to ask what your childhood was like if you're one of two children?

[thisusernameismine]

Running out of time and we (both v early 40s) are struggling to decide whether to have a second (and final) child. Have a 23 month old who is my entire world and am most concerned on the impact on her.

I also had an anxious pregnancy including a CVS at 14 weeks, pre term baby (just short of 35 weeks) and our whole lives are about to change with a move from a City to a village (where we no nobody but will be closer to family) and I'm interviewing for a (remote working and part time) job next week.

So basically interested in people's experiences of being one of two kids close-ish in age throughout growing up and now. I have a big family and we certainly aren't going beyond 2, if even that.

I had a good relationship with sibling throughout childhood , we were 18 months apart. However adulthood we aren’t close at all, very different and have nothing in common. However I will always still have his back and he mine if I ever needed it.
I don’t think there’s anyone else out there I know I could rely on in any circumstance, no questions asked. Although day to day we aren’t close having a sibling is a different bond to anyone else, in my experience.

I have one younger sister. We’re very different and fought a lot growing up, but she is my dearest friend and was the maid of honour at my wedding. I have a baby and often think about how impossible it would be (for me) to handle two children, but I also think of how lost I would be without my sister, and wouldn’t want to deny my DD of the possibility of a positive sibling relationship.

All my siblings are 10+ years older than me so we had very separate childhoods. I could feel quite lonely at times. We are friendly now but not especially close.

I wanted to have a second child (am pregnant now) to avoid my first being an only based on my experience. There will be a 21 month age gap... I hope they get on!!

One year between me and my sister, we got on well as kids but not so much now.

She has too much baggage around the past; friends; perceived favouritism from parents etc and it make any sort of relationship v difficult.

There’s 23 months between me and my big sister and we are incredible close.
As children we played together, shared clothes etc
Now we are grown up we go travelling together and on trips, talk every day, visit often.

It’s nice knowing someone always has your back.

2 years apart. We played well together as young children, I wore all her old clothes as she grew out of them (I was younger). From the ages of 9&11 to about 11&13 we fought like cats and dogs. Then back to being close again. Shared working wardrobes as older teens which was great as office wear very expensive on a teen budget.

Lost some of our close family quite young so it was good to have someone to lean on and share memories with. It wasn't all sunshine and roses (she has autism + adhd and I'm sure I have my own quirks) but we had a very good childhood together and get on well as adults.

Very grateful to have a sister - wouldn't trade her for the world.

Don't have another baby just to provide a sibling, have one because you want a second. There is no guarantee that they will get on, play together etc. They might just bicker and make your life a misery. It always surprises me that people think siblings are such a panacea. Always someone says 'well, what about when you die, it will be awful for an only to sort things out by themselves', but that makes so many assumptions. If you want a second, go for it, if you really don't, then don't - but do read the books and articles about the benefits of being an only! Think about the benefits to you, too. You do matter in all this.
To answer your question, I have a sister two and a half years older who loathed me for my entire childhood, disparaged and criticised me, refused to play with me etc. We get on fine now, mostly, but are polar opposites.

3 years apart older brother, he was PFB and even more precious because he had a penis, he was/is an antagonist shit and wound me up my entire childhood yet I got into trouble because I either whinged or retaliated, we were also brought up very much in the roles of boys don't need to learn how to do chores as they play sport grrrr, and girls stay home doing housework and learning how to cook, but having said that I do love my brother and we see each other regularly but we are not best friends.

2.5 years between me and my brother. We love each other obviously but we only speak a few times a year - we are very different and have pretty much nothing in common apart from our parents and childhood

20 months between me and my sister she is my best friend. Her kids are like my kids.

I hated her as avhildthough and would beat her up if she touched my stuff. I feel bad about it now.

Gosh, should have said.... as a child though

I loved having a sibling.

Didn’t always love my sister but now best of friends and learned a lot about myself from her along the way. I always wanted more siblings - one felt dull to me and I couldn’t imagine how dull none would be. I don’t want to offend anyone but need to say it - most ‘only’ adults I know are not easy people to be with, so many social skills are developed through sibling relationships. I know this is a generalisation but I think the benefits of a sibling vastly outweigh any negative impact.

There is one year between me and my sister and we have always been incredibly close. I know of other people who are not at all close to their siblings though. I also know of only children who always wanted a sibling (but of course that is not always possible).

I agree that it's all about personalities more than anything else.

Sigh - the usual tedious only child stereotypes being trotted out, I see.

OP, have a second child if you want one, not for any other reason.

Hated it. He's 18m younger than me, stole and broke a lot of my things, would not leave me be and wound me up a lot. We didn't get along ever until we were probably early 20's, never played together, when we were together be bickered all the time.

I honestly hated having a sibling. Part of the reason i'm sticking with 1, plus all the threads i read on here about siblings fighting and driving the parents crazy.

We get on fine now but still only speak maybe 3 or 4 times a year and see each other once a year.