To not to want to teach an adult education class when I have been victimised by one of the students in a pervious class?

[NorwichMummy]

Phew, long title but it gets the jist across! In a nutshell I teach for a Continuing Education department at university for years and have always been complimented for my teaching. Whilst I was pregnant with ds I had a student who was really nasty to be, to the point it was turning into victimisation. I ended up withdrawing from teaching half way through the term I was so upset and have not taught since. Ds is now 17mo and I supposed to start a new course next week. I've been told today that the student in question has enrolled again and that he has been warned about his behaviour. The thing is that I really don't want to teach if he is in my class and the whole thing has really upset me. I don't want to let any other student down but am terrified about teaching this person. I have made my feeling clear to my boss who has offered to have someone sit in class, but is unwilling to withdraw the student from the class unless he actually does something. The thing is it is something I do for pleasure rather for any financial gain so should I be allowing myself to get so unhappy over this and do something that is potentially going to stress me out. I now feel sick with the worry rather than the sense of positive optimism and excitement I had up to about an hour ago.

AIBU?

whoops, I meant previous in the title!

try and see it as an opportunity to overcome what he did to you? Last time you were pregnant, hormonal and underneath perhaps feeling vulnerable. This time it's different you are in control and you can get him kicked out as soon as he steps a foot wrong?

Refuse to do it ,they are been yoyally unreasonable IMO to expect you to teach someone who has treat you like this previously .
There is no point in doing it if he is going to stress you out so much he sounds like a total n*b TBH

have you told them you refuse to teach this individual?

Agree with pyjamagirl. I also find it odd that he would enrol in your class again - looks a bit stalkerish (although obv. I've no idea what type of class it is).

it may teach him a salutory lesson about previous actions having consequences too

no-one can force you to be in the same room as an abuser, let alone help him

although it might be beneficial for you to try to forgive him, so that all his power over you has gone

Was the vicitimisation not enough for him to be asked to leave the course?

Well done for getting back to the teaching!

But ... YANBU! What exactly do the University mean when they say he has to 'do something' to be turned away? I find that a bit sinister. Are you a member of the union? They might be able to advise you. If you withdrew from teaching last time then there is clear evidence he is a problem.

I agree with the other poster who said it was a bit stalker-ish, but that might be over-dramatic.Is he a student who does courses every year? Is he a problem for other tutors? IME (teaching evening class & undergrads) these sorts of people tend to pick on women and also ruin classes for everyone involved.

I think I would make it clear that I am not prepared to teach that particular student full-stop.

I find it unreasonable of your boss to expect you to teach this man.

Awkward that the class is due to start in a week's time.

I have made it clear that I do not want to teach this person Eddie. The victimisation was getting really bad and then he withdrew from the course, citing my teaching style as his reason. But by that point I had had enough and just didn't want to continue the course.

I have been wondering why he has enrolled when he obviously had such a problem with me in the past. It does strike me a slightly odd in many ways.

I teach Art History btw

Right off to get ds from his CM!

when he re-enrolled was it clear that you would be the teacher?

Yes, it was. None of the literature goes out to students until the tutors are formalised. Especially in my case as what I do is quite specialised and I'm the only one in the department who does it (classical statuary). In fact I have just emailed by academic director to ask him what the reason he has given for re enrolling, knowing I was the tutor

what sort of victimisation was it. insiduous or outright rudeness? you could just stop the class everytime he insults you and the rest of the class will get pissed off at him until he leaves.

what union involvement has there been ? you union rep should be in on this. They can advise you on where you stand legally. Also I take it that you kept a formal record of incidents involving this person and you have copies? make sure everything goes down on paper.
It may also be a good idea to inform you r employers that any further approaches by this person and you will contact the police to lodge a formal complaint of harrassment. They will NOT want the police involved.

seeing as you did not get him kicked out last time and if you are working for a big university/college i doubt there will be anything you could do before the class started as he would then claim victimisation/bias on your part and that the college were denying him an education. had it been dealt with fully the first time round i'd imagine you would have a better grounding. but as it is i'd imagine the most backing the college can give you is offering someone to sit in on your class to monitor his behaviour and guarenteeing that should he step out of line again he will be disciplined.

(if you did deal with it fully the first time round and he was disciplined ignore my post)

Sorry for delay in replying not been having the best of times! W&B the matter was dealt with as far as it could go last time, but because he had withdrawn volunteraily from the course they could not institute displinary procuedures against him. Furthermore I have heard o the grapevine that he has done this to other (female) tutors. Basically criticising and belittling them in class, under breath comments, etc... for a few weeks, then one really nasty, critical confrontation in class followed by a storming out and withdrawing from the class, citing the tutor's teaching style as his reason for leaving. From what I can gather he has not actually finished a course with a female tutor.

I have asked for someone to be there for the first session but no one is free, wtf?!

He sounds like a total nightmare I can imagine exactly what he's like! Do you think he knows how to work the system by dropping out before he gets disciplined? Fingers crossed he will drop out of your course but of course you have to put up with him in the meantime.

And it is totally typical of the University to whimp out on confronting. I taught a total fruitcake once, who was well known for harassing female tutors, students, admin staff (had been doing so for 4 years). The only way they got rid of him was when he switched to another department! It souunds like no one in Adult Education is willing to take responsibility. I would keep nagging for someone to sit in and don't let them get away with it.

Remember harassment is defined by what it makes the victim feel, rather than what the harasser does.