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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu...how close to normal is life for you

288 replies

jeansandashirt · 16/08/2020 16:49

Aibu to wonder how close to "normal" (as we know it) is your life right now?

OP posts:
SophieB100 · 17/08/2020 06:35

About 70% I'd say.
Seeing family and friends but with SD obviously.
Shopping - haven't been into town to trawl round the retail shops yet, or been in a pub/cafe - but didn't do that too often anyway.
Supermarket - can walk to local Lidl and Tesco - the mask thing is fine - used to that.
Work - worked throughout in a school (with key worker kids then year 10s) and that's weird.
New term will be interesting.
It's ok - better than March/April/May!

ginsparkles · 17/08/2020 07:15

Somethings feel fairly normal but with an abnormal shadow over them. DH and I are both back out at work, but wearing masks/visors all day, being behind screens and constant hand washing makes it feel not normal.
Dd can only go to my mums while we work. She would normally go to other relatives houses too.
We are seeing a few friends but only outside, normally we would meet as a large group but that's not happening.
We haven't seen anyone in our home yet, everything is happening in gardens or taking walks together.
We have only eaten out at our local pub, because we don't feel comfortable at other places yet.
Not sure when it will feel normal, or whether this will just feel more normal the longer it goes on. I can see us still being like this come Christmas.

Noextremes2017 · 17/08/2020 07:21

@Ubermints

100% agree. If the Government says the best way to avoid the virus is to hop around town naked we’ll see an unexpectedly high number of people doing it.

Friendsoftheearth · 17/08/2020 07:22

60% max

Until the children go back to school nothing will feel normal.

There is a lack of a routine and substance my children's lives. Like living out an eternal summer holiday.
Shopping is not fun in a mask
Seeing friends but being careful has taken the joy out of it for me
No holidays overseas this year has been different to a normal summer
wfh still feels strange
We are still meeting only outside only, none of us are comfortable doing indoor meet ups.

Eating out has been lovely and feels normal
Going for days out has been normal and fun
Holiday cottage in the UK was really great, and we enjoyed the beach etc

Basically anything outside feels normal, anything inside feels a long way off.

Now worrying about how on earth christmas will work!!!

Noextremes2017 · 17/08/2020 07:29

@latticechaos

Sorry but your R number comment is ridiculous.

The R number is a made up statistic based on nothing at all. The Government uses it as a tool to either frighten people into being more cautious or to encourage them to be more adventurous. They change the number according to their own state of panic!

For example R number 0.6 to 0.8 and falling means please get back to work, go out and shop and save the economy that we have destroyed. R number 0.7 to 0.9 - be careful people you are not social distancing enough and we are worried!

R is meaningless unless there are a lot of cases (there are not) and a HUGE sample taken (there never has been).

It is just a way to manipulate human behaviour!!!!

rookiemere · 17/08/2020 07:37

Personally about 70% normal. WFH feels ok now I'm so used to it and it's wonderful being able to see friends and go out for dinner with the bizarre Rishi deal. I miss cinema, theatre and the gym, but not desperately.
I am hanging my hat on schools staying open, or if not providing an acceptable level of online education or if not I will pay for tutors. last term was a huge strain trying to ensure DS 14 was doing some work.

Also not being able to book holidays feels hugely depressing. I know it's a first world problem, but I really looked forward to going away on a regular basis. We just had a lovely weekend away locally so that helped a bit.

KitKatastrophe · 17/08/2020 07:38

About 75%
I have a3 year old and we would normally spend a good chunk of the week away toddler groups, stay and play and various classes. None of these areas open yet. She had also just started preschool, which will be reopening in September.

Friendsoftheearth · 17/08/2020 07:42

no but you do accept that people need guidance so an R rate is just as good as anything else. I don't think anyone would feel safe if they have no measures at all, no guidance and were left to second guess the infection rates in their areas.

Healthy and young people may feel it is irrelevant but for those at risk I am pretty sure they would be more frightened with an absence of information/measure.

The R rate is useful in the sense that it is simple to understand. The grid reference of how it multiplies after 1 was very interesting and simple to follow. I agree with using it as a way to help people understand what their risks might be at any one time, and slowing or increasing movement and contact.

Positivevibesonlyplease · 17/08/2020 07:45

Getting back to normal. We’ve just started eating out again, which was a big hurdle for me. I haven’t been on public transport yet, but I’m planning to catch a train next week. Still won’t go in people’s houses, as I’m terrified I’ll pass it on to loved ones. Only see my DM and DF outside in the garden. I’m continuing to do their shopping. Getting used to mask wearing and queueing. Still hate people coming too close.

JacobReesMogadishu · 17/08/2020 07:47

Not very.

I’m still working from home until next year. Dh is wfh. Dd had a breakdown and dropped out of uni.

My brother invited me to go and see him next week. I nearly said no because I’m not sure it’s allowed but have said yes. It’ll be the first time I’ve seen him in ages.

Mintjulia · 17/08/2020 07:54

In terms of social life, almost normal. I’m a Lp with no backup nearby so I stay in mostly. See a couple of friends for coffee, the only thing I’ve not done since Lockdown is go out for a meal.

But I’ve been made redundant, so not normal on that front. Thankfully there are still some jobs in my sector so I’m busy applying. On the up-side, I’m having my first real break in a decade, reading books, leisurely cooking, having a lie in. Job search in earnest starts Sept 1st. Smile

year5teacher · 17/08/2020 07:54

Fairly close. I’m socialising but at a distance. Went on U.K. holiday a few weeks ago and went to restaurants etc. Will be back at work full time in a few weeks. The difference is with my family - I’m being incredibly careful when seeing my parents so the amount of time I spend with them and how we spend it is very different now.

myusernamewastakenbyme · 17/08/2020 07:57

90% for me too...im still on furlough but as soon as things reopened i was using them....life is too short...looking at my family history i could be dead in a few years....i love eating out and visiting places and will continue to do so.

LaChatte · 17/08/2020 08:02

99%. Turns out I'm a hermit.

AlwaysLatte · 17/08/2020 08:05

No change now that it is the summer holidays. Husband retired and I'm a SAHM, not doing home schooling with the kids now that it is the summer. Except we didn't go to Italy during the summer like we had originally planned, it's no different.

Sailingblue · 17/08/2020 08:44

50% for me. Over August we’ve had childcare for one child but we’re still trying to juggle work and childcare with the other. Come September we should hopefully have both children in school or childcare while working. The oldest one should have activities returning in September but they won’t be quite the same as normal. My husband and I are likely to be wfh until January. The big difference is the fact everything is a faff with the children and it’s hard to just pop somewhere.

SuperCaliFragalistic · 17/08/2020 08:52

About 90%. Weve been on camping holidays which is totally normal for us. Kids have visited grandparents over the summer holidays. Work is close to normal. Occasionally we come across people who are still being very cautious and it reminds me of how terrified lots of healthy middle aged adults still are, which surprises me.

Sidalee7 · 17/08/2020 09:48

Feels like it is slowly getting back to normal, and once schools go back will feel more so.
Have had a UK holiday - no desire to go abroad but have rebooked our cancelled holiday for next year. Avoiding shops and wearing a mask and wfh full time so that is still so different to life pre March.

FilthyforFirth · 17/08/2020 09:58

Not very to be honest. My trust seems like the strictest one going, DH still cant come to any scans/appts so doing all that on my own. 26 weeks and have done them all on my own so far.

Hate wearing a mask and asthmatic, so basically not going out to shops very much to avoid wearing one.

Only been inside my parents house and only had them inside mine. Did meet my best friend for lunch the other day which was nice.

I am not precious at all about the virus but am trying to avoid crowded places etc. Feel sorry for DS who is back at nursery but not had a holiday nor will be now as I will be too far gone to travel soon.

Like so many have missed countless familt milestones. Feeling pretty miserable and worried about how shit Christmas might be.

DDIJ · 17/08/2020 10:44

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AHippoNamedBooBooButt · 17/08/2020 10:52

Pretty normal. I work in a school so currently on summer holidays so at home with the dc, counting down the days till gcse results on Thursday. But dh was due to go back to work today after being furloughed and he's been forced (or very strongly advised) to take 2 weeks of his holiday as there is no work (0hrs contract but pre-covid worked 30hrs+ each week for the last 5 years) so that's a bit of a concern, if there's still nothing in a month we will have to apply for UC.

Whatevesok · 17/08/2020 12:30

@DDIJ

My life has remained exactly as normal throughout.
I'd be interested if you could share what sort of things you do or what typical day is like please? Or anyone who has not changed what they do much.

I feel it is very dependent on jobs and lifestyle!

gwenneh · 17/08/2020 12:59

Not at all normal. DH is WFH for the foreseeable, still partially furloughed with a corresponding reduction in income. The DC are all at home with him, driving him insane when he's trying to work. There is no expectation that he'll be going in again, basically ever.

I'm going in to work each day but half of my staff is still furloughed and many of the ones who are not are WFH. We are all filed in our individual offices with no common areas shared; the kitchen, conference rooms, lobby, etc. are all closed. All of the staff miss the camaraderie we had -- we were a very social company.

Where normally the DC would have a full range of activities and summer camps, closures and cancellations and the need to work means they've done nothing but play video games all summer so far, apart from the baby who is of course too small. We are still in survival mode. They DC have had limited playdates, outdoors, in the past few weeks. They will not be going back to school in the autumn; we have a fully remote option available and we are going to take it, with a teacher who we have hired with one other family to help lead it.

We do have a small, domestic holiday planned in October, not our usual holiday abroad (which this year was meant to coincide with a friend's wedding, that was cancelled.)

We are continuing to limit risk so the DC can continue to spend time with my parents -- it's really not so much about our risk but theirs, and my decisions take into account how many people we potentially expose my parents (and by extension, grandparents) to.

DDIJ · 17/08/2020 13:03

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StrangerSwings · 17/08/2020 13:27

I'm still on furlough, I work in one of the industries that was told to close before the national lockdown. It is also one of the last to go back. Due to the current guidelines we will be operating at heavily reduced capacity. Looking to return next month on part furlough. Once furlough ends no one will be made redundant but I'm looking at having my hours slashed from 36 to 8. Not normal, the anxiety this has caused is a living nightmare.

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