To think it's easier for them to visit me?

[Rosebel]

If you have a baby is it reasonable to expect people to visit you rather than the other way round? I have had family and friends ask to see,the baby (who is 9 weeks) but when I suggest they come round they all seem to want me to go to them. So either I end up at home isolated and alone or packing up a load of stuff and travelling to see people.
When other people have had babies I have always asked if they want me to visit or they'd rather come to me.
I find it so much easier to be at home with all his stuff but am feeling a bit cut off as only my parents will visit me.
Does anyone else feel the same or maybe your friends and family are more understanding!

Take it in turns? I would never expect people to always come to me.

At 9 weeks its not like you have to take toys, just milk, nappies, wipes, muslin,change on clothes - all fits in a changing bag

Of course it's easier for them to visit you unless they are housebound.

Yes, of course. What are their reasons for not coming to you?

I don't have children but when my friends/family have had babies I definitely expected to visit them. Not the other way around.

Maybe they think you fancy a change of scenery, I used to like going to others. If not, just ask them to come to you.

To be honest, I always preferred to visit other people, then have to tidy and be ready for visitors. My house looked like a bomb had gone off for at least 3 months after having each baby.

Or a compromise, put baby in buggy or sling, and go for a walk together somewhere nice, probably safer option at the moment anyway.

They should come to you. Unless you have elderly relatives who can't travel. I would make an exception in that case and go to them.

Exactly the same here, family expects me to take my five month old to them, not too sure why really. I think they assume it's easy to take a small baby out but it really isn't (and I'm more comfortable at home especially with feeding etc)

I was always happy to go to other people - meant I had to do zero tidying and cleaning! It's a bit different when you've got a toddler who only wants to play with Great Aunt Vera's trinkets in which case them coming to you is the easier and safer option.

With a new baby, absolutely they should be coming to see if you allow them in. i would be wary of visiting someone with a new baby just now though and would probably suggest meeting outside somewhere mutually convenient so that there is a lower health risk.

Of course they should visit you, unless you fancy a change of scenery.

Eh yabu

It's unreasonable to expect them to always visit you

You have a baby not a ball and chain

I actually much prefer going to other people as I’m free to leave whenever and don’t risk anyone out staying their welcome. A newborn is slightly different as you don’t want to be dragging yourself about when you’re sore and tired but I actually found leaving the house really good for my mental health. I think it’s perfectly reasonable to ask people to come to you if you feel more comfortable that way.

It's unreasonable to expect them to always visit you

Good job she’s not then, did you bother to read the OP? She’s always visiting other people.

You’re absolutely right OP. What happens if you say “We’d love to see you, easiest if you come here, how’s Tuesday at 3?” If they say it’s easier for them to have you over just reiterate that you’d prefer them to come to you.

Typically, people visit the new family. There are exceptions obviously, but I would expect healthy relatives to do the traveling.

I agree with you, I would always visit the person if they have a new baby

@AnneLovesGilbert

It's unreasonable to expect them to always visit you

Good job she’s not then, did you bother to read the OP? She’s always visiting other people.

You’re absolutely right OP. What happens if you say “We’d love to see you, easiest if you come here, how’s Tuesday at 3?” If they say it’s easier for them to have you over just reiterate that you’d prefer them to come to you.

Oh I did read it

The OP might go and visit others but the expectation is that guests should visit her because it's 'easier'

Which is unreasonable

Have you had a baby dwiz8?