to be concerned about how return to work post grievance is being managed?

[mummyinbonniescotland]

Will try to keep this short.

pre lockdown I had a grievance against my manager and her manager for bullying and disability discrimination. My grievance was partially upheld. I appealed. Nothing was changed ie the outcome was the same. They have agreed to give me a new manager although I am still in the same team so still seeing all these managers (cannot transfer). They will also organise disability awareness training and provide the adjustments I've repeatedly asked for. Its good but not enough.

I've been told that my old manager will manage the team but the new manager will oversee my performance reviews....how does that mean a new manager? Is the new manager in name only? and the other bully is still there too as their manager.

The bully managers were not fired despite affecting me so badly I attempted suicide and was off long term sick throughout 2019. I had a tonne of written evidence and witness statements. One other person (one of my witnesses) was forced out. I was due to return to work from sick leave in March but lockdown hit which was a kind of blessing to me as I was put on furlough and delayed my return.

I did consider asking for a exit package but my union said there was no chance of one being offered, the money would be too low, and could run out before I found something else. Union has also said that this is not a good climate to leave anyway especially if you have disabilities that sadly make you a less appealing job applicant.

Now HR want me back at work soon but on a WFH basis for the foreseeable. Again probably the best way to avoid seeing those individuals They are pushing me to 'move on' and 'everything is in the past' and 'people shouldn't walk on eggshells around you'. I've been told that the team will all have a set of rules to follow and individually sign, including me, and this is for 'mutual respect and understanding'. I am also being pushed to enter mediation with the bullies.

AIBU to think I am the victim here but I am being made to feel like I am partly to blame? I never once got any apology from anyone, not my managers nor HR for their poor handling of it initially until my union stepped in to get it addressed properly. I'm sure if I got an apology it wouldn't be sincere anyway but I'd be expected to accept it.

I am very nervous about excuses being made / blame being passed onto me / acting like everything is fine and nothing happened.

My union rep retired in lockdown and the other union rep is representing my managers but can't tell me why (maybe disciplinary although they haven't been fired). Branch secretary and regional officer are obviously very busy with Covid so no one really getting back to me with advice.

I am actively looking for other jobs but as I said above, I'm not in a position to just quit my job. Furthermore, despite it being a shit place to work, it's very well paid and also very niche, so opportunities elsewhere are few (I have been doing a few online courses though and also volunteering to build my CV).

Can anyone give some tips on how to deal with my return, and difficult conversations, both virtually and in person. I just feel so down, so worried and so confused. I know I'm lucky to still have a job though.

Am I the one who is being difficult here? Or are my employers being unreasonable in their expectations of me?

oops, that wasn't short at all

WFH should help to calm the situation. Use the fact that you have a new line manager to set boundaries with the others and try to make a good relationship with them.
Mediation could go any way. It is likely voluntary but will stand you in good stead to at least engage in it to begin with. Additionally it is likely that they are feeling as apprehensive about this as you are. I would find out what it entails though so you are prepared. Some mediation will start off separately and then move to joint mediation but ask what the objectives are... does it involve statements, who is to start each session etc. This might make you feel more comfortable about it.
And of course as you probably already do, record record record.
Good luck OP I’m sure you will make it through and in the mean time keep looking

I'd also suggest posting in Legal Eagles or Employment Matters as there are 'netters who are employment lawyers, HR ppls and Union Reps who can give more pertinent advice.

In the meantime, I'm sorry that the company is trying the "two sides to every story" approach and minimising your experience.

I agree with the last post.
Sometimes the things we dread turn out better than we hope. Personally I'd want a meeting with my new manager asap, so that it is clear what your old managers involvement with you will be. At a minimum they should copy you and your new line manager with all the work, targets etc they issue you with.

I'm not sure what my ideal outcome would be. I am getting what I asked for on paper- new manager, adjustments, awareness training.

But it does feel as though they aren't 'getting it' and that there seems to be blame appointed on me too. I didn't break the law, my managers did, although to go into details would be v outing. Basically there is more to it than discrimination and bullying.

I am definitely worried that my old manager will still be my manager in a roundabout way and I'm also worried this will happen again. I'm worried about my mental health. I need clarification on several matters but it seems HR just want to brush it away and close the case.

I can understand how you feel but, given what changes have been made (on paper at least) you may need to give it a go. Be professional, keep notes see what happens. That way you have a better chance of raising the matter again if your suspicions become reality. Easier said than done I know

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I know you can't go into any more detail as it's outing, however there are always two sides to every story, or at least, the whole thing sounds very complicated and messy, and I am certain there will be plenty of grey and muddy areas.
The simple truth is, when there is a grievance procedure, whatever the truth and whatever the outcome, there will be bad feeling on both sides. There is no way anyone can come out of this unscathed.
You have the opportunity to work from home at the moment, and hopefully limited contact with the bullies.
I would keep yourself busy with work, keep a record of every interaction with these people, but quietly keep on the look out for another job, or a position in a different department in the firm.