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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feeding builders

94 replies

CourseTheyWere · 18/08/2020 15:38

We are getting some work done to our bathroom this week. The builders turned up today and seem very pleasant. They arrived at 10 and left at 2.

I have made them three cups of coffee each, they have been provided with bottled soft drinks to help themselves. I bought them a packet of biscuits and I bought them a pasty from the local shop each.

When they left one of them was complaining that he was starving. He then told me he didn’t like the biscuits I’d bought so hadn’t been able to eat any of them. He informed me that he only liked hobnobs.

Have I committed some awful faux pas and not fed them enough? I didn’t realise that you were meant to provide all meals to people doing work in your house, as this is the first major work I’ve had done on my own.

AIBU and should I get more food for tomorrow?

OP posts:
paap1975 · 18/08/2020 16:19

It's definitely not down to you to provide their lunch.
We would usually provide one cup tea/coffee in the morning and one in the afternoon. Sometimes biscuits or something I've baked.
If you were out at the office, they wouldn't be getting anything

keepingbees · 18/08/2020 16:23

They were only with you 4 hours! That barely even warrants a break. You gave them more than enough CFers!

JemimaTiggywinkle · 18/08/2020 16:24

They sound unbelievably cheeky... even the appreciative one. I can’t believe he took the packet of biscuits home!

When I have builders in I lay out mugs/spoons/tea/coffee/sugar and one packet of biscuits next to the kettle and tell them they’re welcome to help themselves.

I would also offer them a cup of tea every couple of hours if I was in the house. That’s it. The biscuits would be expected to last a couple of days and wouldn’t be replenished!

PatchworkElmer · 18/08/2020 16:27

Depends what you’re having done I guess. Ours was basically the complete gutting of the whole house. I tended to just leave a kettle out for them, with milk in a thermos and a box of tea bags and biscuits- made them a drink on day 1 and then told them to help themselves afterwards.

Blankblankblank · 18/08/2020 16:27

I’m obviously in a minority. I’ve always been told that if you feed them they go all out, possibly do a couple of extra things if you ask nicely & clean up better etc.

Mine get bacon butties, cups of tea & biscuits then sandwiches, crisps & cake. I’ve never had them until really late, but I don’t think I’d go as far as to offer them an evening meal Grin

Cocomarine · 18/08/2020 16:28

He took the biscuits with him?!!! Shock
Blimey.
I didn’t give my builder that much when I was shagging him 🤣
Hot drink only as often as you’re putting the kettle on for yourself.
Biscuits once a day if you want to,
Pasties? Never.

Burnthurst187 · 18/08/2020 16:30

10:00-2:00, nothing like a good, hard full days graft Hmm

Why are you providing food and drinks? Are you a drop in centre for homeless people?

echodot · 18/08/2020 16:37
Biscuit
Coulddowithanap · 18/08/2020 16:37

I do a bit of labouring and its not normal for customers to provide that many drinks in such a short time, and you shouldn't be expected to provide food.

One of the recent jobs I've done we were given coffee on arrival, 11ish, lunchtime then 3ish. That would be on an 8am till 4.30pm day and working outside in the sun all day so really appreciated the extra drinks.

Mostly we are shown where the kettle etc is and what cups to use. Sometime a packet of biscuits would be left out, never expected them and certainly wouldn't complain if they aren't ones we like, also wouldn't take them home either!

A few regular customers will make the odd bacon sandwich and some will give us a slice of cake when they are baking.

ivykaty44 · 18/08/2020 16:39

I’ve got builders in and they brought me an ice cream 🤣
Tea and coffee provided and some biccies

BackforGood · 18/08/2020 16:40

I haven't voted as I think it could be taken the wrong way.

I think YWBU to provide as much as you did
In my house for 4 hours, they'd have had 2 coffee /teas each and that's it.
It's not up to you to provide them with food Hmm

I'd also have asked if they were planning to do a full day tomorrow. I mean I know sometimes you have to leave something to dry, or some longer jobs need doing all in one go, but 4 hours when you are having a whole bathroom replaced, is taking the mick. You might not be paying by the day, but you are living without a bathroom for the day.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 18/08/2020 16:44

When we had guys working on our patio I offered hot drinks in the morning, and in the afternoon. They were able to access the utility room if they wanted water. They had lunch with them every day, and sat in their van reading the papers/on their phones to eat it.

On their last day DP was home too and offered them a bacon roll because we were having, and they were delighted with that.

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches · 18/08/2020 16:45

I would normally give tea/ coffee on arrival , and show them where the kettle tea coffee etc is for top up. I tend to leave a jug of milk and the sugar etc.

Then I’d buy a packet of biscuits or whatever for them, but I’ve never bought pastries/ pastries or anything else. You definitely don’t have to provide lunch.

I think he’s a CF but perhaps, to give them benefit of the doubt, he meant “I’m starving so I’m off to get my lunch” or something? Even as I type that it sounds far fetched!

FizzyPink · 18/08/2020 16:53

I can’t believe he took the biscuits home with him 😂

@Cocomarine I’m intrigued how you came to be snagging the builder! Was that an additional bit of hospitality you offered or were you shagging before he became your builder??

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 18/08/2020 17:08

MrCarpet was a builder for many years (retired now) and he was always grateful for a cuppa and the occasional biscuit. He certainly would never have taken the packet home though. And he'd never have moaned about the biscuits, even in jest.
It might be different here, but standard breaks are 10am tea break and then half an hour for lunch and the rest of the time they should be working.
I'm having some building work done next week and probably will provide tea/coffee and snacks. Usually I'd also give them bacon rolls, but that's because MrCarpet and his nephew would normally be doing the work! This is a more specialist job so the builders are coming from elsewhere.

Serendipity79 · 18/08/2020 17:13

I would only be offering tea/coffee tbh. Although when I had workers in last year doing garden work I did also provide bottled water as it was really hot.

But I do also find that food is often the way to a trademan's heart -- I once got a tree that was blocking my view form my kitchen cut down by some gardeners in exchange for a bacon sarnie each while they were doing landscaping work on the estate :)

Jaxhog · 18/08/2020 17:37

You don't have to feed builders! They can bring their own sandwiches or, as some of mine did, their own little rice cooker. And they get the biscuits you have. Hobnobs, indeed!

DishingOutDone · 18/08/2020 17:42

I too think you were unreasonable like @BackforGood - to provide all that, how on earth did they have a chance to work whilst having to eat pasties etc and have all those drinks?! Are you quite young OP or not had any workmen at the house before?

On the one hand its a bit silly of you, on the other you're almost flagging yourself up as a soft touch. I hope things are ok tomorrow; there's a thread on here where someone is currently having an awful time with builders and I can't help but think they might start complaining if you don't lay out another spread (with correct biscuits) in the morning.

Cocomarine · 18/08/2020 17:45

@Turnedouttoes

I can’t believe he took the biscuits home with him 😂

@Cocomarine I’m intrigued how you came to be snagging the builder! Was that an additional bit of hospitality you offered or were you shagging before he became your builder??

Additional hospitality 🤣 He came to quote, I liked what I saw - what more can I say?! He actually became a boyfriend during the work - my house needed so much doing to it, that the professional relationship outlasted the personal though. Fortunately we stayed friends! I did get him expensive biscuits - but he made his own lunch Smile
Eggplant6 · 18/08/2020 17:54

No more biscuits, pasties or soft drinks. He's shown he can't be trusted to behave like civilised people by taking them home!

It's a careful balance of being home enough to show you are aware of their arrival and leaving times, but not too available for making hot drinks all day. One at coffee time is enough. They can bring flasks. Or give them a kettle, mugs and milk and leave them to make their own.

Tomorrow, be there when they arrive, give them a kettle and then go out for a bit.

maddy68 · 18/08/2020 17:57

Actually under covid guidelines I don't think they're allowed to accept drinks let alone food.
Stop with the food entirely. I'd they make any comment just say "well you don't like my biscuits"

I would definitely still make them drinks. But food is their own responsibility

Tobebythesea · 18/08/2020 18:06

Provide a kettle and let them crack on making their own drinks.

We had a group of builders in who supposedly only drank cafetiere coffee. After the first day and 16 sodding cups later and trying to look after my 3 month old at the same time with little sleep I put my foot down. Cheeky.

isseywith4vampirecats · 18/08/2020 18:09

they are just been cheeky we have had work done on our house recently and apart from offering a drink i didnt feed the platserer or the electrician, only fed the kitchen fitters lunch because one is my ex son in law and the other one is his son my grandson

Rosspoldarkssaddle · 18/08/2020 18:12

As they left at lunchtime they have time to get a late lunch. Four hours work? That is two cups and biscuits in this house.

minnieok · 18/08/2020 18:14

You generally provide access to a kettle, tea, instant coffee, sugar and milk. Anything extra is a bonus eg I would offer a cake if I had been baking but no more

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