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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To fight MH teams decision

29 replies

Maidmummy · 13/08/2020 11:32

DD will be six at the beginning of September and she has little to no hair, since being born it's grown roughly an inch, anyway I've noticed over the last 6 months she's started pulling it out at the back and sometimes eating it and 90% of the time she doesn't realise she's doing it and I have to tell her about it. I contacted the GP who referred her to the child mental health team who basically sent me a letter saying "we don't need to see her as it's not mental health related, we suggest you speak to her school nurse". How am I supposed to do that when we've had lockdown so no school and they have now broken up for 6 weeks, what would a school nurse even be able to do 🤷 everywhere I have read suggests possible anxiety and isn't that MH related.

Is it worth taking her back to the GP and demand it be dealt with by the correct professionals?

The picture was taken about a year ago but her hairs still exactly the same

To fight MH teams decision
OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 13/08/2020 11:38

Her hair not frowning isn't a mental health issue.

I'd also say that unless she's been serverly neglected or traumatised, hair pulling is more likely an unpleasant habit rather than a mental health issue - much like nail biting or similar.

Your school nurse should still be avaliable outside of school time, email the head teacher for a referal.

I would be looking at ways to break a bad habit at home. Regards to her hair being slow growing, not sure there's much you can do if your gp has ruled out medical reasons.

Patchworkcats · 13/08/2020 11:38

Hi not sure if you've heard of Trichotillomania. It's a hair pulling disorder closely related to OCD. Might be worth looking into ans going back to the GP armed with that information x

Huhokthen · 13/08/2020 12:13

Is she anxious? Stressed? Upset? If so then maybe she does need mental health help.

But if she's not aware she's doing it then it's likely just a bad habit - deal with it like you'd deal with nose picking or fingernail biting and stop her every time she does it. Or get her to wear a hat.

Growth-wise, lots of children don't have much hair for years, IME especially fair girls. That's certainly been the case in my family.

spanieleyes · 13/08/2020 12:16

In my county we have a service called Healthy Minds, for situations that don't fit CAHMS but might be anxiety- related. You might want to see if There is something similar in your area. You can self refer or ask the school SENCO to refer for you.

Stompythedinosaur · 13/08/2020 12:29

I'm a CAMHS nurse. I'm afraid to say that I dont think you have any chance of being picked up unless the hair pulling is accompanied by high levels of distress or other symptoms. Not that CAMHS workers don't want to help, but commissioners have ruled that they will only pay for the few most acutely unwell children to be seen.

I would suggest that you can probably provide help yourself, and that discussing the situation with a school nurse in a few weeks when school is back is a good idea. Unless your dc is distressed in other ways, I would suggest dealing with it like nail biting (basically be super observant and prompt her when she is doing it so she gains a better level of awareness, praise her for trying not to pull her hair).

Obviously if it is linked to suspected ASD, anxiety or a trauma history then that doesn't apply and the underlying symptoms need looking at.

NerrSnerr · 13/08/2020 12:34

I agree with the letter I'm afraid. You can access the school nursing service via the GP- you don't need to go via the school. In our area you can self refer too, I just googled 'county I live in school nursing service and a self referral form was on their page.

Original poster
Maidmummy · 17/08/2020 06:20

Thank you for the suggestions everybody but ITS GONE 😭 her hair has GONE, she went to stay with my mum from Thursday last week to Saturday and when she got back it's pretty obvious she's lost her hair, she has 2 big orange sized bald patches one on the top of her head and one at the back it looks like somebody took a shaver to it and gave her a grade 0, my mum is aware she pulls her hair out so she always keeps a close eye on her and she said she never pulled at it once while she was there, she went to bed got up and there the bald patches were, WTF is going on with her 😭 all she essentially has left is a couple of curls on either side of her head now x

OP posts:
Sciurus83 · 17/08/2020 06:34

I'm sorry this sounds very stressful. Some great suggestions from others but I would go back to the GP as well Flowers

TheSandgroper · 17/08/2020 06:38

You need a good allergy/intolerance unit, I think. Something is going on that’s not right. A good dietitian experienced in intolerances is good, too.

GP’s know very little about the subject so research and don’t be fobbed off. There’s a Facebook group called UK Food Intolerance Group you can join. They can probably help with recommendations.

Sirzy · 17/08/2020 06:38

I assume there have been investigations as to why her hair isn’t growing at all? School nurses don’t work term time only. Your GP practise will have the contact details for the nurse linked to your school.

As horrible as it is I don’t think hair pulling alone would be a reason to access CAMHs. DS is under CAMHs and does have a history of hair pulling but that’s just a part of a much bigger issue.

VeggieSausageRoll · 17/08/2020 06:45

Does she have other medical issues? Just asking because the photo looks like she has an IV in her left hand?

I know they're akin to the devil on MN, but I wonder if she is young enough to still be under the remit of the local health visiting team?

Sarahandco · 17/08/2020 07:12

Is there any chance she has come into contact with ringworm? when we were kids (very long time ago) my friend and I were on holiday in Spain and there were some stray looking cats hanging around and my friend played with them and fed them every day. To cut a long story short, a while after we came home she started losing hair and eventually developed roundish patches of no hair at all. It turned out to be ringworm, tinea cap. It is not actually worms, but an infection /fungus that can be caught from animals. If it is a possibility, it could be worth looking into - the hair pulling could be itchiness?

Oblomov20 · 17/08/2020 07:15

I too think the GP will know very little and so don't be GP fobbed off by the GP.
Have you had tests? Been referred?
Do you have any idea what is causing it? I mean yourself. Most mums do know.
Has the hair been tested? Intolerances and diet and iron and b12 etc etc.

And the pulling? Habit? Have you tacked it directly? What does she say? Is it the feel of the hair? Comforting like hair twiddling? Or stress, that makes her yank it? Do the local support groups still recommend wearing a beanie hat and gloves to stop the touching? Or maybe that's old school and considered too harsh these days.

I have very thin fine hair. Plus I'm also a hair twiddler. I only just found out this month that I had barely any hair, at 1, and was diagnosed diabetic, at 1.5, and a lack of hair is a classic sign in babies, of diabetes. But I hadn't known that before.

PathOfLeastResitance · 17/08/2020 07:38

Unfortunately being seen by CAMHs is highly unlikely. They see the very extreme cases - and even getting those children seen is nigh on impossible.
Some areas have a ‘lighter touch’ version of CAMHs that schools can access via a phone line - when schools return you could email the SENCo and ask them if that exists where you are. Saying that, your GP will also have this information.
In my area (And the 3 neighbouring areas) School Nurses only work in term time. They are a useful source of support and information and (in my area) parents can self refer and so can GPs and SENCos.
I am a SENCo and getting support for many things is extremely hard so good luck.

angelfishrock · 17/08/2020 07:46

Trichotillomania was my first thought too.

even if you get a referral to camhs, you would be looking at 18-24 months wait at the least esp if she does not have other issues but I do understand why you are concerned.

Any chance you could go private to get some pointers and how to deal with it?

Trichotillomania is not very common. not surprised the GP didn't understand it and I highly doubt this is school nurse territory.

FippertyGibbett · 17/08/2020 07:55

School nurse do not shut when schools are shut, they work all year round like the HV’s.

Oblomov20 · 17/08/2020 07:58

I Agree Angel. You are absolutely wasting your time, thinking you are going to get anywhere with the school nurse. Nice as they are they are generalists. And aren't working now.

Or most GP's. They simply won't know anything. We seriously can't expect them to know much about something this rare.

Honestly believe the only way you'll get anyway here is to go privately. (1)

But ask GP for a NHS referral now just to get the ball rolling. (2)

Re private: find a specialist in London you know all about it, hair.

Maybe secondly pay for tests to be done we why the hair isn't growing, lack of iron , blood tests, et cetera et cetera locally ?

attack it in 3 different ways.

And You're going to have to be proactive : ring case email, ring case email,all the time.

FippertyGibbett · 17/08/2020 08:04

@Oblomov20

I Agree Angel. You are absolutely wasting your time, thinking you are going to get anywhere with the school nurse. Nice as they are they are generalists. And aren't working now.

Or most GP's. They simply won't know anything. We seriously can't expect them to know much about something this rare.

Honestly believe the only way you'll get anyway here is to go privately. (1)

But ask GP for a NHS referral now just to get the ball rolling. (2)

Re private: find a specialist in London you know all about it, hair.

Maybe secondly pay for tests to be done we why the hair isn't growing, lack of iron , blood tests, et cetera et cetera locally ?

attack it in 3 different ways.

And You're going to have to be proactive : ring case email, ring case email,all the time.

School nurses are working now, they work all year round.
Floatyboat · 17/08/2020 08:04

@VeggieSausageRoll

Yes I wonder if there is other information it would be helpful to know.

angelfishrock · 17/08/2020 08:10

School nurses are working now, they work all year round.

School nurses will have never heard of trichotillomania. school nurses are useful for certain things but not if they are too complex for a GP even.

Flapjak · 17/08/2020 08:11

It sounds like trich, and therr are some good online resources for it for teens / adults. I am not sure a out very young children. Eating it suggests something called pica as well but regardless of whatever label is attached to it, this behaviour is a sign or symptom of something else going on either neurological or psychological so you both need the appropriate referral to support. As per the above poster it needs a multi pronged attack and the way nhs services are running even before covid it is still sometimes a year before anything happens. I would try and get a private assessment if you have access to the funds

Wherestheline · 17/08/2020 08:14

My brothers daughter is 7 and has 2 golf ball sized chunks of hair missing. She’s just been diagnosed with alopecia and they think it relates to gluten intolerance. I’d get her to the gp!

ScrapThatThen · 17/08/2020 08:15

It's unlikely to meet the threshold without seeing school nurse first. School nurses are back in school soon.

Wherestheline · 17/08/2020 08:17

Trichotillomania Wouldn’t cover why the hair isn’t growing in the first place so i don’t think it sounds like a pulling disorder.
I definitely think it’s one for the doctor.

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