Yes I know I am!!

[PerditaMacleod]

I know AIB a bit U, but my in laws are so bloody loud!! We are staying with them, and the racket is constant. DS1 has woken up a couple of times this evening and I'm fairly sure it's the noise. The TV is absolutely blaring, I could hear it clearly over the white noise machine and the floor was actually vibrating at times. DD3 sleeps really close by and I have no idea how she sleeps through it. DM in law has just been in the kitchen putting dishes away, banging and clattering with no effort whatsoever to keep it down, or even close the kitchen door to limit the noise. Every time they go in our out of a room they close the door by slamming it so that it makes a huge bang, not using the handle. I know I am really sensitive to noise, and I need to be more tolerant, but I just find it really inconsiderate and unnecessary! I was brought up to be mindful of people sleeping and to be as quiet as possible at night or in the early morning. Don't feel that I can say anything as it's their house and they're just used to being in their own. I love them to bits but it drives me mad!

YANBU, that sounds horrendous.

Noise is horrendous when noise sensitive and it’s definitely one of those things that not everyone gets.

It’s hard when it’s just the way they live as the chances of them being aware of how it sounds is next to none! Could your partner have a word just to say the kids keep waking with the noise?

Good luck OP!

Yanbu I am noise sensitive and my in laws are so loud and so is DH when they are here. They complain I am too quiet. But it actually makes my head fuzzy with too much noise

It sounds bad but presumably you'll be going home soon so won't have to put up with it for long.

That does sound really tough. My parents are similar, especially since going a bit deaf.

It's ironic really, I move like a ninja because my dad worked nights and we had to be quiet in the day when he was sleeping (I've accidentally scared the crap out of many a housemate who didn't hear me coming).

How long have you got left there?

Have you brought it up with them? Mr Noodle has some minor hearing loss so doesn't realise how loud he's being sometimes when he's in the kitchen slamming cupboard doors to piss me off so maybe they're the same if they're both just used to it?

How long are you staying with them for?

Why are you staying with them if the noise is unbearable?

My PILs are the same. They both stomp around (downstairs neighbours have complained), MIL gets up and starts making breakfast at 5AM which takes at least an hour, both talk really loudly on the phone constantly.

I remember we were sleeping at their house once and I went for a nap and after. my MIL asked me if I had slept well. I honestly thought she was taking the piss. They had yelled and laughed and banged the whole time. My husband, having grown up with it, does not get it at all.

Well you could help them sort out the kitchen ? What are you contributing to this visit ? Sounds to me like you've sloped off to bed and left then to tidy up around you and your children ? Happy to be proved wrong but this might be why they are being noisy ??
And you brought a white noise machine with you ?? Hummm ok. In all honesty sounds like there's more to it than this. Reverse the situation and see if you can see it from their side.

Errm I don't think so lookatme! Definitely nothing malicious in it. Yes I do help around the house with clearing up after everyone. And why would there be more to it because I brought a white noise machine? DS is, like me, a light sleeper and always has white noise in his room so of course I would bring it when we go away.

Annoyingly (and this is v v v U of me!) the noise rarely wakes the DC and I wish it did so that my complaints were justified 😁! As it is, they usually sleep through it and I sit there on edge the whole time expecting that they will wake up any minute.

We are here for about another week. We are staying here as they insist and wouldn't have it any other way, plus they have loads of room. Apart from their noisiness they really are dream in laws so I feel bad moaning about it.

My daughter does that closing the door without using the handle thing. Drives me mad! But at least I can shout at her. Bit more annoying if you're a guest

@birthdaybelle

My daughter does that closing the door without using the handle thing. Drives me mad! But at least I can shout at her. Bit more annoying if you're a guest

So does my daughter and husband. I’m like the handle is there for a reason!!

Well if your DC usually sleep though it then it sounds like you just need to relax. You're winding yourself over what might happen (children waking) despite knowing it rarely does.

I really wish I could relax! But unnecessary noise puts me on edge and makes me very jumpy and anxious. I have to wear earplugs here when I go to bed as they all stay up later than me and then sometimes have a loud and lengthy conversation right outside my door when they go to bed.

You're only there for another week?

Suck it up and book an air B&B next time.

I feel your pain, OP. Mine are the same. After dinner the noise escalates with the TV up (I think there are hearing issues but they insist they don’t need it testing). Then the talk so loudly when going up to bed and brushing teeth. I find it bizarre to talk so loudly at midnight/1pm, especially with little ones in the house.

Then they are up all night for trips to the toilet which isn’t their fault of course but I end up waking up at least 4 times a night.

We do no book air bnbs when we visit but that doesn’t help when they visit us and I don’t want to upset them by bringing it up.