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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Advice desperately needed!

10 replies

Smithlets80 · 17/08/2020 15:33

Hi, I could really do with some advice. DS (who is 17) has just has just returned from Spain with his DF (my EX'D'H) and is refusing to quarantine. His DF is an absolute cunt who seems to get away with everything (paying people to go to jail for him, owing over 8K in court ordered maintenance payments, having a girlfriend in the North and a partner with a baby in the South, you get the picture! He was emotionally abusive when we were married and we split when DS when 1. They are both really sneaky (told me he was only going to Cornwall but took his passport with him) and DS has a hell of a temper when things don't go his own way.

They got back from Spain on Friday and had a night out in EXDH's hometown and then DS was dropped back here on Saturday lunchtime. He then promptly advised that he was going out for dinner with friends. I knew on of his friend's parents so I called her as it was her son picking my DS up - he ended up not going but another boy (whose parents were apparently 'cool with it' still went.

He has now just informed me that he is going out for a driving lesson in 10 mins and I just don't have any control over this and there is no way I can make him stay in the house.

I'm nearly seven moths pregnant so he is isolating in the house but I really don't know what to do - I'm at my wits end and really struggling.

He is always really awful when he comes back from time with his Dad and has a horrible attitude. He has also come back from this holiday with tattoo which I think his Dad has let him get just to annoy me (even though I'm not bothered about them!).

I really ned some advice!

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 17/08/2020 15:35

Tell your son he needs to stay with his father.

Pipandmum · 17/08/2020 15:36

If they came back on Friday they don't need to quarantine.

TheMumblesofMumbledom · 17/08/2020 15:43

@Pipandmum

If they came back on Friday they don't need to quarantine.
Yes he does, Spanish quarantine started at the end of July.
Phbq · 17/08/2020 15:47

Pipandmum
If they came back on Friday they don't need to quarantine.

I think they do.
Are you getting confused with France?

Phbq · 17/08/2020 15:47

Sorry x post

VeniceQueen2004 · 17/08/2020 15:49

Unfortunately OP sounds like he's grown into a little shit like his father. Tell him he can do as you say or bugger off and live with his dad. And mean it. He's old enough to know better.

TheQueef · 17/08/2020 15:53

Why cant /won't he stay at dads?

Warpdrive · 17/08/2020 15:53

When he's staying at your house, he abides by your rules. If he refuses, then you practise tough love and refuse to have him live there.

Whatevesok · 17/08/2020 15:57

I'm sorry your son has taken after his father sounds awful. He needs to stay with his dad.

Trashtara · 17/08/2020 16:05

Can you call his driving instructor and tell him?

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