AIBU?

[sickandtired1244]

I seem to do everything wrong according to my Husband. Am I really very annoying or is this just life:

I fill the kettle the wrong way
I point the kettle the wrong way
I burn the pans
I don't soak my cereal bowl
I leave a cushion by mistake in the rain
I move his charger
I run the tap too long when cleaning my teeth
Etc etc

Yeah that does sound a bit annoying sorry

Presumably though he is perfect in every way?

Kettle and cereal bowl - he is being annoying and petty
Pans and cushion - everyone makes mistakes, unless you burn them very often!
Moving his charger - annoying, get your own
Teeth - it's easy to get in the habit of turning the tap off and it saves a lot of water

Is he constantly chipping at you OP? It grinds you down eventually.

@gamerchick

Is he constantly chipping at you OP? It grinds you down eventually.

Yep - all the time!

Mine used to do that... I just ignored him. He gave up eventually. 😀

Say nothing, and totally ignore. Do not engage.

If he's still doing it 6 months later, LTB.

Sorry but he sounds like many a Mumsnetter, moaning about their husband 🤣

How many pans are you burning?

Jesus... is he ever nice? Complimentary? Loving?

Or is it all just nag,nag,nag and how you suck at being a grownup?

Me and OH used to argue about how to do the dishes. His way bugs me but I never commented, unless he was being really stubborn and a prat about me doing it my way.
TBH I solved that one by refusing to do them at all. I am that petty. He also hasn't moaned in years.

That's more than annoying, he's a twat.

How are you filling the kettle?

That’s no way to live. Life is too short to be under the microscope 24/7.
Are you planning to discuss this with him?

Running the tap too long is annoying. You only need to wet the brush and saves a lot of water. Apart from that he’s quite petty

I used to say to my husband all the time ‘just because we do things differently, doesn’t mean you are right and I am wrong we just do it differently!’ He soon stopped!

He sounds like he whinges a lot but I guess it depends on how often you dont soak your cereal bowl , burn pans , leave cushions in the rain and move his charger .
Me and my DH use to annoy each other by putting the kettle the wrong way round because he was left handed and I am right handed but we never complained to each other .
I am not sure how you can fill a kettle wrong , unless you fill it more than you need ( full kettle for one brew ) as that is wasteful.
It only takes a few seconds to rinse a cereal bowl and dried on cereal can be a bugger to get off .
Get your own charger ( with a extra long cable )
And turn the tap of while brushing your teeth, or you are wasting water , that would annoy me too .

I am not saying he has a right to whinge but they are easily rectifiable issues and some of them would annoy me.
Does he do anything that annoys you ( apart from complaining a lot ) ?
Every time he has a go at you , you tell him something that he does that annoys you , but dont let it become a bitching battle ground .

It is hard to know without knowing more details.
How old are you both and how long have you lived together?

But either he is a nag that doesn't like you very much or you're very hard to live with.

How often do you burn the pans?
How do you fill a kettle wrong?

To be honest, most of those would be really annoying.

Most adults have enough common sense to not leave cushions in the rain, to make sure the soak the cereal bowl so the cereal doesn't cement itself on so its hard to clean. to not burn a pan, to not waste water, to not move stuff that isn't theirs (not sure about the kettle ones, they don't make sense to me).

Obviously everyone makes a one-off mistake, and that can't be helped. But if you are repeatedly not taking care of things (wet cushion/burnt damaged pan) or leaving problems for others to sort (moved (lost?) cable/filthy cereal bowls) or being wasteful (water when brushing teeth), then that's really inconsiderate, and incredibly difficult and draining to live with.

If my husband was repeatedly doing stuff on that list, then yes, I'd be having words. He's an adult and should behave like one. But one off mistakes happen from time to time, and that's OK. (But I would expect the person causing the problem to fix the problem- e.g. dry out or buy new cushions/find cable/clean burnt pan or buy new/ wash filthy cereal bowl etc. Nothing more selfish than expecting someone else to suffer as a consequence of you not doing something properly).

It certainly isn't healthy to feel like you are on trial every day inside your own home. Nonstop criticism is abusive IMO.