Light hearted, but a bit miffed

[Courtney555]

If you called your husband at work, for something pretty trivial, and you said, "and also I'm just calling to say 'love you' "

Would you be surprised that they wouldn't say it back as they were sitting in earshot of another male colleague?

It's bothered me a bit. Just curious how many other people's DHs wouldn't say it over the phone because another man was in the room?

If it makes any difference, it's a member of his team, not an relatively unknown colleague.

He could have said “you too”.

My husband is generally very effusive and emotionally expressive but I don’t think he would say he loved me when he was at work, because it looks a bit unprofessional. I wouldn’t say love you on the phone to him if I was at work either, even though I say it about 12 times a day usually.

I'm just being precious I think.

He actually said "thank you" and I thought, what the hell? Then twigged that someone else was there, which he confirmed about thirty seconds later, saying he was sitting with "John"

Dh would say I love you back.
Fil def wouldn't..
When ils first met mil put sweet notes in fils lunch box.
Fil never forgave her!!
Some people like a private life to be very private!!

He probably felt awkward saying it in front of colleagues or he didn’t want them knowing he was taking personal calls in work time? i understand why you feel hurt though but I’d let it go.

I would say "you too" if I received that call, not getting mushy at work!

You are being ridiculous.

YABU

I wouldn’t say it back, as I find it a bit cringeworthy. Maybe he felt embarrassed.

Sounds fine to me. You should always only express love as and when you feel it. If every 'I love you' is met parrot fashion with 'I love you too' it becomes meaningless.

I personally wouldn't ring my partner at work for a trivial reason in the first place, and then quote a Stevie Wonder song expecting him to enthusiastically profess his love back.

I think you should leave him alone when he's at work.

I wouldn't say 'I love you' back to DP if I was at work and neither would he. But then I wouldn't say it to him if I called him at work anyway as I wouldn't want to put him in that position.
I think it's a bit of a none issue to be honest. I'm sure it doesn't reflect how he actually feels about you!

Of course I wouldn't expect him to say it back while at work! So I would probably text something like that (and saucier!) instead.

I wouldn’t say it back if it was at work either.

If I rang him at work I wouldn't tell him let alone expect him to say it back.

I wouldn't call my dp at work unless it was an emergency and he wouldn't call me either. We sometimes text each other and then we can read the text whenever it's convenient. The recipient will either text back or call when they're on a break, depending what the text was about.

I might say "love you" when saying goodbye (if I'm at home or if I'm in my classroom and no one else is around) and would be happy with "you too" or "me too" as a reply.

He wouldn’t say it back or he didn’t say it back? How did the conversation go.

I wouldn’t have ring dh at work over something trivial, and I would have stuck pins in my eyes before saying I’d just called to say I loved him. Ick.

I would not say I love you either.

Unprofessional and it makes you sound rather needy, OP.

Also, I'd never call someone at work for something trivial. I'd message them and wait for them to reply when they had time or ask them to call me when they had a minute.

Good grief OP 🤦‍♀️ How old are you? Totally ridiculous thing to get worked up about...there are often professional expectations in workplaces (we don't know where your DH works) but it's highly unprofessional for many people to be having personal calls at work in the first place, let alone, as you have said 'trivial' ones that end with the expectation of a reciprocal 'I love you too' in front of colleagues ffs!!

Leave your husband alone whilst he is working, unless it is an absolute emergency!! 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

I honestly needed to hear this. I can get quite sensitive about things like this, and it truly helps to see I'm being unreasonable.

Sometimes I take a call from DH when I'm at work and the office atmosphere is relaxed and happy and I'd say 'love you too' and my colleagues would more than likely shout LOVE YOU TOO in the background.

Sometimes I take a call from DH when things at work are stressful and tense and I would not be chatty/unprofessional in that scenario because its disrespectful to my colleagues.

Sometimes my colleagues are going through relationship issues and I would be sensitive about that too.

Basically you have to read the room don't you.

Ahhh well done OP!! How refreshing to see a poster who asks AIBU and when told a resounding YES, comes back with, yes, you're right, I'm just being a numpty 🤦‍♀️

Have a glass of wine OP and know that he does love you...he'll tell you when he gets home 🥰🥰 🍷

Me and my husband run a company together. Usually when he's with customers and he needs to call me we dont say "I love you" at the end of the call to keep it professional, even if they know us well enough to know we're married.

Once I forgot and did say it but he didn't say it back , the customer heard and made him ring me back to tell me he loved me 🤣

Kudos to you OP for taking the comments on the chin.