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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

self checkout stealing

246 replies

starshipsweremeanttofly · 15/08/2020 19:55

Yes IABU.
I started this around 2 weeks ago, a shop I visit several times per week. The first time, I can't remember if it was an accident or a conscious choice. I put through most of the items and threw one in my bag unscanned. This shop doesn't weigh the items on self scanner and doesn't have security bleep things on the exit. I have been maybe once since where I paid for everything.
Has anyone else done this sort of thing? It's partly a rush I guess, sounds cringey to say it. Partly driven by money worries. I'm not in a great place mentally.
It's a big chain, not excusing it, just I'm sure someone will say I'm stealing from a small independent shop.
I'm just trying to understand myself and try to bloody stop.

OP posts:
Witchend · 15/08/2020 20:25

I suspect more people at some point have had the position where they've got home and found there was something where they didn't pay for it.
In my case I'd picked up two cards that were stuck back to back.
That happens.

But then you have a choice. In my case, I took the extra card back, handed it in and explained what had happened. End of story.
Now I wouldn't necessarily have blamed you the first time if you'd just thought "oh well" and kept it. A fair number of people wouldn't have even noticed, and it was an accident.
But to continue doing it is really wrong.

As others have said, don't use the self scanner. Perhaps limit yourself to going in the shop less often. And also realise (we have police radio at work) that they may be perfectly aware you are doing it, and are waiting for the right moment to pounce.
We get "call 99" calls where we can hear the security alerting the police, and making a decision whether they will catch the person this time or next. You will be on CCTV, and they may well be saving evidence.
Once you've been caught you may find that you are banned from the shop. Also, as again I know from police radio, when you're in town, other local shops may be put on alert that a known shoplifter has just entered, and they may decide to escort you out. Sainsbury's certainly has a few people who are asked to leave upon entry due to dodgy dealings on self-checkouts. One of them gets very mouthy, so they often ask for support.

I do think getting people to listen to how much known shoplifters are watched by the police/shop security and CCTV would put a number off.
There are times when it really is a case of:
"Calling 99: Boots calling Known shoplifter, escorting out. Can you check CCTV. About 5'6, black hair, blue coat and a buggy. They're heading towards Primark."
"Primark here, can see them."
"Leaving Primark going west towards Sports Direct"
"Sports Direct here, getting security on door..."
"99 here, clear evidence of them taking items at Boots and Primark, sending officers down."
10 minutes later. "Calling Boots, Primark. Person remanded. Can you come and identify your property?"

No it isn't always as simple as that, but it does happen.

recklessruby · 15/08/2020 20:26

Doesn't your self service till record every transaction on screen? Ours has a little thing saying recording and theres a lovely picture of me sweating in my mask scanning stuff.
Please stop. I used to work in retail and we knew who our theives were. One day they ll stop you and have plenty of evidence.
For a few cheap things you will mess your life up and if you're not in a good place mentally now getting arrested and going to court really wont help that.

LonginesPrime · 15/08/2020 20:27

Has anyone else done this sort of thing?

Of course they have - if other people hadn't stolen on the past, the crime of theft wouldn't have been written into law, would it?

Starbuggy · 15/08/2020 20:28

Of course YABU

Stealing is never ok.

If your MH is suffering I’m not sure this thread will be helpful

supersop60 · 15/08/2020 20:28

Think it through, OP.
You haven't been caught, yet.
What happens when you do? A fine? a criminal record? how is that going to help your state of mind or your future prospects.
If you are aware enough to post on here, you are aware enough to stop it.
YABVVU.

WhatifIfeellikeacat · 15/08/2020 20:30

I remember a celebrity was caught stealing cheese at the checkout just don't remember who was that. A chef, I think.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 15/08/2020 20:33

I think it was Winona Ryder who was stealing cheese.

EdwardCullensBiteOnTheSide · 15/08/2020 20:34

You are definitely going to get caught.

OnTheWheelOfLife · 15/08/2020 20:34

I think peoples responses are harsh. Of course OP knows it’s wrong, but kleptomania is a mental health issue and is usually down to other things, it’s not always because the person is a selfish sickness who wants free stuff.

OP get a GP appointment tomorrow and go and talk to someone. It’s confidential, non-judgemental (well should be) and they will be able to help. You need to avoid that store and shop elsewhere if you, if you can’t you need to force yourself not to go near the self-checkouts. Get on top of this now before it gets worse.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 15/08/2020 20:34

Maybe not cheese, but she was definitely caught shoplifting something stupid.

kazzer2867 · 15/08/2020 20:36

Really. Nothing on the TV tonight.

Hmm
WhatifIfeellikeacat · 15/08/2020 20:36

I think it was Winona Ryder who was stealing cheese.

No, her stealing was ancient.

It was www.channel4.com/news/tv-chef-worrall-thompson-steals-cheese-and-wine

MaggieAndHopey · 15/08/2020 20:37

It wasn't Winona Ryder it was Anthony Worral Thompson. Ended his TV career (fortunately)

Owleyes16 · 15/08/2020 20:40

Of course you know it's wrong, but kleptomania is real and you need help for it. In the meantime, do what you can to avoid those situations, get someone else to go with you if you need to, go to the normal checkouts, order online, etc. The security guards and police won't care about your mental health problems, but you can get help for it now.

Butchyrestingface · 15/08/2020 20:40

I think it was Winona Ryder who was stealing cheese.

No, her stealing was ancient.

And it was overpriced t-shirts that were her Achilles heel.

PhilSwagielka · 15/08/2020 20:41

To avoid doing this, use the till.

FelicityPike · 15/08/2020 20:42

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult

I think it was Winona Ryder who was stealing cheese.
Lingerie.
PhilSwagielka · 15/08/2020 20:43

Why do you steal, just out of interest? Is it an anti-capitalist thing? Do you get a buzz off it? Are you too skint to pay?

DimidDavilby · 15/08/2020 20:44

I love shoplifting, especially from big shops. Enjoy the rush, its free!

Crankley · 15/08/2020 20:44

You will no doubt stop when you get caught and banned from the supermarkets. Let's hope it's soon.

oakleaffy · 15/08/2020 20:45

NO excuse to steal.
I once tried to steal a drink {a smoothie} and drank it in the shop, and paid for everything else.

A plain clothes man {I won't name the shop!} said ''Are you going to pay for the smoothie you drank?''....He had retrieved it from the bin by the self service till.

I was mortified, said ''I'm really sorry, no excuse for what I did''...and paid.
I was lucky he didn't call the police.

Don't do it, OP.

I'd never do it now...Being in a ''bad place'' is no excuse either. Nor is being poor.
{I was skint at the time...but still no excuse.}

Witchend · 15/08/2020 20:45

I think peoples responses are harsh. Of course OP knows it’s wrong, but kleptomania is a mental health issue and is usually down to other things, it’s not always because the person is a selfish sickness who wants free stuff.

I'm not sure you can diagnose kleptomania when the OP says she only started 2 weeks ago.

PhilSwagielka · 15/08/2020 20:45

@DimidDavilby

I love shoplifting, especially from big shops. Enjoy the rush, its free!
Are you doing it as some kind of protest/activist thing or do you just like stealing?
Butchyrestingface · 15/08/2020 20:46

I love shoplifting, especially from big shops. Enjoy the rush, its free!

Not sure this is quite the pep talk OP had in mind.

TreaterAnita · 15/08/2020 20:46

@OnTheWheelOfLife

I think peoples responses are harsh. Of course OP knows it’s wrong, but kleptomania is a mental health issue and is usually down to other things, it’s not always because the person is a selfish sickness who wants free stuff.

OP get a GP appointment tomorrow and go and talk to someone. It’s confidential, non-judgemental (well should be) and they will be able to help. You need to avoid that store and shop elsewhere if you, if you can’t you need to force yourself not to go near the self-checkouts. Get on top of this now before it gets worse.

Completely agree. OP you must get help because you will be caught and it will be, as an absolute minimum, utterly humiliating - and that’s if they let you off. In the meantime steer clear of that shop or, if that’s unavoidable, pay at a manned till. You do no want a criminal record because of this. If you have money problems to the extent that you are struggling to feed yourself/your family, then you can also ask to be referred to a food bank.
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