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AIBU?

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Original poster

Laughing at a seizure

100 replies

AtLastEarwax · 09/08/2020 13:39

Not sure if this is in the right section but anyway...

Sister in laws partner told a 'story' the other day about someone he knew had a seizure whilst with him in a shop. He said he couldn't help her and had to run outside because he couldn't stop laughing.

He doesn't know I have epilepsy, well controlled but it's likely I'll have another seizure in my life. Knowing that has made me so anxious though that if it happened to me people would laugh??

AIBU thinking like that??

OP posts:
spiritedawai · 09/08/2020 14:23

Awful. My brother has epilepsy, I've witnessed him have numerous seizures. One resulted in a broken neck. I would be furious if I knew someone had laughed at him. Most people wouldn't find it in the slightest bit amusing OP. It's scary to see but not funny, at all.

attillathenun · 09/08/2020 14:27

That’s awful OP Sad a colleague of mine once had a seizure at work and it was terrifying to see, especially because she was so distressed afterwards. What an awful thing to laugh at, he sounds like a piece of shit

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 09/08/2020 14:30

The few times I've seen them I found them terrifying and hated the feeling of impotency because I knew all I could do was allow it to pass.

I can't even imagine how the person suffering from them feels.

There is nothing funny or entertaining about it, unless you have the emotional intelligence of a rock and the empathy of a spoon.

Total dickhead, not just for laughing (I could possibly,somehow give him the benefit of the doubt about that) but to brag about and probably expect others to find it funny ?

meow1989 · 09/08/2020 14:31

Gelastic not elastic

Sparklesocks · 09/08/2020 14:31

That’s really nasty.
I’ve only witnessed a few seizures but my feeling has always been concern or worry for the person involved.

It’s one thing to have a compulsion to laugh when caught off guard nervously in a scary moment, but it’s quite another to pass it off as a funny anecdote.

BubblesThaDragoon · 09/08/2020 14:32

He sounds like a nasty horrible ignorant cunt. I have epilepsy too and the diagnosis in my teenage years fucked me up for ages. I was terrified of dying of SUDEP, and it had a horrific impact on my mental health. I don’t think my mum found it funny when I didn’t start breathing after a seizure one time and my lips started turning blue and she thought she was watching her daughter die in front of her eyes 😒. I would say something to him and call him out - horrible person.

Monsterjam · 09/08/2020 14:34

Lots of people have odd stress reactions like laughter , at least he left the shop so couldn’t be seen laughing.
I say this as someone who hardly ever cries but laughs a lot inappropriately and can not stop myself at times

SecretWitch · 09/08/2020 14:35

I have epilepsy. I never remember having a seizure but I do know I wet my pants when I’m having one. I am always mortified. Fortunately, I have only had compassion and assistance from those who have witnessed those episodes.

That man is a piece of shit.

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 09/08/2020 14:39

@Monsterjam do you also tell other people about what you've seen and how you had to run off because you were laughing?

jessstan2 · 09/08/2020 14:40

It could have been nervous laughter, that does happen.

MitziK · 09/08/2020 14:49

@Mumoblue

That's sick! I've never seen a person have a seizure, but I can't think it would be anything other than terrifying. A friend of mine had a seizure on a bus and ended up in hospital because of hitting his head.
It's not terrifying at all.

All you need do is sit behind them and cradle their head whilst somebody calls for an ambulance (as you wouldn't know if it's their first or their hundredth seizure), then, if they become limp, gently turn them over into the recovery position and stay back, as they may be disoriented and lash out as they regain consciousness.

That's if they have the seizure most commonly associated with epilepsy. There is another type where the person just 'isn't aware' for a while, so appears to be looking up but not seeing anything. There you just sit with them until the seizure ends and check when they're aware again to make sure that they do have a diagnosis, as if not, they need to seek medical advice.

An ex boyfriend's sister had epilepsy. She needed to go to hospital once when I was with her, as the seizures ran into one another, but most of the time, she had what were then (not sure if they are now) termed 'absence seizures'.

Means I'm not bothered by seeing them - they're thousands of miles away from the shit that's shown on TV.

itsgettingweird · 09/08/2020 14:55

He's a prize cunt.

Rest assured you aren't that type of person and most people also aren't like this.

I know a few people with epilepsy and so I learnt about it and what to do. I know what their personal plans are too should they have a seizure when out with me.

itsgettingweird · 09/08/2020 14:59

My friends DD has focal epilepsy.

She was having a real deterioration in her seizures and friend was told to catch them on film.

One day she did and she had her first tonic clonic.

We went for coffee a few days later so she could have a chat as obviously was upsetting.

She showed me the film.

I cried Blush

Wasn't the first or even 10th time I've seen a TC seizure.

But the fact it was someone I care about greatly. I ended up apologising for being a total knob Grin

rooarsome · 09/08/2020 15:01

What an utterly vile excuse for a human. No, I wouldn't laugh. I'm a nurse and I find absolutely nothing funny about seizures.

CorianderLord · 09/08/2020 15:07

That's awful.

I have fits (not seizures as doesn't present the same brain activity) and felt myself going on a bus once at uni. I had to lie in the aisle as if I didn't I could have smacked my head on the way down.

Later that day another student posted in the uni social media group about the 'crazy' girl who laid down on the bus and made a joke about if I expected people to pole vault over me. I felt humiliated.

He deleted the post after I explained in the comments that I was about to fall unconscious due to a condition. But why he thought it was appropriate I'll never know.

Luckily when I've done it in public I've known all manner of lovely strangers who have helped me - some called ambulances, a shopper helped me when I had one working in retail, an Asda employee looked after me once. More people will help than laugh.

bruffin · 09/08/2020 15:07

@Monsterjam

Lots of people have odd stress reactions like laughter , at least he left the shop so couldn’t be seen laughing. I say this as someone who hardly ever cries but laughs a lot inappropriately and can not stop myself at times
Spot on Monsterjam This thread is horrible, loads of virtual signalling,"i would never laugh", but it doesnt take a lot of imagination to know some people have a problem with nervous laughter and the man in the OP left because he knew it was a problem. Its a very well known phenomonen

Im saying that as a mother and sister of people who had seizures in public. Everybody is different and reacts differently, I would much rather someone nervously laughing than the person who was gawping as my DS was carried out of Macdonalds to an ambulance and saying "is he dead"

TBH honest you seem to start a lot of posts like this, you seem to like to be the permanant victim

BeaUnder · 09/08/2020 15:08

I have epilepsy and its fucking scary. If anyone laughed at me I'd be so hurt.

StarTrekRedShirt · 09/08/2020 15:16

He sounds very immature
When I was at school, a girl had an epileptic fit right on the stairs, so many things could have happened and instead everyone around her just gawped and laughed (she’d wet herself) my heart bled that she was forever (in secondary school terms) known as the girl who’d wet herself. Children laugh, adults care!

bruffin · 09/08/2020 15:17

I have epilepsy and its fucking scary. If anyone laughed at me I'd be so hurt.
Even if you understood that it was nervous laughter to the situation, because they are scared?

bruffin · 09/08/2020 15:22

@StarTrekRedShirt

He sounds very immature When I was at school, a girl had an epileptic fit right on the stairs, so many things could have happened and instead everyone around her just gawped and laughed (she’d wet herself) my heart bled that she was forever (in secondary school terms) known as the girl who’d wet herself. Children laugh, adults care!
Nervous laughter is not a sign of immaturity . It is a sign of stress and anxiety
Wowcherarestalkingme · 09/08/2020 15:24

What an awful man. My mum has epilepsy and when I first witnessed her seizures it was one of the most terrifying experiences I’ve ever had. How anyone could laugh at something like that is beyond me

Monsterjam · 09/08/2020 17:03

@ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble no why would I? I don’t think telling others about it would be linked to the nervous (or whatever it is) laughter.
Actually I would probably feel awful and tell my husband about it

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 09/08/2020 17:13

Because that's why I think he's a twat. Nervous laughter, anxiety etc all well and good. It happens.

What doesn't normally happen is those people using the incident as a (funny?!?) anecdote during an extended family lunch."

crankysaurus · 09/08/2020 17:23

He's an arsehole, I hope you're DSis realises it.

If it helps, the majority of people aren't arseholes and would look to help and keep you safe. I've done first aid training a few times and it's always on the training curriculum and covered really well. Please don't think he represents most people.

noraclavicle · 09/08/2020 17:39

MitziK thanks for your post, it’s really useful.

Posters who have seizures - can you direct us to links or advice you consider most useful on how to look after someone during/after an episode? While we can criticise the bloke or not as we choose, every day’s a school-day and we can come away from this thread knowing more about what to do to help people!

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