/2020 00:46

I caught this from my ex husband when I was carrying his baby. It was absolutely traumatic and I'm so sorry you're going through this. I was terrified it would harm my baby but thank god it didn't. Sitting in that clinic with my baby bump was horrendous. I have everything crossed for you, try not to worry its rare that it effects your fertility and I suspect you would have had more severe symptoms if it had got to that stage.

Yolande7 · 22/08/2020 01:04

Do not have your tubes tested by flushing. The flushing itself carries a risk, can cause an infection and due to that infertility.

Original poster

Sazzy877 · 22/08/2020 09:46

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate all your responses. I have been given antibiotics and am taking them now. My appointment in a couple of weeks is to have some initial fertility checks. I don’t think the dye test was mentioned though? Would I have to be actively trying to conceive to get this done? Or could I go privately and have this done regardless?

It is strange to be going for these checks when I am not trying to conceive. I just want to know if there is a lot of damage and if I will likely need IVF in the future what the options are and whether I should store eggs now.

OP posts:

ClaraJude · 22/08/2020 10:04

Don’t be an arsehole. This is not the place or time for an aggressive interrogation about STI testing when the OP is someone who thought they were in a long term, monogamous relationship and who was badly betrayed and lied to. She doesn’t owe you or anyone an explanation in respect of questions which have nothing to do with her situation.

Pinkflowers19 · 22/08/2020 10:10

I'm not sure about the tests but I was exactly like you. I was so terrified like yourself after searching the Internet. I was told by a doctor that pid is almost always painful and causes symptoms. I now have a healthy 1 year old dd (new dp obviously) with no problems conceiving her. Hope that helps op

Strawberrypip · 22/08/2020 10:15

you poor love - my current partner gave me chlamydia right at the beginning of our relationship, I can only have had it for 3/4 weeks but I had this worry too - can only imagine the torment you are feeling without knowing how long you had it. please know that even if you have had it a while it doesnt definitley equal PID and PID doesnt definitley equal infertility. take comfort in those who have had it and havent struggled to concieve. it is highly likely you will be one of them too.

as for you ex, I hope he gets gangrene and his dick falls off.

sending hugs

iwantmyownicecreamvan · 22/08/2020 10:16

Please explain Who do some people think they are? You aren't setting an exam question.

Nobody owes you an explanation and how is the OP expected to know why others don't get tested?

SurreyHillsGirl · 22/08/2020 10:33

@iwantmyownicecreamvan
Please explain
Who do some people think they are?

So twatty isn't it. I find on these threads that it's a given that there will be one arsehole offering nothing constructive amongst the many helpful, supportive comments. It's like MN law or something.

SurreyHillsGirl · 22/08/2020 10:34

as for you ex, I hope he gets gangrene and his dick falls off

I second that. Good luck OP, hope everything is ok

vanillandhoney · 22/08/2020 10:41

@sjk17

Did writing that post make you feel better or superior in some way? What was the point other than to make the OP feel even worse?

Chloemol · 22/08/2020 10:57

@sjk17

Nasty comment

VettiyaIruken · 22/08/2020 11:03

OP, you owe fuck all explanation to anyone.
You were faithful in a supposedly committed relationship for nearly a decade. You bear no fault here!

Nottherealslimshady · 22/08/2020 11:06

@sjk17 why be a dick? She was in a relationship. You dont expect to be being cheated on so why would you keep getting tested? The only tests I've had were routine when getting contraception.

OP it's scary to know something has been in your body wreaking havoc for a long time without you knowing, but you haven't had any symptoms so try to stay calm. They'll do some tests for you to put your mind at ease. The chances are that everything is fine and it'll go away.
So sorry your ex was a worthless piece of shit, you deserved better.

Original poster

Sazzy877 · 22/08/2020 15:29

Thanks everyone for the kind and supportive responses. They have really helped - you are all so lovely.

My main concern is the length of time I have had it my system and it being untreated. I suppose I am doing all I can now and being proactive about it.

OP posts:

Steppingonrakes · 22/08/2020 16:40

Really glad you are on antibiotics already. It really helped me to know that I was taking something to get the infection out. Like I said I was distraught to get the diagnosis and no one should minimise just how upset and worried it can make you. It’s really good you have fertility tests arranged and I really hope they will put your mind at rest. You are absolutely doing all you can.

PoodleMoth · 22/08/2020 18:09

You are doing all you can, I hope you get the reassurance you need. Well done for being so proactive and good luck

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