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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think I'd be the worst witness to a crime ever?

58 replies

Howallergic · 18/08/2020 23:11

I always can't remember whether people wear glasses or whether they have beards for e.g.
I see people, not their physical attributes.
I wouldn't have a clue what someone was wearing.
I'd be a useless witness.

Anyone else the same?

OP posts:
Oneborneverydecade · 18/08/2020 23:13

I have aphantasia so I'd be useless. I can even recall an image of an elephant Confused

chocdonuty · 18/08/2020 23:16

Me, it's terrible at work when you need to return to a customer within a couple of minutes yet have no idea what they look like!
I do try and note on paper/a receipt a brief description ie blue stripey top/red coat which helps a little.

longwayoff · 18/08/2020 23:18

Yes. It's a secret dread that I'm asked to be a witness, I am very unobservant. Don't notice details about people unless required to. Other than noticing whether male or female I'd be completely useless.

SaintofBats · 18/08/2020 23:19

So what is it you see, OP, if not people’s physical attributes?

GreenGordon · 18/08/2020 23:20

@chocdonuty

Me, it's terrible at work when you need to return to a customer within a couple of minutes yet have no idea what they look like! I do try and note on paper/a receipt a brief description ie blue stripey top/red coat which helps a little.
Yep, me too!
Drat123 · 18/08/2020 23:21

Me! I'd struggle to recall what age group they fall into, estimation of their height or weight and I am totally useless with distances.

JamieLeeCurtains · 18/08/2020 23:22

I can't tell most people apart in most recent films.

I think they should have to wear hats with their names on.

One day there will be hovering 'Nan' subtitles for people like me. Massive arrows pointing down to actors' heads at the click of a button, saying, 'This one's her off of the Boleyn Girl, you know, the one who isn't the other one, the one who did that film you like.'

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches · 18/08/2020 23:22

Oh God I’d be terrible.

In fact I was - I witnessed a robbery once and I was sure the robbers were white when everyone else said they were black - including the victim who obviously saw them up close and was black herself (so she was not just being racist).

I wasn’t called as a witness surprisingly!

Howallergic · 18/08/2020 23:24

So what is it you see, OP, if not people’s physical attributes?

Nothing tangible. I'll remember whether they were friendly, hostile, well dressed or not, but it's a general feeling I get rather than details. I'll remember how they speak, an accent (though probably wouldn't recognise the accent). I seem to 'see' people rather than see them. I'm also useless with names.

OP posts:
Howallergic · 18/08/2020 23:25

Jamie - I'm the same with films. If they've two white actors, I can't tell the difference so I can't follow the storyline as I can't tell who is doing what!

OP posts:
minou123 · 18/08/2020 23:26

Yes, me too
Especially height. I'm only 5 ft, in my defence, everyone is tall to me!

Whenever I'm asked how tall someone is, I say "oh, very tall".- they turn out to be 5ft 3
That's tall to me.

Doingtheboxerbeat · 18/08/2020 23:27

I don't have that condition as such but I am curious about how sketch artists can get a likeness of a suspect based on a witnesses description. I would like to meet one and see how I got on describing my DM for example.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 18/08/2020 23:29

Yeah, I'm short and ancient so people are either 'tall' 'small as me' (ie a child), 'stupidly young' (anyone under 40) or 'ancient'.

WinterAndRoughWeather · 18/08/2020 23:29

People generally don’t remember stuff well, that’s why it’s so easy to coerce false confessions out of people and obtain unsafe convictions.

ThePawtriarchy · 18/08/2020 23:31

There’s a thing called face blindness that sounds similar to this OP and I struggle with it too.

tillytoodles1 · 18/08/2020 23:31

My daughter worked at KFC and was putting stuff in the bin outside when the building society next door was raided by armed robbers. They ran past her into the underground subway and when the police arrived and she had to tell them she hadn't even noticed them.

CardsforKittens · 18/08/2020 23:33

I also have problems with faces and thought I would be an awful witness, but when I actually had to identify someone who assaulted me I was able to do it. Even though I didn’t recognise his face in the ‘normal’ way I had an emotional response to seeing him. He then admitted the assault and was sentenced to a couple of years in prison. So, depending on the situation, you might be a better witness than you think.

aLilNonnyMouse · 18/08/2020 23:40

@JamieLeeCurtains

I can't tell most people apart in most recent films.

I think they should have to wear hats with their names on.

One day there will be hovering 'Nan' subtitles for people like me. Massive arrows pointing down to actors' heads at the click of a button, saying, 'This one's her off of the Boleyn Girl, you know, the one who isn't the other one, the one who did that film you like.'

Amazon prime already does this! Click a button during any film/program and it will list all the actors in that scene and what else they have been in. Great for when you can't concentrate for wondering where you know them from.
Cooroo · 18/08/2020 23:41

Face blindness is called prosopagnosia. The worst affected can't recognise their own family.
I'm terrible at recognising people out of context, and differentiating between film characters if they have similar hair.

BreconBeBuggered · 18/08/2020 23:45

I called the police some years ago about a young man using threatening language during a fight on my street. I called them to report that he'd said he was getting a knife, naively thinking they'd turn up to intercept the angry lad in the orange jacket heading south, and that my part in the matter was over. Of course it was a good fortnight before anyone showed up, and they wanted details from me I hadn't even noticed, some of which he could easily have changed in the interim anyway. I felt so useless.

lyralalala · 18/08/2020 23:49

When I was still at school the corner shop I worked in got held up. One guy had a gun and the other a knife (there was a sub post office in the shop and they didn't take into account it wasn't open all the same hours as the shop).

My Nana and the lovely lady in the Procurator Fiscal's office couldn't help laughing when the only thing I could remember was tha the one who had the knife was wearing a black jacket, and that the cuffs were a slightly darker black than the rest of the jacket. That was it. 12 minutes staring at them both and that was my only evidence.

Turns out one of them had a green and yellow scarf around their face and I didn't even notice.

NiceGerbil · 18/08/2020 23:49

I have aphantasia as well!

Was on the wrong end of an armed robbery when young. Police said what did he look like. I had zero idea!

So yes I was a shit witness. I can't remember stuff like that,, no visual memory.

sorryforswearing · 18/08/2020 23:50

I’m so pleased it’s not just me. I teach and when I get a new class it takes me months to match up the parent with the child at home time. I originally wanted to go in the police force. It would have been a disaster. If I ever witnessed a crime I wouldn’t have a clue if I had to make an identification.

JamieLeeCurtains · 18/08/2020 23:59

Amazon prime already does this! Click a button during any film/program and it will list all the actors in that scene and what else they have been in. Great for when you can't concentrate for wondering where you know them from

Oooh interesting @aLilNonnyMouse

Although it still doesn't solve not being able to tell actors apart ...

JE17 · 19/08/2020 00:01

I was discussing this with DH yesterday when we were out with the dog. Somebody was following us but suddenly disappeared into the woods. We had both seen the person, but I was convinced it was a man and DH said it was a woman. When we tried to describe the person, the most we could agree on was „dark clothing“. If the person was involved in anything dodgy, they can rest assured that we won’t be witnesses against them.